


Eyes To The Soul

by Achilles1011



Category: Lost Girl
Genre: All Human, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/F, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Soulmates
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-06-21
Updated: 2014-09-03
Packaged: 2018-02-05 15:57:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 74,985
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1824058
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Achilles1011/pseuds/Achilles1011
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>At sixteen most people will receive one half of a mark on their wrist, the other half belonging to their soulmate but sometimes these marks do not appear leaving the person forever guessing as to their other half's identity. Lauren Lewis is one of them, but one night while on shift in the ER a mysterious brunette comes in and everything in her world changes. AU. All Human.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter I

I sigh as I look up from my place at the nurses station, the chart for the last patient I see waiting to be filled in. I rub my eyes and yawn, glancing over at the clock with bleary eyes. The clock ticks by, the seconds hand counting the seconds with each tick as the hour hand approaches eleven. I can only be grateful that it's Tuesday, a night that lives in infamy within the hospital for being the busiest night of the week for orthopaedic cases to the expense of all others.

I yawn again as I rub my eyes, the long hours of the night creeping by so slowly as they drain my energy one drop at a time, until I'm left a stumbling and sometimes short-tempered mess. It is normally fairly slow at this time of night, especially since it's a weekday. Although sometimes things would settle down for a few hours only to pick-up again because of various people and their misadventures with alcohol.

I slowly begin to go over the patients that I still have to check in on before they could be discharged.

Bay two's allergic reaction is still working itself through, but if she's improves as much as she did the last I time I checked on her I should be able to discharge her soon enough, with very strict instructions to see an allergist for testing as soon as possible. I also still need to get an x-ray for the man in Bay seven, the poor man is already in enough pain as it is, the sooner that we can see to him the better off he'll be.

Hmm… anyone else that needed urgent attention?

Oh right Bay 11, child presenting with abdominal pain in lower right quadrant, fever, nausea and vomiting, rebound tenderness. Needed to call paediatrics and admit her, she has all the classic signs of appendicitis, just needed to double check the white count from her blood draw and then ah… ultrasound to confirm. And order pain medications for her… she's been screaming and crying I can still hear her her shrill high pitched cries echo in my ear as I palpated her abdomen. I need to follow up with her and then call paediatrics and… who's on call for paediatric surgery tonight?

Need to get one of the nurses to take care of that and call the ultrasound tech… hmm…

I yawn again as I glance up from the chart I've been busy filling in for the man in Bay seven. Without meaning to I begin to listen to a pair of nurses talking, well gossiping really… they do that a lot when it's a slow night.

"Did you hear about Jackie?"

"You mean about her and that fellow from radiology?"

I rolled my eyes at the nurses and their gossip.

"They think their brands match." I can only roll my eyes at the idea of that, of course they would think their brands matched, especially if they were in love with each other. But so often the brands look so similar it's impossible for a human to tell them apart, one small difference in your half of the pattern here of there. But it made all the difference when it came to the match and to the whole soulmate issue.

I sigh and shake my head, the odds of the brands ever matching were low at best. Three billion people in the entire world, the odds of finding your soulmate were incredibly low, some, particularly the ones who were obsessed would find them eventually but others never did. Some died lonely deaths and others married knowing that it's possible their partner would one day leave them because they would the person with a matching brand.

Others, like me, woke up without their brand on their sixteenth birthday, which is when it appeared in the normal population. I sigh and shake my head, glancing down at the wristwatch that hid my bare wrist. If I ever went without it I got stared at, I could catch sight of pity in the eyes of people who caught sight of my unmarked wrist.

It's because people couldn't imagine having to go without the idea of eventually being able to find the other half of themselves, their brand belonging to only two people in the entire world. They thought of us as lonely because we didn't have that hope, we have no idea who our soulmate are, we can stumble through our days without meeting them, and even if we did we would probably never know unless a mark appears on our wrist.

I sigh and shake my head only to see one of the nurses standing in front of me a chart in her hand.

"Bay nine." I sigh and reach out to tack the chart while handing over the ones for Bays seven and 11. "11 needs an ultrasound and I need a rush on her white cell count also give her some acetaminophen until we can get her upstairs okay? And seven needs an x-ray on his ankle."

"Right away."

"Thank-you." I mumble as I open the chart and begin to make my ways over towards bay nine.

Laceration to forehead as well as a complaint of vertigo. I quickly read over the case. She had tripped because her roommate left shoes lying around and as she fell she cut her forehead open on the side of the coffee table.

I sigh and shake my head. I've seen this injury before many times, but it's often in kids or teens who were still growing and who were a little bit on the clumsy side. I rarely see this type of injury in adult, but it does happen sometimes. At least she doesn't seem to have anything that would indicate a concussion, although I should probably still preform a basic neurological exam.

But still.

Stitches. I sigh and shake my head and smile to myself, there were many reasons that I went into emergency medicine, and one of them isn't because of my love of stitching up cuts. But still the ability to make a difference, no matter how small, is a good place to start.

I glance down at the chart again and make a note to double check on the reason for the vertigo, if it's caused by the same injury that lead to the laceration then that would probably need to be checked up on. But I would need to conduct a basic exam before I could do anything else.

I look down again and try to see if there are any notes from a med student or one of the lower year residents but there doesn't appear to be anything.

So I'm examining her first after the nurse huh?

The other ones must be busy with some of the more "enjoyable" tasks of being in one of the lower years. I look up and realize that I must have arrived at the Bay, the curtain drawn around the bed in a attempt to give the patient some degree of privacy.

I reach pull back the blue privacy curtain that must have been pulled around the bed when the nurse left after bringing the patient into the main area. I smile lightly as I walk into the sectioned off area of the floor, my eyes still glued to the chart in front of me.

"Hello." I say as I look up from the chart momentarily to confirm that I'm in the correct bay before my eyes went back to scanning the chart. I quickly mentally taking note of her vitals, for the most part she seemed normal and stable. I can see a brunette woman sitting with her back turned to me on the bed, her hand holding something, most likely her phone.

"Hello." I repeat again, louder this time, it seems to catch her attention as her back arches slightly as she tense visibly. I simply walk around to the other side of the bed.

The woman in front of me is stunningly beautiful. I freeze for a moment as I simply take her in. She is truly gorgeous.

"Doc?" I hear her say aloud. Clearing my throat quickly I look up at her and smile. I can see why she must have come here for the laceration, it's a rather ugly one at the side of her forehead, with some blood still oozing out of it.

"Hello." I say again dumfounded. Despite the laceration on her forehead she looks beautiful, her eyes, her nose, her body… I quickly avert my eyes when I realize that they have begun to drift down to her stare at her chest.

This is so unprofessional. I look up at her again and I could see a smirk already forming on her lips, a mischievous look in her eyes.

Oh boy.

"Hello"

Why is the only thing that can come out of my mouth hello!

I hear her laugh, a light sound that caused her brown eyes to shine in a way that I found far more endearing then I should have. "Hi. But I believe that we've already covered that haven't we?"

Her voice sounds melodic to my ears, it's beautiful just like the rest of her.

Oh stop it please.

I sigh as I place her chart on the bedside.

I'm overcome with the sudden urge to touch her when I see her hand drift vaguely across the bed, seemingly reaching for her phone.

I reach out, so tempted to let my hand run over the back of her's, to feel the skin that I'm sure is silky smooth and warm. I can't help but wonder what it would feel like to run my fingers over hers. I can see her fidget before she turns over her hand, exposing her wrist and a mark that I should have expected to see, but surprisingly I found myself hoping that it would not be there.

I sigh and force myself to focus, silently berating myself for the things that I'm feeling and the urges that I have to repress, the desire to reach out and touch her, and the desire that I felt for her. These feelings that I'm getting for this woman, this patient are highly inappropriate an unprofessional.

Yet despite this I find myself wanting her and desiring her in ways that are so highly inappropriate. I quickly take a breath and force myself to look up at her, focusing on her eyes, trying not to notice the way that they sparkle when they look at me.

I glanced up at her face and feel myself beginning to smile when she smiles at me, a beautiful smile that causes her face to light up and her eyes begin to sparkle. I can't help but think about how breathtaking she looks when she smiles up at me and I have this sudden and inexplicable desire to ensure that this beautiful smile never leaves her face.

"You're beautiful." I here myself murmur aloud before I could stop myself. I quickly close my mouth and clear my throat.

Stupid.

Stupid.

You're beautiful? Really? Stupid.

She's a patient!

I clear my throat again and avert my gaze for a few seconds before I turn back to the woman sitting on the bed. Instead of mortification or anger all I can see is amusement shinning through in beautiful brown eyes.

"I'm sorry." I mumbled before I stand up and walk over to the wall near the patient and grab a pair of gloves from the box sitting on the wall.

"It's fine. Really ahh…" I could hear the pause in the woman's voice as if she's trying to recall something.

"Dr. Lewis. Dr. Lauren Lewis. PGY-3 in emergency medicine." I say as I turn around. I smile sheepishly as I look at the extraordinarily beautiful creature in front of me. "I must have forgotten to introduce myself…" I quickly glance down at the chart before I see that it's blank.

I sigh as I close the chart and stare up at her again forcing myself to smile. "It would seem that the intake person forgot to take down your name."

"Bo. My name's Bo. It's very nice to meet you Dr. Lewis" I swear I could feel her eyes traveling up and down my body as she speaks, I have to fight against the impulse to turn around and just kiss her on the lips right here and now.

What is happening to me?!

I'm never attracted to my patients, not like this. Not in this unprofessional and inappropriate way.

So why is this different? Why is she different?

Is it because she is the most breathtakingly beautiful woman that I've ever seen?

Stop it Lauren! I tell myself as I put the chart back down at the foot of the bed.

I take a breath and force myself to exhale silently.

All right Lauren this is just like any other patient, she is here because she needed medical attention and you are here to provide it.

Not to jump her bones.

Okay, just don't jump the patient and try to think about how beautiful she is and…

I look up at Bo and smile again as I see her smile at me in-turn. "Something wrong doctor?" I quickly reach out and grabbed her chart flipping it open at random. I glanced back down at her chart forcing myself to ignore the flirtatious tone in her voice.

You need to treat her Lauren. You just need to treat her and send her on her way or admit her to the hospital and send her upstairs so that she is someone else's problem.

That shouldn't be so hard right?

Right?

I glanced down at the chart. The only thing it seemed that Bo has been complaining about is some localized pain to the upper left section of her scalp and some vertigo. I take a breath and forced myself to look back up at her. The only thing that I could see wrong with her is the small cut on her forehead.

"So the only things you're complaining of are some dizziness and some pain localized to the area of the laceration?"

"English please?"

"The only thing that hurts is the cut on your forehead? No headaches?"

"No doc. I'm fine, just took a little spill because my roommate left some of her shoes out." I sigh and shake my head as I mentally file that one away under the more ridiculous reasons for a visit to the ER. Sometimes we get the most serious cases in here but other times we get the most ridiculous.

Roommates who accidently leave their things out is not the worst story I've ever heard and this also wouldn't be the first time that I've heard it. I shake my head and smile at Bo again. "Roommate huh? I'm guessing she loves shoes then? Or is she just messy?"

"Both." Bo replies with laughter and I feel myself smile in turn against my will. I can't help but notice how beautiful Bo looks when she laughs, the way that her eyes sparkle and the dimples that appear when she smiles. She looks beautiful but after a moment I see her stop wincing as her wrist turning towards me at just enough of an angle to see her mark.

I can't help but notice the mark that adorns her wrist, the bold black of her mark standing out clearly against the pale skin of her wrist. I could see the intricate shape, the swirls of black dipping in and out looking almost as if they were streams of water captures on Bo's wrist. There were also circles at the edges of some of the streams, some joined together in a pattern that reminded me of a helix, others simply curling as if they were the crest of waves, a few diagonal or straight lines marred the otherwise beautiful pattern in a way to give it a unique mark, separate from the others. It looks beautiful, and I'm sure that many painters would be jealous of the complex and intricate beauty of the mark she bore on her wrist.

But sadly there is one thing that marred the beauty of the pattern in front of me. The bold black lines on the upper and lower part of the mark that formed her half of the brand, the black line above and below from which the streams and waves started off, the only symbol common to all of the marks, forming an open rectangle over the underside of her wrist.

I can't help but feel a small twinge of jealous for the person who bore the other half of this mark, the man or woman who she may someday come across and be pulled to in the way I'm being pulled to her now. I sigh as I fidget with my wrist watch, turning it over and over my wrist in a nervous tick.

Looking down for a brief moment I fiddle with my watch, lifting it up just enough to reveal the pale milky skin of my own wrist, the smooth expanse of white and the blue bulge of my veins unmarred by the blackness of the mark. The thing that marked me different from all the others, and the thing that made me hide my wrist with a watch.

"You're mark is beautiful." I say as I look up at her, she smiles at me and turns her wrist over to reveal the half completed mark in it's fully glory. Without realizing it I've reached my hand out, an overwhelming desire flowing through me to trace the patterns on the marks.

I could a magnetic pull, driving me to stroke the skin at Bo's wrist, to trace the intricate patters that looks as if they have been put there by the stroke of an artist's brush instead of her body. Before I could stop myself I have pulled off one of my gloves, the loud snap of the material barely registering in my ear as I stretched my fingers, shaking them as they adjust to suddenly being exposed to air once again.

A few moments later my fingers grazed the delicate skin of her wrist. Even with only the smallest and briefest of touches I could fell her skin's warmth; it's smooth, and the softness against my own skin. I could feel a jolt, small sparks against the tips of my fingers where they've brushed against her skin.

I could feel her eyes on me, the urge to touch her becoming greater and so much harder to fight. I look up to see Bo staring at me her eyes focusing on me with a half-lidded gaze, barely concealed desire sparking in her eyes.

I gulped at the heavy look in her eyes and at the feelings that they evoked in me, the feeling of warmth between my thighs, but more peculiarly it also sent my heart into an excited fit, but not at the feelings of arousal she is evoking within me with only a single look. I can feel my heart pounding underneath my breast; it's beat a constant heavy drum in my ears.

Why is she looking at me so?

Why did I feel this desire for her? This draw to her?

Why did I feel this inexplicable magnetism, this urge to touch her, this desire for _her_.

Why? Of all the people I have ever meet of all the people that I have ever felt desire for, the heat of physical attraction and of lust, why does it feel different with her.

"Lauren." She speaks my name in a voice whispering full of _something_. My name sounds heady on her lips, as something settles into the pit of my stomach. There is a rightness about the way she speaks my name. I look up at Bo, there's something on my lips, the words heavy on my tongue, my mind not knowing them, but something deep within me does, however no matter how I try to move my mouth they wouldn't come out.

I look down as my fingers come into contact with her wrist, allowed them to rest more firmly against the skin there for a few moments before I removed all but a single finger. One which slowly began to trace out the swirls and the waves of the pattern on her wrist.

"Lauren?" I heard her voice murmur again, and when I look up at her, I can see that her face is all to suddenly to close to mine. This woman that I barely know is so close to me, her face so close to mine, if we were to close the distance our lips would touch in the barest of kisses.

"What am I doing? What are we doing?" I say, much louder then I intended. I take a step back as I tremble in place at the realization of what I nearly dd with my patient? I take a step back and quickly trying to withdraw my finger only to feel a warm hand envelop my own colder one in a tight grip.

"What are you doing?" I asked Bo. I have to squash the urge to panic, to run away, to try and turn this into a scene in order to allow my escape.

I could not though. I needed to treat her and I need to stitch-up her cut before I could pass her off to someone else to monitor her for a little while in case she begins to show signs of a concussion and to keep an eye on her dizziness.

But that warm hand holding my own is distracting, the way it held my finger in place. It's almost as if I could feel the beat of her pulse underneath my finger, it's fast almost as fast as mine.

"Bo you have to let me go, I need to examine you before I can stitch up your cut."

"Lauren take off your watch." The voice is firm and demanding. I could see something in her eyes, a burning desire and something buried deeper. I don't know her well enough to tell what the tone means, but I could have almost swear it's hope.

Hope for what?

Gently I turn my wrist in her grip until I find the week spot before I tug away from her hand, smiling apologetically I'm about to reach over and grab a new glove when I felt a burning sensation in my wrist. Stopping for a moment I frown as I move my wrist back and forth trying to stretch things out.

"Are you okay?"

"I'm fine just a kink in my wrist."

"I hope you don't get one of those while you're stitching me back together."

"Afraid I'll accidentally sew your forehead to your eyeball?"

"I don't think that's possible. But you're the doctor, doctor so if you need to sew my eyeball to my forehead then feel free so long as I can blame you for all the looks I'll be getting on the street afterwards."

"Feel free to…" I can't finish my sentence as the burning sensation in my wrist turns into a burning sensation, followed shortly by bursts of sharp cutting pain. I gasp in pain as my knees buckle causing me to fall to the ground. I move my good hand down to my wrist and grip it tightly in an automatic reaction to the pain, as if the meager pressure that my grip could provide would offer any relief from the pain.

I have to chock back a scream as another wave of pain travels through my arm and registers in my brain. I can feel the cutting and the burning, it's as if something is being carved into my wrist, the skin split open as something is poured into it before a searing heat fuses it back together.

"Lauren?" I hear my name being called, the voice sounded so distant. I want to respond to it, to reassure the voice that I'm alright that I'll be fine in a few minutes, as soon as the pain in my wrist wears off. But all I can do is let out another chocked gasp as my grip on my wrist tightens, the cool metal of my watch becoming rapidly heated from my body.

I feel warm.

Everything around me feels far to warm.

I try to force myself to stand up, it should be embarrassing, to have a patient see me like this, to have let her see me collapse in front of her. I could hear someone shouting something but what it's I can't make out, all I can focus on is the pain of the cutting and the burning.

Maybe if I could get myself to the bathroom and run some water over the skin there I would be able to cool it down and help whatever's wrong with it. But when I try to stand the only thing I can see is the world spinning, the blue of the curtains and the grey of the floor blurring together into a colourful and shifting mass. I can hear a hacking cough begin as the muscles in my stomach contracted for the first time and I force myself to turn my head away in case I became sick.

But all I can do is close my eyes and hope as I feel another round of coughs rattle my body. The urge to be sick is overwhelming as the pain continues to batter my body. I can feel someone calling for me, a far to loud voice screaming in my ear.

It's all so loud, all of it is so deafeningly loud.

I can feel the pain in my wrist getting worse, the heat that is searing through it, as if something has been set on fire under my skin and the flames were looking for a way out. The pulling and cutting sensation continues to worsen, as if a thousand tiny knives are carving something into my skin while retractors hold the broken and raw skin open exposing it to air and never allowing it to scar over, leaving me open, weak, vulnerable. Bleeding out. I bringt my hands closer to my body, curling in on myself in as I try to escape from this awful pain.

I could feel all to well the hand that has come to rest on my shoulder, my body becoming hypersensitive to touch as my nerves were overcome with pain signals.

"Don't touch me." I try to say, but it only comes out as half chocked garble, incomprehensible even to my own ears. But still even if the message has been communicated I can still feel that same hand on my back, the warm touch that it provides, felt through both my lab coat and scrub top, both a soothing comfort and another point of burning pain. I want to try and shrug it off, but at the same time I can't bring myself to get rid of the little comfort I have in this situation.

I try to force myself to take deep breaths, to make sure that I didn't hold it, but despite everything I could feel the pain only getting worse. Those thousand little knives were carving deeper and deeper into my flesh, the burning following as soon as their tiny blades are withdrawn. Centred on my wrist but it still burned up my arm and caused a dull aching pain to move throughout my body.

I try to force my eyes open, to see what's going on around me as my ears registered harried footsteps pounding across the floor. The squeaking of the linoleum under what sounds like thousands of feet, it's all to close to my ear, I need to see what's going on. I _have_ to see!

But the bright lights of the room only burned my eyes as I opened them, the overhead lights the equivalent of a thousand suns rather then the weak artificial light that prevents us from working in darkness. It doesn't matter to me, all I know is the light is trying to burn my eyes, to render me blind as this invisible force burns my wrist.

I nearly screamed when another wave of pain hit me, stronger then the two before it.

Fire.

My entire body is alight in burning pain, searing fire that travels through my every neurone, as it tries to fry me whole.

I tighten my grip on my wrist and pull it as close to my body as I could, a weak attempt by my body to protect my injured limb, and one that only causes the fire to turn into a sun, the corona my skin, and the core my heart. I clenched my eyes shut as I felt my hand begin to spasm again sending out a super nova of pain as my body tries to rip itself apart from my wrist. A ghostly scream registers in my ears, one that sounds haunted and pained but so far away, an astronomical distance between me and the person who lets out those painful screams, but it has to be me.

It's too much, it's all far to much.

This has to be the definition of agony.

And yet the blessed darkness of unconsciousness would not come. I am aware, although barely still clinging to consciousness as the heat of pain sears through me, bubbling under my skin, the flames starving for fuel desperate to escape from me as I'm desperate to escape from the world.

Finally the buzzing and the sounds that were coming from around me began to fade away, my hearing finally falling away as the ghostly sounds and echoes that surround me finally fall into the oblivion of beyond.

I'm completely unaware of my surroundings now, the only thing I feel is the inferno of agony that my body is enveloped in, the cloak of fire masking all other sensations, all other senses.

I try to bite back another scream when another wave of agony overcame me as I'm sure more people touched me but the only thing that I can register is pain, the searing agony that starts in my wrist and spreads through my body. I clenched my eyes and grit my teeth in an attempt to prevent another sound from escaping me, maybe if they thought their work is done, that I have passed into the great beyond they will leave, and leave me alone.

But instead the fire only increases, the demons controlling the knives stoking the forge they use to sharpen their blades, pound them back into place in order to afflict as much agony as they can before they allow their victims to pass. They are invaders in my body, a process that is working against me.

Another wave of agony, stronger then before. The tiny knives back at work, carving deeper layers into my flesh as they try to mark me, to permanently carve their brutal scars into my flesh, the fires of pain only one of their tools to leave me at their mercy, to control me as the invisible hands work their knives, carving into me, carving into me, carving into my flesh and marking me. They will work until they are done, until I fall into the oblivion of their choice dead from blood-loss, infection, or the fire they pass through my body. The heat their forge and my body their tool.

The only coherent thought they allow is why?

Why me of all people? Why are they doing this to me?

Why...

* * *

What is that light in front of me? I wonder as I blink, a small, glowing ball of inexplicable light which brightens the darkness surrounded me.

It hovered at distance for before it whizzes forward, moving up and down around me, a nervous energy seems to emanate from it, one that speaks in rushed movements, and in an inability to hold still.

Without even thinking about it I began to laugh as the excited ball of light continues to zoom around me, darting back and forth over my torso and around my head, the nervous energy transforming into a childish happiness that reflects when it begins to randomly pulsate light, as if it were the only star in the dark night of this place.

"Hi!" I laugh as I reach out to try and catch it, the happiness it radiates contagious.

For some reason all I can is joy and childish enthusiasm as the tiny ball of light continued to zoom around me, pulsing it's light in random patterns of exuberance. I have a sudden urge to chase it just like as a small child would chase a butterfly and in an action that makes me question it's ability to read my mind it zooms around my head once before it takes off into the distant darkness.

Laughing I take off after it.

It's strange that I feel so much happiness at the simple game of chase that the light initiates, triggering a well-spring of locked childhood memories swell forth, a ship rising out of the darkest depths of my memories.

I stop running my joy fading as I remember that this is the first time I've taken off running after anything so uninhibited.

I could see the little twinkling light in the distance stop before it came zooming back to me when it noticed that I've stopped running. The little light zooms around my head, pulsing in a more erratic pattern, a question of if I'm alright to continue to play or if I need to stop tugging at its invisible tongue.

"That's the first time I've ever one something like that." I say to the light as I reach out to try and touch it again. This time it moves so that it hovers at eye level with me for a few moments before it zooms forward and bops me on the head right between my eyes.

Without thinking my hand flew up to my forehead, causing me to whack myself on my forehead where the tiny ball had tapped it lightly, almost lovingly. I look up to see it shaking back and forth, the illumination it gives off flickering erratically in bright pulses of near blinding light.

"Are you trying to say tag your it?" It floats up and down once in response before it takes off again.

Shaking my head I laugh as I began to chase after it as well, but I can't catch it, the ball fading to fast into the oncoming light.

* * *

I let out a groan as I blinked my eyes open for a moment before I closed them again trying to escape from the bright lights that were over my head.

Where am I?

What's happened to me?

That's when I notice something has changed, that something's missing.

There's no more fire.

It is faded, gone, almost as if it were a bad dream. The burning sensation of the forges and the cutting of the knives and their wielders are both gone. I smile in relief at the realization as the first wave of exhaustion hits me like a car crashing into my body. I notice that someone has changed the position I'm in, gone is the pressure on my side as I lay on the floor, instead there is something relatively hard underneath me, supporting me in a semi-seated position. I groaned when I hear the familiar beep-beep of the heart monitor, echoing back the rhythm I feel underneath my breast. The sound is coming from nearby I note as I feel something cool dripping into my arm.

Forcing my eyes open again I let out a silent groan when I realize where exactly I am.

"Sleeping beauty is finally awake I see." A familiar gruff voice tease from the nearby and when I roll my head weakly in the direction of the familiar sound of her raspy chuckle I'm met with the sight of a familiar head of blonde hair as piercing green eyes staring back into my own, her eyes soft with worry even as a scowl tugs at her lips.

"Nice to see you too Tamsin." I murmur, my voice horse and my throat aching as I try to talk. Moving my arms slightly I brace them as I try to push myself into a sitting position only to feel strong, familiar hands come to rest on my shoulders and begin to force me back down onto the gurney, with a gentle but persistent pressure. I groan as my arms give away, my aching body crashing painfully back onto the hard, wheeled bed below me.

"So care to tell me why the hospital called me in the middle of the night telling me that you had passed out on the job?" I can only let out a groan as my head falls back against the uncomfortable hospital pillow, the case scratchy against the back of my neck. "Well Lauren?"

I turn my head to the side, my eyes drifting closed as I pant, tired from even the most minor of exertions. "Seriously Lauren what the hell happened?"

I let out a small sigh as I fight back the urge to sleep. I bring my hand up to rub at my forehead only to notice a bandage tapped to my wrist, the normally white cotton soaked red with my blood. So that part hadn't been my pain-crazed mind hallucinating, my skin actually had been splitting apart.

"Laur." Tamsin's voice whispers, lower this time in warning. I roll my head back towards her, my neck aching in effort to hold my head up.

I smile at her weakly. "I'm fine Tamsin."

"Bullshit Lauren. I don't get called if you're fine."

"Would you believe I touched a patient's wrist and passed out because of her beauty?"

"Lauren…"

Wait.

I'd touched Bo's wrist. I had touched her, had been drawn to her like a magnet to it's opposite pole. The bleeding in my wrist and the pain that felt like something was being carved into it.

I gasp when I realized what must've happened. Quickly I bring my good hand over to the bloody bandage covering my wrist and begin to fiddle with the tape trying to undo it. I can feel a hand come to rest against my wrist, gently guiding it away from the bandage.

"You're not supposed to touch that Lauren and you know that. Do you want the bleeding to start again." She speaks to me as if she's talking to a child, trying to explain to them why they shouldn't take off the bandage that they hate so much. Normally I would listen to her and normally I wouldn't fidget with the bandage until I has to be changed, but there's something that I need to see and the only way to do this is to rip the bandage off.

I look up at Tamsin defiantly as I yank my wrist out of her grip, wincing when I feel the needle the IV catheter move within my vein. "There's something I need to see and the only way to do that is to look underneath the bandage."

I could see the look of disbelief in her eyes before she rolls them and begin to pull the scattered blankets up over me. "What did they give you?" She mumbles, her voice barely above a breathe, before speaking out loud "I'm going to go tell the nurse that you're awake. _Do not_ touch that bandage."

I shake my head and decide to ignore Tamsin for now. She doesn't know what happened, she has no idea what I was feeling in that moment. There's something that I have to check on because if my hunch is right then this changes _everything_.

I quickly move my hand back to the bandage and begin to fiddle with the tape at one of the corners of the rectangular bandage. Quickly I get my nail underneath it and begin to peel the tape back, bringing the gauze with it but before I can peel it away fully I hear an annoyed sound and feel a hand grabbing my wrist.

"What do you think you're doing? Do you want to start the bleeding again?" I ignored Tamsin as she began to berate me for being an idiot. Pulling away the corner of the bandage is all I need to confirm what I have suspected.

Where the skin of my wrist had been white a few hours or minutes or seconds or however long had passed it's now emboldened with a thick black line.

My mark has begun to appear.

I reach my hand out and place it on Tamsin's cheek, forcing her to stop her tirade against my stupidity and her various insults of my knowledge of medicine, as few insults to my intelligence thrown in for good measure. I force her head to turn towards me.

"I know what I'm doing Tamsin, there was something I had to check on, a hunch for what caused the things that happened to me. And I was right." I brought the wrist up into her line of sight, the limp portion of the bandage hanging down and revealing the black of the mark that has appeared on my wrist.

I could see her eyes widen in surprise as she looks down at the mark on my wrist. "What does it mean?" She asks me, her eyes turning towards me wide with shock.

She knows exactly what this means; it's rare but not unheard of.

The idea of it... is surreal, it's just so out of this world, but the proof is undeniable now. It's burned itself into my wrist.

"It means that the woman who I touched, the patient Bo? She's my soulmate. Or at least she was enough to trigger the reaction to make the mark appear."

"So know what."

"We track her down I guess."

"Oh hell no there is no way in hell I am about to get dragged into that mess."

"Well then I guess I have to go and explore and find her on my own. Into the big dangerous city, all on my own."

"Fine."

So know I just have to track her down and see if the mark I have looks anything like hers.

Only problem.

I only have her first name.


	2. Chapter 2

"Dr. Lewis?" A soft voice call out from the other side of the room. Glancing up I see an old and wrinkled, but strong and familiar hand grabbing at the privacy curtain that have been drawn around me.

"Francine?" I ask, my voice soft with exhaustion. I have to wonder if it truly is the kindly old nurse who has shown me so much since my first days here, or simply a hallucination brought on by blood-loss.

"How did you guess, Dr. Lewis?" She call out, her voice thick with amusement, as the rollers of the curtains traveling along their guide-rail. It takes her only a few seconds to begin tutting, and for half of a second I have to wonder why until I glance down at my bandaged wrist and realize why she is making that sound. I can see her old form walk towards me, her slower walking speed and her appearance the things which betray her age.

If you only hear her voice and know her personality you wouldn't think of her as a day over 40, but really she's pushing her mid-sixties.

"You know better then to fiddle with bandages, Dr. Lewis. Now I have to change it once again," She mutters with a small sigh, and her hand grab my wrist gently, turning to face towards her. "Although the cuts do appear to be healing well."

I can't help but glance up at her, does she not realize what's happened to me and the reason that I passed out? That the "cut" on my wrist is in fact the black lines of a soulmate's mark?

She's one of the few people who knows that I've never borne the mark until today. I rarely tell people, instead preferring to hide my wrist with a watch, I think the rumor I heard last time is that my pattern's so ugly it would scare the patients if anyone saw it. That's certainly better then the one before it, which said my mark, had faded to grey because my soul mate had died and I didn't want the pitying stares of others if they were to see it.

I'd gotten pitying stares when that rumor had been floating around.

Although they'd been for completely the wrong reasons.

"They aren't cut's are they?" I mumble as I glance towards the opposite side of the bay I have taken up residence in for the last several hours.

"I see you already figured that out have you, Dr. Lewis?"

"It's why I peeled the bandage off," I mutter in response as I glance down at my wrist, the black lines of the mark's boarder visible for the world to see as Francis pulls the bandage off the wound, continuing to tut.

"I'll be back in a moment, Dr. Lewis. I just need to retrieve some materials to bandage that wound of yours and then we'll send you on your way. Ms…" I could see Francine pause and turn towards me.

"Tamsin." She responds gruffly from where she has taken up residence once again in the chair on the other side of the room. "My name is Tamsin."

I almost roll my eyes at Tamsin's attitude; of course she would default back to her usual sunny disposition when another person's around.

Francine gave a strange look and said, "No need to be impolite young lady, now if you would come with me so we can get your friend signed out…"

I could hear Tamsin begin to grumble as she stood up from the chair.

Just as they were about to walk out of the area that I'm occupying I finally remember to ask about the woman who's fault it may be that I'm even in this bed to begin with. "What about the woman I was treating- Bo?"

"She was taken care of by Dr. Nelson and discharged, Dr. Lewis. Would you like her chart to fill in while you wait for your friend?" I nod quickly and call out my thanks to Francine before the curtain closes behind them and I allow my head to fall back onto the bed.

Dr. Nelson was the one to sew her up in the end. Well at least it isn't one of the lower year residents, but still I can't help but feel embarrassed at the fact that my attending had to finish up my work.

And who knows how many more people were present when I passed out.

The nurses were going to have fun with me weren't they?

It would be all over the hospital before the end of tomorrow wouldn't it? I sigh and close my eyes as my head falls backwards onto the uncomfortable gurney below me. I could feel a yawn coming and when I move my hand to cover it I can't help the wince that crosses my lips when I tugged the IV catheter again.

"Dr. Lewis?" A soft voice call out, and when I open my eyes again I can see Francine standing at the opening for the Bay, gently pulling the curtains closed.

"Yes?"

"There seems to be a slight complication with your request for the chart."

"What is it Francine?" I ask with my eyebrow raised. She would have only been discharged a few hours ago at most, they usually keep the chart on the floor at least until morning because the night shift is on the lazy side most of the time.

"They appear to have lost her chart."

I allow a groan to escape as my head falls backward onto the gurney.

Of course it wouldn't be that simple.

"Of course," I mutter aloud.

The only response I get is a slight chuckle followed by, "The course of true love never did run smooth, Dr. Lewis. Now let's see to your arm while your friend fills out your discharge paper work shall we?"

* * *

"So…" I mumble as I stare out the window as we speed along the deserted highway leading back to our apartment building.

The only response I get from Tamsin for a while is silence. I clear my throat in a gesture for her to say _something_ to fill the awkward silence that has begun to creep in between us. We haven't really talked since we got into the car after I was discharged, with strict instructions to rest, and that Larry would cover the rest of my shift.

"This isn't going to turn into another Katherine is it?" Tamsin mutters. Turning my head towards her voice I see the street lights reflecting off of her eyes, giving me the little light that I needed in order to see her expression. I could see depths of worry that were only beginning to be hinted at in her emerald green eyes, the panicked look to them at the though that this might become another incident like my ex.

I sigh as I force back the torrent of emotions and memories that come with the mention of her name, the heartbreak and the sadness. The questions I have begun to ask myself after we'd broken up.

The fact that she had even made me question my self-worth.

My desire to be a doctor after all of the work I had put in, after everything I had done to get myself to the point I had been.

I clenched my teeth, my hand lightly grabbing the fabric of my scrub pants as it turned into a fist. I could feel the anger boiling over, the cover for the sadness that I'd felt for so long after she had left me. I force my hand to loosen its grip on my pants and my jaw to relax before I began to speak again. "No. I'm not… never again Tamsin, it will never happen again."

It will never turn into a repeat of Katherine.

I've learned my lesson.

I sigh as my hand moved up to brush a hand through my hair, only to wince when I feel the tugging sensation of my newly marked wrist, covered in a fresh white gauze pad. I know that underneath that bandage is a bold black mark, suddenly the bare wrist that has defined me, that has separated me from others for so long. It's gone.

It'd been as simple as tracing the pattern of a mark on the wrist of another woman.

"So…" I could hear her trail off awkwardly, more then likely unsure of how exactly to bring up what we would inevitably need to talk about.

How am I supposed to find this woman when they've lost her chart? Which means that all the useful information it contained has been lost as well.

Although given that the triage nurse had forgotten to even take down her first name to begin with, and her last now that I think about it. I felt somewhat dubious about how much use it would have really and truly provided. Actually the only thing I can remember from the chart is her patient number and another number that must have been her OHIP number.

Really?

I try to recall the number but all I can draw is a blank.

So the only thing that I have now is an OHIP number that I can't remember, and a first name that I'm not even sure how it is spelled.

Bo…

Like the man's name.

Or Bo, or possibly even Bow if her parents had a sick enough sense of humour.

They must have if they had named their daughter Bo…

Unless of course that's a nickname in which case the name could literally be anything.

Or an alias.

But no they have her OHIP number…

I let out an audible groan as I allowed my head to fall back against the seat.

Why am I even trying to find this woman, one that I barely knew beyond a few moments of interaction before I passed out when I'm supposed to be treating her.

I could feel my hand grip my scrub pants again as it slowly dawns on me the road that I'm beginning to drift down. The thought and the idea that I might have finally meet my soulmate, it's daunting and something that I never thought would happen to me because I've walked around for the first 29 years of my life without a mark on my wrist.

Now?

I suddenly have a marked wrist; suddenly I'm like the vast majority of people in the world. There would be no more pitying stares if I were to walk around without my watch on my wrist. It's like I had been longing to be when I was younger, the fact that I had ached for my mark to appear and had begged someone, anyone who would listen for it to appear.

Now it has and I have no idea what to do about it.

Because the simple fact is that I have been burned and scared far to deeply by a person who has worn a mark on her wrist so long ago. I have taken the risk and known it could happen, but I had never thought that it is a possibility.

"Oi!" A voice calls out loudly and clearly, snapping me from my spiraling train of thoughts. "I can see your face beginning to darken, Laur. I know that Katherine did a number on you but…"

I sigh as I complete the familiar phrase. "I can't let one bad experience with one person and one mark destroy my chance at happiness. I _know_ Tamsin. But still…"

"It's hard because of how badly she burned you, how deeply she hurt you. I was there Lauren, I remember it all." I could hear her sigh briefly, an expression I couldn't quite recognize crossing her face. It looked almost like sadness, but with a small hint of something else on her face, something that I couldn't quite place.

Suddenly the car began to accelerate once again and the meager light that the street lamp has provided fades casting the interior of the car into darkness once more. But despite it all I could feel something shift in the air of the car, a sort of tension beginning to seep in where it has not been in a long time.

I could sense the direction that this conversation is heading and it's territory that I would very much like to remain in the past.

What could I say to try and divert her attention away from Katherine and away from her anger towards my ex-girlfriend.

Wait!

Earlier today, that trauma that had come in.

I'd had to use the defibrillator for the first time in a while.

She loved it when I used the defibrillator!

"I used the defibrillator today." I could hear the small intake of breath and couldn't help the smirk that blossomed on my face. She really doe love it when I use the defibrillator and tell her about it.

"Are you trying to change the subject on me?" I can hear the seriousness in her tone and when I glanced over at her face I can see the streetlights just highlighting the look in her eyes, in particular the annoyance that seems to blossom in them. I should have known that she would pick up on my admittedly sad attempt to change the subject.

"I just don't want to go down that path again Tamsin, it's…" I glance over at the clock on the dash to see 3:45 blinking back up at me. "Apparently almost 4 o'clock in the morning. I don't feel like dragging up Katherine right now."

I could hear a small huff escapes from Tamsin before I saw her turn towards me for a brief second as we slowed down again, the small blinker on the dash alerting me that we must have been turning into the parking garage for our apartment.

"Do you have your key thing?" I sigh before I reach for the lanyard hidden underneath my scrub top and pull out the device that Tamsin needed in order to unlock the door to the parking garage.

Thankfully it's still the middle of the night so I somehow doubt that we have to worry about a line up forming behind us as Tamsin fumbles in an attempt to find the garage key.

Again.

I could feel her eyes on me for a moment before I realized that I've forgotten to hand it to her. Hastily I pull the lanyard over my head and hand the thing to her before she can begin to tease me about my memory. I can see her flash me a small smile before she roles down the window and leans over to press the black device to the equally black keypad, a few moments later the beige garage door begins to roll backward and Tamsin slowly inches her car down the steep incline.

* * *

"You mentioned earlier that you used the defibrillator earlier today?"

"You're bringing that up now?" I ask as I fumble with the keys to open the door to our apartment.

"Yeah I am." I can't help the small amount of laughter that escapes from me as I fumble with the doorknob.

Stupid, stubborn thing. Was it twist then lift or lift then twist?

"You have to lift and twist Tamsin." A smug voice say in a mocking mimic of my own.

Glancing back at Tamsin I sigh and role my eyes before I proceed to lift and twist the doorknob, finally opening the dark brown door to our apartment. Reaching over I flicked on the light in the entrance way, stepping aside in order to pull of my running shoes.

I could hear Tamsin's light footfalls as she followed me into the apartment that we have shared since fourth-year university. I allowed a yawn to escape as I'm suddenly overcome with a wave of exhaustion.

Reaching up to rub my eyes lightly I quickly made my way towards my bedroom. I can hear Tamsin shuffling off towards the kitchen and begin to rummage around in the cupboards, probably looking for her vodka.

I look over at my bed with a feeling of sweet longing. The beige duvet covering the warm blue sheets of my warm and soft bed, so comfortable. So warm… I could feel another yawn escape, my eyes closing as my hand moved to cover my mouth in an automatic reflex.

It would be so easy to just collapse into bed right now; I'm so tempted to do just that.

But at the same time I also needed to shower I think as I shudder at the feeling of the grime that's covering my skin, especially after I had taken my fall onto the incredibly dirty floor of the ER.

Normally I would have taken one in the locker room at work before I left to head back here, but because of my delightful collapse I hadn't been able to…

I let out a groan when I realize that I must have forgotten my bag in my locker. The odds…

"Looking for something?" A smug voice call out, I turn around to see Tamsin looking at me as she leaned against the doorway to my room a small smirk on her face as she dangled a familiar black backpack in front of me.

"Thank-you." I mumble as I walk over to grab my bag.

I could see the look on her face soften ever so slightly as she reached out and handed me my bag lightly, smiling in appreciation as I walk over and place my bag on the hook against the wall, the one that had been its place for as long as I have lived here.

"Thank-you Tamsin." I say again as I glance back over at her. "For everything. I know waking up in the middle of the night to come and get me is probably not your idea of fun, especially after you've had to work all day."

I could see her shrug, her shoulders barely moving, before she smirked at me. "Consider it pay back for all the times you hauled my drunk ass out of bars when we were younger."

"Will do." I say shaking my head at the memories of all the times I'd had to haul Tamsin's incredibly drunk self out of bars.

"And about the defibrillator. Did you seriously use it today? Because it was Tuesday when you went to work. I thought Tuesday was Broken Bones Day."

"Really!" I can't help the laughter that escapes me as I respond to her question. I am never going to understand that women's obsession with a defibrillator. "It normally is."

Tuesday for as long as I've worked at the hospital has always been the day that we see the most broken bones, usually broken ankles and wrists. I don't know why, but according to Francis, who has worked at the hospital for easily thirty years, it has been going on for that long.

Apparently people like to work with ladders on Tuesday's for some reason.

All I know is that it usually means a long boring day of stitches and x-rays.

The orthopedics people are usually happy though because it means some surgery for them.

I have to shake my head at the thought but that is quickly shut down when I feel something being shoved in my mouth followed by a glass of water being pressed to my lips.

Without even thinking I begin to swallow so that I don't choke on the infernal thing that Tamsin shoved into my mouth. Quickly I take a few gulps of water in order to make sure that whatever she shoved into my mouth goes down. I could see her looking at me, a small smirk on her face.

"What the hell Tamsin!" I shout out at my best friend as I begin to cough after I finally swallow whatever it is that she shoved into my mouth.

"Antibiotics." Was the only response I got.

I stretch out my hand expecting Tamsin to hand me the bottle that contained my antibiotics without any further fights. Sher hesitates for a few moments before she sighs, green eyes flickering down towards the floor before she walks over to my bag and opens one of the smaller zipper pouches on the side.

She pulls out the familiar orange plastic of a prescription bottle. Without saying anything I saw her walk back towards me, a hand offering the bottle in some sort of peace offering.

Quickly snatching it out of her hand I only need to scan the label to realize that they've given me a broad-spectrum antibiotic.

"How long was I on the ground for?" I ask sighing as I look up at Tamsin, walking over to place the bottle on my nightstand after I scan the instructions again.

Take once every 6 hours without food, which meant I couldn't eat for an hour before or two hours afterward.

Yeah.

How long was I on the ground for to give me prophylactic antibiotics?

"They said you were laying on the ground for a good ten minutes before they could get you off of it and onto a stretcher." I can't help the groan that escapes me in embarrassment at my actions.

I must have looked so incredibly stupid in front of Bo!

Oh god.

I let out another groan and walk over to my bed, burying my face in my palms. I'd embarrassed myself in front of my colleagues and my patient, although I couldn't really help my reaction to the pain, but still…

"If it makes you feel any better they seemed more worried about you than laughing at you."

"You don't know Jackie and Francine, they're gossip mongers. It'll have spread all over the hospital before the end of tomorrow."

"Oh."

"Yeah."

"And I passed out in front of Bo."

"You're worried because you also passed out in front of a patient?"

"She's the woman who's wrist I was tracing."

"Oh."

"Yeah."

"We seem to be saying that a lot this morning."

"Go away Tamsin," I mumble as I reach over to grab one of the pillows from my bed to throw at her.

The only response I got is laughter as she dodges the pillow without even a second thought. I couldn't help but glance up at her and smile despite myself, what else should I have expected from a trained police officer?

And with that thought I also began to laugh at the sheer absurdity of all of this, at the entire series of events that've transpired in the last six hours. It felt good to laugh right now, especially after the air that had haunted us earlier in the car.

For a while we just stayed like that, Tamsin standing in the middle of my room laughing at me for my horrible attempts to throw pillows at her, and me laughing because I simply needed the release.

Slowly we began to calm down, I could feel the bed shifting as Tamsin sat down next to me, panting in an attempt to get air back into her lungs. I could feel her slump against me a few moments later, and I leaned back into her in return.

It felt nice to be like this again, it had been a long time since we had just sat down and laughed. A very long time ago, probably since before Katherine, and most certainly before everything had gone south in our relationship.

I don't really know how long we simply sat there leaning against one and another, just enjoying the silence between us for as long as I could. I can feel my eyes getting heavier as my body's desire for sleep began to overwhelm me, but I tried to fight against it for a while longer, to simply enjoy the time I have with my friend. So we just sat there, and eventually I feel backwards onto the mattress below me as I slowly began to lose the fight with my exhaustion.

"Is it one of your school days tomorrow?" Tamsin murmurs as the weight on the mattress shifts again. I could feel hands come to rest on my lower legs for a few seconds before I felt Tamsin lift them upwards and shift me so that I'm lying across the bed.

"No…" I mutter before another yawn escapes from me and I allow my eyes to drift shut as sleep began to overtake me. "You know how learning works after call duty."

"Yeah. Yeah. I'll be quiet when I have to get up again in… an hour." Tamsin sighs before she sits back down on the bed. "Scoot, Scrubs."

"Why?" I mumble sleepily.

"Because my bed is to far away. And it contains a certain someone who will be extremely grumpy if awoken at this time of night."

A certain…

No…

I blinked open my eyes as a sleepy grin slipped onto my face. "So Ciara spent the night again eh?"

"Are you just going to ask her to move in?" I continue with laughter in my voice. "She's over pretty much every night anyways, even contributes to the bills."

I could hear a small amount of sputtering followed by a small huffing sound and a knee being pressed into by back.

Tamsin really did not like it when I brought up her and Ciara, despite the fact that they have been together for several _years_ , she practically lives with us, and is one of precisely three people who could tolerate Tamsin on a daily basis, the stubborn woman still refuses to do anything about it.

But then again so did Ciara.

I don't think I'm ever going to really understand that relationship.

"Shut up and move over, Hank."

I laugh at the mention of that old nickname.

"Was it the corpse who was named Hank or the guy?" I mumble as I roll over onto the other side of the bed.

"I still don't know and right now I doubt you remember. Now shut up and let me sleep, You're not the one who has to get up in 56 minutes."

I mutter more as I shift over slightly more to give Tamsin the room she needs to get into bed properly.

"We really need to stop hopping in bed with each other." I murmur as I turn onto my side and curl up. I still needed to take a shower I noted when I felt my scrubs against my skin, but it could wait until I got a some more sleep.

"You make it sound like we sleep together every night."

"We do, or we did before I started working at the hospital."

"It was before Katherine actually, before you started dating her was the last time that we did this." Tamsin murmurs.

I'm about to open my mouth and respond that it couldn't have been that long, but just as I'm about to speak I realize that it has been. It really has been that long since she had come into my life during my third year of medical school, since we had started dated during my final year, since she had run off on me without even having the decency to end it properly during my second year of residency.

"I'm sorry."

"Laur,"Tamsin mumbles, her voice thick with drowsiness. "Stop apologizing. It was a long time ago and it isn't your fault."

"But what if it happens again?" I mumble as I glance down at the white gauze pad and the white tape that held it in place over my wrist. "What if this all ends up backfiring on me? What if she isn't the one and I get left again when she does find the person?"

"Then we help you pick up the pieces again. You know we're here for you whenever you need us." Tamsin says with conviction as I feel an arm cross over my waist, holding me lightly. "But seriously you have a mark burned into your wrist, what do you think is going to happen?"

"I find her and then… I don't know?" I shrug, waking up more then I would like. "I guess we try and see if things work? For all I know this could be a completely asexual bond."

"Did she seem ace to you?"

"No."

"Then stop worrying about it. Stop planning scenarios in your head, Scrubs. We need to find her before we can do anything about her, or am I wrong about that?"

I grumble as I shift back into Tamsin more enjoying the feeling of a warm body next to mine for a while. I can feel the arm around my waist squeeze it one more time before the weight is withdrawn and I felt the bed next to me shift as Tamsin turned over. I could feel her back come to press against mine, a content murmur escaping from her mouth.

I couldn't help the yawn that escaped from me in turn. Allowing my eyes to close I reached behind me and pulled a pillow from further up the bed and turned onto my stomach.

I couldn't help but wonder what it would be like if instead of Tamsin next to me it's Bo. If the weight on the other side of the bed and the warmth of the other person belonged to her, the woman I've only met once in passing, as opposed to my best friend.

It's strange to even be thinking that way, for me to be longing for a person I only just met.

But maybe this is that strange pull that everyone always talked about?

The one that tells you that you have met your soulmate.

I can't help but snort in amusement at my own thoughts. The sheer absurdity of the idea was staggering. I sounded like the message that Katherine had left me printed on a piece of the notepaper we had used to leave each other messages. I guess I should consider myself lucky at least she'd had the decency to leave me a handwritten note instead of an e-mail.

Sighing I force myself to burrow further into my pillow and expel Katherine from my thoughts.

There was little point in ruminating over her, and what had happened between us so long ago.

Reaching over I'm about to turn the beside lamp off when I hesitate for a moment as I catch sight of the darkening bandage that's covering my wrist.

Is this the start of a new life or simply the beginning of a painful and fruitless search? Shaking my head I reach over and turn the lights off, plunging my room into darkness.

I yawn as I curl back up with my pillow, allowing the warmth from Tamsin's body and the comfort that my bed provides me to let me drift off to sleep.

* * *

That same little ball of light appears in front of me again.

I could see it bouncing up and down before it quickly zooms over and began to circle me again. I smile as I allow it to continue to move excitedly around me.

That's something at least.

"Hi," I whisper as I reach out and try to catch it, almost as if I'm afraid that I'll startle the little ball of light.

I can see it stop in front of my eyes for a few seconds before it zooms out and away from me a little ways quickly coming back and bopping me on the nose again, and once again I smack myself on the forehead in turn. "Is this your way of saying hello or your way of saying you want me to play with you?"

Once again the little ball comes forward and smacks me this time between the eyes before it zooms away a little ways, shaking once again as if it's laughing at me again. This is all a repeat of what had happened to me hours earlier, the first time this little ball of light had come to visit me.

"Are you trying to get me to play tag with you?" I could see the little ball of light move side to side, almost as if it's mimicking the head shake that symbolizes "no". "What do you want then?"

I can see it move up and down again before it takes off into the darkness that surrounds me.

Without even thinking I began to take of after it, running at the highest speed I can manage, my body weak and aching from the painful appearance of my mark. But each time I got closer, each time I thought I would catch up to that funny little ball it zooms further away and escapes my reach again and again. Earlier I had found this funny because it had seemed as if it was trying to play tag with me.

But now it seems as if it's trying to lead me somewhere.

But the only question is where's it going?

I continue to run after it, the only light in all of the darkness that surrounds me. But the only thing I can do s continue to follow it, something pushing me to follow the light. I could feel something beginning to burn, that same sensation that I had felt just before I had collapsed in the hospital.

I'm dreading what could happen next, the burning turning into the cutting, those thousand tiny knives coming to visit me once again. And a few moments later I'm proven right when that incredible pain began to spread through my body.

I can feel my legs collapse out from under me as the pain began to rebound through my body, taking the breath from me when I hit the ground. I could feel the world around me spinning, the darkness all blurring together into a swirling mass. I could feel the knives once again at work, splitting my skin open, forcing it open, and exposing it to the stagnant air of this place.

I move my good hand to try and grip my wrist, to offer some kind of pressure, to try and stop my skin from splitting open once again.

But I could only scream when my hand came into contact with my marked wrist.

Forcing my eyes open for a brief moment I curse as a wave of dizziness and nausea overcame me.

For the briefest of moments before my eyes close I could have sworn that I caught sight of that mischievous and mysterious little ball of light. But I can only close my eyes in an attempt to fight the dizziness and the spinning world that surrounds me.

"Lauren…" A voice whispers, one that is simultaneously familiar and unfamiliar to me.

"Tamsin?" I try to choke out but then it hits me that it couldn't possibly have been Tamsin, this voice has a different timbre, it's lighter yet it's deeper at the same time.

I could feel that same warmth touch on my shoulder, and that same touch that is paradoxically painful and warm in a way that did not exacerbate the pain.

"Bo…" I choke out.

"Dennis," She replies in a low soothing tone.

"Whaa..?" I let out a mumble as I force myself to open my eyes, I could see a blurry shape, a blob of brown that I could only vaguely recognize.

"Bo Dennis." A complete the name. I could almost here the smile in her voice as a hand came to rest on my back. I wince and try to curl up and away from it for the pain that it causes me to be touched.

"Lauren!" A voice calls me, far away and distant, and as much as I would like to respond, as hard as I try to, the only thing I can do is curl further into myself as the pain once again overwhelms me.

The racket that the person, or perhaps _people_ calling my name is causing, and the headache it was giving me is far to much when combined with the pain from my wrist. I could feel the burning once again, the fire trying to burn its way out through my skin.

Why am I in so much pain again?

I've never heard of this happening, of anything like this happening before. I could feel the thing that's resting on my back moving up and down,all I can do in response is scream. Every nerve in my body is on fire, everything hurt in a way that should be impossible.

The knives were back once again, carving away at my skin, slowly opening the wounds deeper and deeper.

Had the entire pattern not filled in when I had gone through this torturous experience the first time around?

With a shock of pain and burning and an internalized sense of horror I realize that it hadn't, that only the black bars that represent the boarder had filled in.

I force myself to try and take a breathe and calm down. I need to breathe because if I don't I'll pass out here, in whatever this place is.

But when I try to breathe the only thing that can escape is a cough.

"Lauren!" The voice call out again, louder this time, and somehow through the haze of pain I force myself to turn in the direction the sound came from. It's strange, I feel like I'm being tugged in two different directions. One telling me to stay here and to stay in this world, and the other pulling me backward

"Lauren," A firm voice call my name again as another surge of pain overcomes me, causing me to clench my eyes shut and for another scream to escape, or at least I think another one escaped from my lips before I succumb to a deeper darkness.

* * *

I can feel a strong grip on my wrist and hear a vague shout in the distance, well perhaps up close but I could not make out the words that were being spoken. I want to tell the person who's holding my wrist to let go of it, that they were only causing the pain to become worse.

But when I try to open my eyes or to move my lips the only thing that escapes is a scream as another wave of pain overcame me, as the burning fire trying to escape from me continue unabated. The only thing I can feel is the pressure around my wrist increase as the pressure from within my wrist also increases.

"The gauze you asked for, darling. How is she?" A warm, soft, lightly accented voice murmurs as my hearing began to return slowly.

"I don't know. I can't… can you go get some ice? We need to find a way to stop this bleeding."

"Will applying ice to the wound truly help?"

"Who knows? I'm not Lauren, I'm not a doctor, and it's been awhile since first-aide training."

Were they seriously considering applying ice to my presumably bleeding wrist? I could feel the pain spike again, causing me to clench my teeth and my muscles to tense up.

But it subsides only a few moments later, the heat failing to follow it this time, and I can't help but smile in relief at the feeling of the pain having vanished once again.

Slowly I try to move, trying to turn, only to feel an arm come and wrap around my waist, holding me in place.

"Is she awake?"

"I doubt it. She was shifting earlier, she does this all the time while she's out of it. She can never stay in place for long periods of time."

"You would know would you not?"

"Ciara…"

"I know."

I almost groan. I've heard this argument before between them, Ciara well and truly can be jealous, scarily so, when she wants to be.

Slowly I try to move again, kicking my leg lightly. I can feel it move a little and felt a surge of joy in response.

Slowly I blink open my eyes, or at least try, as I have to close them again a few moments later because of the bright light that is coming from the lamp nearby.

"You awake, Lauren?" Tamsin asks me slowly. I nod my head weakly before I blink open my eyes again.

An exhausted pair of green eyes staring back into my own, worry and nervousness reflecting clearly within them.

"Bo Dennis." I whisper, my voice barely above a croak as my eyes slid closed once again.

"What?"

"Her name is Bo Dennis." I could hear a small chuckle before I felt Tamsin's hand manipulating my wrist.

"I'm going to remove the pressure for a second and I want you to open your eyes okay?"

I nod in response and force my eyes open for a brief second, catching a glimpse of the final mark.

It's still red, raw and bleeding in most places but the patterns were unmistakable.

It looks like Bo's, and although only a computer scan would be able to tell us if we were well and truly the bearers of the other half of the person's mark this is a strong indicator that she's indeed my soulmate because the marks had long ago gotten far too complex for the human eye to distinguish.

And at least I have another piece of information on her.

A last name.

Dennis…

It's a start at least.

* * *


	3. Chapter 3

"Lauren?" Tamsin calls out, breaking my train of thought. "I'm going to put the pressure back on your wrist okay?"

Nodding slightly, I allow my eyes to drift closed as a small smile slipping onto my face. I could feel the heavy pressure of Tamsin's grip return to my wrist, muffled only slightly by the layers of blood soaked gauze that covered my wrist.

"Welcome back Lauren." I hear Ciara's lilting voice call out softly, her words more heavily accented then usual to my tired ears. Blinking open my eyes once again, squinting slightly at the harshness of the light, and Ciara leaning against the door-frame to my bedroom, a small bowl in her hand.

It must be the ice that they had been talking about earlier.

Turning my eyes towards Tamsin whose exhausted eyes bore into my own.

My fault.

"Tamsin...?" I trail off reaching over to try and tap her on the shoulder. I should be more then capable of applying the pressure that's needed to stop the bleeding by now, in theory at least, but before I can touch her Ciara shakes her head silently as she walks over to the side of my bed where Tamsin is kneeling on the ground.

"How many gauze pads has this been darling?" I can hear Ciara murmur as she leans down to press a kiss to Tamsin's cheek, a hand coming to rest on her shoulder, massaging it lightly.

I could see Tamsin shrug slightly her eyes darting up towards Ciara before they return to my wrist, staring at it in intense concentration. " I don't know, ten maybe? Don't forget about the blood on the floor, and on the pad underneath her arm. It's a lot," I hear Tamsin mutter as she turns around to press a kiss to Ciara's cheek. "And on top of the blood she lost last night at the hospital."

I could see her gaze move towards the small bowl resting on my nightstand before it darted back towards Ciara. "Thanks babe." A quick press of lips together, I let out a small chuckle, I would shake my head if I could. It's amazing to watch them together sometimes, how they can go from jealous and bickering one minute to sickeningly sweet the next.

"You two can be sickening you know that right?"

"You and Kath-" Tamsin begins as her grip on my wrist tighten slightly as she turned her head backward towards Ciara.

"What the hell Tamsin!" I cry out as my fingers begin to tingle, the circulation on my wrist nearly cut off by the pressure that she's applying in her tense grip.

"Sorry. So scrubs? Did the mark match at all?"

"That's why her wrist started to bleed?"

My eyes drift shut again as I smile at the memory of Bo appearing in my dream. "It does. From what I remember about it." The lines and curves, the waves and the branches of the mark had been imprinted on her wrist is something that I will never forget.

The mark I had seen had been so similar, it had been red and raw, oozing blood from most of the lines, large and small, but the patterns had been unmistakably similar, if not identical. But overtime they had gotten so complex, so hard to tell apart, it normally took computer scans to tell them apart these days.

I could hear a small squeal as I felt thin arms wrap around my body, a heavy weight pressing down on my upper body. With my good hand I reached up to pat Ciara lightly on the shoulder, grimacing slightly as I moved my sore and aching body. I could hear a light chuckle coming from the persons who's holding my bleeding wrist.

Grumbling I try to turn my head towards her to send her a glare only to be blocked by a head coming to rest next to mine.

"Congratulations!" Ciara whispers exuberently into my ear. "She's a lucky woman."

I smile and chuckle as I reach up to pat Ciara on the back again, trying to lift myself up off the bed slightly only to see the world begin to spin around me, the white ceiling and stucco of my room turning into a swirling mass. All I can do is let out a groan as my head falls back onto the pillow that had been supporting it to this point.

"Ciara?" I mumble, as I reach up to tap her lightly on the shoulder. "Could you get me some orange juice or something?"

"Dizzy?"

"Yeah."

"Not really shocking, They told you donated a good litre to the floor before they could stop the bleeding the first time around. I think the nurses hated you because you bleed through so many of your dressings, as soon as they changed one you would bleed through it."

"You sure it wasn't your sunny presence?" I quip.

"Nope, they loved me, hated you though."

I stick my tongue out at Tamsin before I reach over and grabbed the pillow that she had been using earlier in the night, and trying to whack her on the head with it. Unfortunately I forgot that Ciara is still lying on top of me, causing Ciara getting hit on the head with the pillow instead.

"Lauren…"Ciara growls.

I can't help but gulp as I reach out and try to grab Tamsin by the shoulder, hoping that I could use her as a human shield to deflect the wrath of Ciara. She hates it when her hair gets messed-up, especially if it's before her morning coffee.

"Don't go dragging me into this Scrubs. I still have to staunch the bleeding." Tamsin mutters before she stops and glares at my wrist, as if it's fault that I'm bleeding out. She shifts her body, bringing my wrist down closer to the ground as she asks Ciara. "Babe can you hand me another gauze pad please?"

Ciara pauses before shifting on top of me further her weight practically crushing me into the mattress.

"Ciara!" I try to cry out in protest.

"Oh hush you can stand more then this." How exactly does she know that? I'm about to open my mouth and ask when I realized that I probably don't want to know, or ever really find out.

"Here you are darling." Ciara says as upper arm brushes across my forehead, her body shifting until she is pressed against me fully, her weight pushing me down and into my soft mattress. I can't help but sympathize with the Coyote from Road Runner, if this is what getting squished with another persons, unwelcome, body weight, then I can only imagine what the ACME anvil is like.

"Thanks."Tamsin mutters as the pressure on my wrist lets up momentarily before a harder press of her hand and gauze is applied to my wrist. The vice-like grip that she has on my wrist feels like a forceps being used in clamping off an artery, in this case perhaps to literally I note as my hand begins to feel the pins-and-needles sensation of blood-supply being cut off.

"Tamsin?" I groan out, lifting my head off of the mattress.

"Yeah?" She replies, her voice firm as her hand clamps down harder on my wrist. "You feel like you're gonna pass out?"

"Your grip is to tight."

"Ah sorry." She says as her hold loosens, allowing the blood to rush back into my hand, causing it to throb painfully. "So which is it? Bleed out or put up with the wrath of Ciara?"

"Wrath of Ciara." I mutter without a second thought. Between my life and being tortured in some way by Ciara, I have to go with Ciara.

Even if this does mean that I have to spend my day off shopping with her.

I can't help but shudder at the idea of having to spend the entire day shopping with Ciara, but honestly it could have been worse. At least she isn't going to do anything worse then that.

Maybe.

I couldn't help but shudder slightly at the memory of the last time I had angered Ciara.

That had not been a very pretty situation to begin with, and an angry Ciara?

That became a new kind of hell on Earth.

"You're punishment is to rest here for the rest of the day darling." I can hear Tamsin chuckle at my expense, and soon after I can feel Ciara beginning to shake on top of me.

Pretty soon I'm starting to laugh as well.

This entire situation had gone from serious to completely ridiculous in a matter of minutes. I couldn't help the smile that crossed my lips, the feeling of joy that I had nearly forgotten spreading through me.

Maybe this is the start of something new? Maybe this is my chance to start over, and to put all the things that've happened in my past behind me. A yawn escape my lips as Ciara rolls off of me and onto the bed beside me, the sudden shift in weight causing my side of the mattress to spring up. A hand brushes across my forehead before I felt lips being pressed there.

Opening my eyes slightly, I can see green eyes staring into my own, wide and soft, full of emotions that I can't quite place. I yawn again as my eyes drift closed, the blood-loss and exhaustion from my shift taking their toll as I settle back down against my pillows. I can feel something warm and soft being draped over me before a weight settles against the bed near my curled up knees, my arm shifting as the weight settles onto the bed. On my other side is another weight, more distributed weight, and an arm tossed lightly over my waist for good measure. The warmth from Ciara's body behind me radiating to me through the blanket a welcome comfort.

A small but fond smile crosses my lips as I begin to drift off back into the land of sleep.

* * *

"Kat?" I call as I enter the apartment, my keys clinking lightly as I place them in the small glass bowl on the round, dark, wooden table next to entranceway.

"Katherine?" I try again.

"Kat are you home?" I call out as I glance over at the corkboard that is hung up next to the entrance way, over the oak table that holds the key bowl and a few other knick-knacks. But when I look over at the board all I can see is the note I had scrawled out for her before I'd left for my shift early this morning.

_Baby,_

_I love you. I'll be home tonight._

_-L._

The note is still there, exactly where I'd left it this morning, pinned to the bulletin board next to the door. There's no new note telling me that Katherine has gone out, has a late day, or left for any other reason. The board is full of the same notes it has always been, the "I love you"s, the dinner requests, grocery reminders, laundry reminders, who had called and left a message, when I would be home, whether I was on call or not, Katherine's appointment, and reminders of our date nights from both her and I.

There's a note telling me that my hair looks like a monster had frightened me accompanied by a photo of me passed out on the couch. I can't help but laugh at that one, it had been taken after I'd been on call two nights in a row, along with my day shift, after swapping shifts with Larry so he could be with Amelia on her birthday. I hadn't exactly been able to shower during that time and by the time I'd made it back to our apartment I'd been so exhausted I couldn't even make it to bed. I smile as I reached out to trace the picture, my eyes drifting along the small notes of love and promises to come, some contained in Katherine's flowing and elegant script and others in my own messy handwriting.

There were no new notes on the board, not one, Kat almost always left at least one note on any given day, sometimes more. It's strange, and perhaps worrying as well.

I glance down at my watch again, fiddling with the Velcro of the strap holding it to my wrist.

It said that it's six. She should be home by now. She's always home by now unless she had a late appointment, but she always left a note if that was the case. And there are no new notes on the board.

A small shiver travel down my spin as the worst-case scenarios begin to pop into my head. What if she's gotten herself hurt, or has been attacked in someone and is unconscious in one of the other rooms…

I force myself to take a breathe and try to think to calm myself down, to think rationally. The odds of that happening were incredibly low, we live in a safe neighbourhood. It's more likely she's just waiting somewhere, maybe trying to surprise me, she had an emergency with one of her clients or maybe she's just running late. I think I heard that the traffic was bad coming in from the east-end today…

Before I jump to conclusion I should at least check and see if she's home.

"Kat?" I call again as I glance around the apartment, it's far to quiet… had I gotten the time wrong?

I step a little more into the apartment, reaching down to unlace and tug off my runner. I methodically complete the menial task as I strain my hearing, trying to pick up anything that would indicate that my girlfriend is home, but the only sound I can hear is my own breathing, echoing off the walls of the otherwise silent apartment and the beginnings of my heartbeat pounding in my ear.

I can feel sweat breaking out on my palms, causing me to fumble as I try to undo the laces that hold my feet in my shoes.

I really have no reason to be this nervous, or scared. It isn't as if I'm going walk into the living room and find her dead.

I'm just not use to coming home to an empty apartment. Katherine's normally asleep by the time I get home from my shift, or she's coming as I'm going heading off to work, but I rarely came home to an empty apartment. And when I do there's always a reason for it, so why do I have this sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach?

Why am I feeling feeling like this? So nervous? It's not like she's going to up and abandon me.

Tentatively I stood up and toed off my shoes, shaking my head. Why am I even entertaining the possibility?

That isn't Katherine, that isn't her at all.

I'm sure that there's a perfectly logical explanation for all of this.

"She wouldn't just up and leave me, she's not that type of person Lauren, you know that…" I mumble to myself.

So then why did I feel so much dread in the pit of my stomach as I took the few steps that were necessary to cross into the living room?

As I glance around the room everything seemed familiar, the soft brown sofa is up against one of the beige painted walls, the flat-screen TV mounted on the other with the glass coffee table between them, the top dyed the hazy orange of the evening sun. The end tables on either side of the couch that held the table lamps, that would soon need to be turned on as the sun faded into the earth. The stacks of medical and psychology journals that rest on those tables, they are piled precariously high in some places, ready to tip onto the floor. A few have actually already spilled onto the ground. There's also dark wooden bookshelf full of movies and TV shows that sits on the wall just to the left of the TV, the one part of it resting against the floor to ceiling windows half obscured by curtains that were blocking out some of the light of the evening sun that is lazily filtering in through the giant windows.

It's a familiar and comforting scene that made me smile. I have spent many nights out here, curled up with Katherine on the couch as we watched TV, or as we study and work respectively. There were even few times we have simply fallen asleep out here in our exhaustion from our respective days. A few times we have just sat in here and watched the sun set from under a blanket on the couch, her resting against the arm as I rested against her, warm and secure in her embrace.

The soft thuds of my feet stepping on the ground echo through the small, but cozy living room in the place that I called home, and would hopefully soon _be_ my home. As I walked softly across the hardwood flooring I bent down to pick up the journals that had slipped off the side table, the silence of the apartment slowly beginning to overwhelm me despite all the good memories I had of this room.

I forced myself to take another breath as I stood up, gently placing the journals back onto the messy stacks, the menial task a distraction from my creeping anxiety as the small voice in the back of my mind whispers words of deceit in my ear. Shaking my head I banish the demon, focusing on the mundane world of my domestic life. I really need to talk to Katherine about cleaning up a little bit, glancing over at the wall before I looked back at the piles of journals littering the side tables. We needed to get new bookshelves for the journals there are really to many of them to be sitting out like they do.

Unfortunately there isn't really any room for them, maybe next to the TV...

I'll have to leave Katherine a note about it in case she didn't come home tonight.

Or maybe I would be able to talk to her about it during our anniversary…

I smile a little bit at what I have started to plan.

It's a little over two weeks away and I'm already starting to plan out what Katherine and I could do with the day. Larry has already agreed to cover my shift as a favour to me in exchange for taking his the next time Amelia gets sick again, which given her immune system will probably be sooner rather then later.

I smile at the plans that gather in my head as I walk over towards the door to our bedroom. It's been so long since I've taken the day off, and it's been even longer since we've had a proper date. Three years is a long time, a lot longer then any of her previous relationships have lasted, and six times longer then my last and longest one. So it deserves to be celebrated and honestly we needed to time to reconnect and just talk face to face.

Reaching out I knock lightly on the door, mildly surprised to find that it's closed, Katherine rarely…

I could feel the chill that I thought I had bet back settle into my my spin and begin to grow like a tumour as a small ball of nervousness has settled in the pit of my stomach grow like an exponential curve on a graph. I swallow and close my eyes forcing myself to take a breathe and knock again.

No response.

"Kat?" I call out gently, trying desperately to keep my tone even.

"Katherine?" I call again, louder this time, as I begin to debate whether to press my ear to the door to the bedroom or not. I can only begin to guess what I could potentially find.

Would I hear the creaking of our bedsprings? Quiet moans that I wouldn't be able to tell were pain or pleasure?

Am I about to walk in on my girlfriend with?

Were there an extra pair of shoes at the door?

Am I just being paranoid? I have to just be paranoid.

Katherine is the type to cheat. She despises cheaters, she actually asked me on our first date if I had ever cheated on any of my partners in the past, telling me that we would be better off staying friends if I had. She had promised me, sworn up and down that she would never do that to me.

I stop my train of thoughts, forcing myself to take another breathe I turn my head and leaned forward, pressing my ear against the smooth wood of our white door.

For a full minute I stand there, my ear pressed against the door feeling as my eyes squeeze shut, waiting to see what I would hear the nerves in my stomach turning into full blown nausea, and the grip I had on the doorknob become lose as my hands turned sweaty. I feel each second as it ticks by, each one longer then the last as a slow eternity passes, my mind conjuring up scenario after scenario of what I might find on the other side of this door.

For each second that ticks by I count under my breath, the door cold against my ear. I could swear I hear the tick of a clock in the distant, despite the fact we have no analog clocks. I continue to wait, listening as I strain my hearing, pressing my ear harder and harder against the door like a possum playing dead I wait, listening for the predator.

But even as time passes so slowly I still hear nothing. No sound, no noise, not even the little snore that sometimes escapes Katherine during the night. I almost felt my knees buckle as I leaning heavily against the door, relief washing over me.

Why am I being so paranoid?

More then likely Katherine had just closed the door as she left this morning by accident, maybe the neighbour's cat had jumped in through the open balcony door again? Reaching out I gently twisted the knob and push lightly, hearing the familiar creaking of the old hinges as the door opens to reveal our bedroom.

Without even looking around the room my eyes are drawn towards something that is lying on top of the beige bedspread. Slowly, each step filled with trepidation, I walk into the room, the place that is our sanctuary, my footsteps echoing despite the heavy plush carpet underneath my feet, or maybe it's my heartbeat marching in tune with my footfalls. My breathing is shallow and rapid, my throat dry, as I try to take deep enough breaths to calm myself down.

Am I just being paranoid? I have to be. There is no reason to think that she isn't just running late or that she isn't just a bit behind schedule or had an emergency with one of her clients. There is no reason to listen to the whispers of the voice in the back of my mind, the one telling me that I should just run now, that I already know what I'm going to find. I ignore it, there is no way that she would do that to me, she's not the type and besides isn't that something you only hear about in soap-operas?

But I still feel the nagging doubt that only grows with each small footstep I take and with each breath I draw in. Swallowing as I come to stand in front of the bed I reach out and grab the note.

It is written on the same paper that we've used to communicate for nearly two years now.

For a single brief moment I allow everything that had been troubling me leave me as something that feels a little like happiness spread through me, this was so like her, going so far out of her way to try and do this.

I almost smile as I flip the note over.

_Lauren,_

_I'm sorry._

_-Katherine._

I glance down at the note, rereading it over and over again, not believing what I'm reading.

What on Earth?

Lauren…

She hasn't called me Lauren in a note since we started dating, she usually calls me: sweetie, honey, babe, sometimes baby, but she has never used Lauren. She has used L a few times, especially if she was in a rush, but she has never used my full name before now. And she always signs the notes K. Every. Single. One. Of. Them.

I can only stare down at the note in confusion.

I'm sorry.

What does that even mean? I sigh as my eyes drift slowly around the room, scanning for anything out of place. Something strikes me as wrong, the room feels emptier then it did before. I glance over at Katherine's nightstand, realizing in horror that it's completely bare except for the lamp. She normally keeps a picture of her and her parents on it, and another one, the one of her friends and her on the day of their graduation.

I can feel the panic that had left me, the nervousness; everything came back into full force, hitting me like a truck hits a car. I can feel my forehead and palms grow damp as I shiver, my heart beginning to beat loudly in my ears, a ticking time bomb.

I cross the room, everything around me blurring out as I focus solely on the closet in front of me, time feeling like it's moving like molasses. My arms feels like lead as I reach up and pull open the doors to our closet, holding by breath reaching over to flick on the lights.

Her side is empty.

The bare metal bars, glint in the artificial light and the shelves above them are suddenly blindingly rack below that had held her shoe is barren, the white plastic staring back at me as if it were bone. The cold metal of the bars that had once held hangers full of her dark clothing were glinting in the light of the room, each reflection a point being driven into my heart.

I begin to tremble in place, my hands shaking.

Without even thinking I take off running to the storage closet that sat next to the kitchen.

When I yank it open the two suitcases that had been hers were gone, missing.

I run over to the bookshelves that held all of our DVD's, her favourites were gone, the blank spaces staring back at me, a thousand blank eyes giving me no answers to the questions I am to scared to ask. The same blank holes, the missing ones that had been there for weeks I realized in horror as my memories began to fill in.

Glancing around I notice how _devoid_ of Katherine the rooms were.

Everything unimportant is still there, but all of her favourites: the pictures, the nick-knacks, all of it is gone.

I force myself to take a breathe as I run back into our room.

That note.

That stupid note.

There is only one way to know for sure if she had…I don't even want to think about it.

I run over to the door, passing through it so quickly I would swear that I am being chased by flames. I dash around the bed, reaching out I yank open the drawer to her nightstand.

If she had taken…

I rummage around in the nightstand, or I would have if there had been anything to touch in it other then the smooth wooden surface of the inside.

The entire contents had been taken: her coins, that pin that she had kept since her university days, hose bracelets she had bought when she was traveling through Europe, the few pieces of jewelry that she had owned and stored in there, but most importantly her mother's necklace and her father's wristwatch.

Both of them were gone.

I gulp as the tears well up in my eyes, my body beginning to tremble at the realization of what is happening to me.

What had just _happened_ , what Katherine had done.

I feel sick.

I feel like I'm going to be sick.

Fumbling I reached into my pocket for my phone.

With shaking hands I type in my password and unlocked it.

Quickly pressing down on the little phone app I brought up Tamsin's name and hit it, bringing the phone up to my ear.

I can hear it ringing, each one echoing loudly in my ear, but there's no sign that anyone is gong to pick it up.

It kept ringing.

And as it rings the full weight of what was happening hit me, the cloak of denial I had pulled over myself, lifted by the cruel hands of reality. My denial is stripped away with each ring of the phone as the last few minutes settle in my mind, my brain processing the discoveries and trying to fit them together in a rational way, a way that explains it differently from what I could surmise from the evidence in front of me.

But it couldn't because I already know what happened.

"What ever reason you're calling, if it's important I'll get back to you. If not don't waste my time." I could hear the recording for Tamsin's voice-mail comes through the speaker.

"Tamsin?" Is all I can choke out before my voice cracked and the phone slip away from my ear as my grip on it loosened and a sob escaped me for the first time, followed by another one, and another one. I see feel my vision become clouded as I began to cry.

I could feel my legs buckling under me as I fell forward onto the bed. The faint smell of lavender and something that had just been _Katherine_ wafting into my nose.

Katherine had _left_.

She had just walked away from me and disappeared without a trace.

I bring my hands up to cover my eyes as I curl in on myself in bed, sobs beginning to rack my body as time begins to flow around me again.

* * *

Waking up I can feel my heart beating rapidly in my chest, my breathing shallow as I force myself to sit up in bed.

That dream felt all to real, or maybe it felt all to real because it's a memory.

One that I thought I had buried a long time ago.

I bring a hand up to my forehead, fingers reaching up to run through my hair as I curl my knees close to my chest, resting my elbows on them lightly. Why now of all times? And why this particular memory? Of all the ones that I thought I had buried and clocked, that was the one that I thought I had buried the deepest, although apparently it hadn't been deep enough.

But why had that memory surfaced now of all times? As a dream of all things?I have dreamed of seeing Katherine again, but I have never dreamed of that day. Not since the night Ciara brought me back here. Is it because Bo had appeared? Because my mark has appeared? Is this my subconscious' way of trying to warn me about something? To warn me against something? I don't understand.

Pulling my hand back from my forehead I stare down at the white cotton of the bandage, the one I know covers the ink black marks that now mares my once unmarked wrist. The lines, the curves, the dips, and the swirls, the ones that echo the pattern that belongs on Bo's wrist, the one of a woman I have only met once in the real world, and possibly a second time as a hallucination in a dream or maybe that dream had been real.

I don't know anymore.

I don't know anything anymore.

I can only murmur sadly at the memory of the inky blankness that covered Bo's wrist. It was so different from the few images I have in my head of my hand being intertwined with another person's whose mark had looked so different from Bo's. Katherine's mark is been so different; it's one of the geometric ones, rare in North America but common in the Middle East and Northern Africa. It's all thick boxy lines, squares and rectangles. A stark contrast to the one that now marked my wrist was one of the most common types.

I had thought that her's was beautiful, one of the prettiest, I had ever seen but in the end that had been what destroyed us. Sighing I shake my head as I look around my room, bringing my hand up I wipe away the wetness that had gathered on my cheeks. The tears that must have escaped from my eyes as I relived that horrible memory in my sleep.

Glancing over at the clock that occupied the bedside table I could see the faint glow of the red numbers, it's 10:00, so in the end I had only gotten a few hours of sleep.

Other then that my room was in total darkness, the blackout curtains that Tamsin and I had picked out together so long ago hanging over the windows, blocking the sunlight from my room.I couldn't help but laugh a little bit at the memory of trying to pick out those curtains with Tamsin. Between the two of us it had taken nearly an hour to even find the stupid blackout curtains. Every other place that we had been was sold out when we went to get them, apparently it was first year resident buying season as well as the more gung-ho med student. We had finally ended up in this strange place that specialized in novelty curtains. The only place in the entire city that hadn't been sold out, but of course the owner had no idea where they were, although in retrospect I'm fairly sure that he was high at the time. We had found them between the daffodil print curtains and the ones that were a shade of pink that would make Pepto-Bismol jealous. I can't help but laugh at the memory of the look of horror on Tamsin's face as she'd had to handle the "bright pink monstrosity." Of course I'd never had much use for them because shortly after we'd put them up, an adventure in of itself, I'd begun to sleep at Katherine's on a regular basis.

Sighing and shaking my head as I force myself to remove the blanket from my legs and stand up, yawning heavily as I did so.

Glancing over at the clock I let out an irritated grumble when I realized what time it is.

I needed to take another round of those stupid antibiotics.

Blegh.

Reaching over to my bedside lamp I quickly move my fingers to the slide and press the little rod through the knob.

Now where had Tamsin put that little… oh right she had handed it over to me.

So where had I put that little orange bottle of fungus derivative?

"Ahah." I shout when I spot it a few steps away, lying on the ground halfway between my backpack and my bed.

I must have dropped it last night when I tossed the pillow at Tamsin's head.

Reaching down I caught sight of the bandage job on my wrist for the first time. The cotton and tape monstrosity was dotted with small specks of blood over the tap, telling me that Tamsin had handled it with her bloody drying hands.

How exactly had I not noticed this monstrosity before? It was huge!

But apparently necessary I noticed when I caught sight of one of the untapped portions of the side.

The first layers were bright red, and the next few were pink with blood.

Shaking my head I reach down, muttering. "Tamsin certainly is not a doctor or a nurse or even a med student."

The bandage job looked exactly like a first responder would do it. Staunch the bleeding first, functionality second, aesthetics and patient comfort last.

It was about five layers of gauze too thick to be comfortable.

Sighing I reached down and grabbed the bottle of antibiotics before I stood up and began to make my way towards the kitchen to grab a glass of water to help me swallow these things.

As I reached out to open the door another thought absently struck me.

When I took these I wouldn't be able to eat for another hour after this.

I could already feel my stomach growling in protest, angry that it hadn't been fed since yesterday.

Muttering to myself I reached out to pull open the door to my bedroom. Peeking my head out I called out, "Tamsin? Ciara? Are you guys here?"

Normally I wouldn't even ask them this question, they both worked at this time of day, having much more regular work schedules then mine ever will be. But still, I couldn't help but feel slightly disappointed when I didn't hear anybody call out in response.

But what else should I have expected? Them to be home?

"Well I'm certainly feeling needy this morning aren't I?" I grumble to myself as I reach into the cupboard for a glass.

I could feel my eyes drifting towards the fridge in longing as my stomach growled once again.

Maybe I…

No.

I force myself to look back at the little orange pill bottle in front of me, and the clear glass sitting next to it on our particle board countertop.

Reaching over I grabbed the glass and walked the three steps necessary in order to reach the sink, reaching out and turning on the tap.

Bo…

The name drifted through my mind almost of it's own accord.

What did I really know about this woman other then her name?

Well based upon the brief interaction during which we exchanged precisely three sentences I can say for sure that she is incredibly beautiful and seems to be incredibly at ease with herself. There is also this magnetism to her, this way about her that simply seems to demand the attention f the people around her.

I snort slightly in laughter at my own thoughts. I already sounded hopelessly gone, even just beginning to talk about her.

Although was it so crazy to think that I may already be a little bit gone?

Hmm…

Ice would be good was the thought that drifted through my mind as I reached out to turn off the tap.

Ice floating in water.

Eyeballs.

I can't help but burst out laughing at the word that suddenly drifted through my mind. Where did that even come from?

Shaking my head, I can't help but smile that word reminding me of the exchange I had with Bo.

And I can't help but realize how lame the joke that I made was.

"Sew your eyeball to your forehead? Really." I can't help but sigh as I set the glass down, reaching over to pop open lid to the pill bottle.

And now I'm sounding like a teenager who is worried about whether her crush likes her or not.

"Press and twist or twist and press?" I mutter to myself as I fiddle with the bottle to try and open it.

Glancing around the room I continue to fiddle with the pill bottle hoping that muscle memory will take over and I will magically open the pill bottle. I spot the shinny metal and glass of the desk that Ciara brought here at some point over the last year.

And I can't help but desire to allow my forehead to meet the nearest solid surface.

The Internet.

Of course.

If you want to try and find someone that is probably the best place in existence to begin a search.

Glancing over at the clock I note the time 10:10.

I have an hour before I can eat and what better way to try and fill the time then to begin the search for my disappearing soulmate?

A small popping sound reaches my ears as I look down to find the pill bottle had opened itself up magically.

Maybe things were beginning to go my way after all. Despite the 12 layers of gauze taped to my right wrist and the fact that I'm taking antibiotics, and have to search for the woman who is most likely my soulmate via the wonders that is modern technology.

My stomach growls again.

And the fact that I have not eaten in, I glance at the clock again, nearly 14 hours.

I shrug a little as I tap one of the pills out, popping it into my mouth and chasing with water.

At least I have a place to start in my search.

* * *

My hand slams down on the comforter of the bed next to me as yet another search fails to turn up _anything!_

I had tried Canada 411.

No luck. There had not been anyone listed under the name Bo Dennis in the entire town, and the closest person with that name lived over a thousand kilometres away.

And he had been a man.

That had been an awkward phone-call.

Especially since he was already with his soulmate, computer matched and everything, and married to his partner of twenty years.

I don't remember Bo being a man.

I'm fairly sure that Bo is a local given that she came to the ER because she tripped over her roommate's shoes.

I would never even think to bring my old roommates on trips with me.

Argh… I sigh as I shake my head once again.

Yellow pages.

Nope, nada.

General internet? Nothing.

Not even a Facebook page, or at least not one that I could find.

No twitter either, I had searched for everything from Bo Dennis to B.D. But there had been nothing on there.

I had even gone back and checked MySpace! But there was no sign of any of those, I had even gone over to some of the older social networking sites that I'd had to stretch my brain to even begin to remember.

Honestly I'm surprised that half of these sites are still up. I thought some of them had shut down years ago. But nope, there web pages still exist, although going back I've found navigating them far harder then I remember it being.

Maybe I'm just old.

Actually I feel old right now.

I had actually resorted to combing through the newspaper archives. I had ended up back in the 90's, but all I could find was the image of an old woman. It had been labelled Ysabeau McCorrigan, and she hadn't really looked at all like Bo.

Well she sort of had, but I couldn't find her obituary to see if a granddaughter was mentioned. Just the picture and the caption. And the last time I checked Bo was about my age, maybe a few years older, not a dead old woman.

I snorted, that would be even more tragedy in my life, and it would be like yet another element of a TV show. My mark would have come in grey if she had been dead, and when I glanced down and lifted the gauze to the side I could still see the inky blackness staring back at me.

I sighed as I shook my head.

Glancing over at the screen I sighed as my eyes scanned through the lists of articles that I had pulled up in desperation, I had literally ended up turning to Google Scholar to see if she might have published any papers. But the only thing I could find even close to that name was Ysabeau Dennis, which I doubt is her.

The paper that I could access did not strike me as being written by a woman who had come through the ER at my workplace because she had tripped over her roommate's shoe and banged her head into the coffee table. This was published in a fairly reputable psych journal, and although it was the thesis of someone pursing their master's degree it was incredibly well written and research, a unique topic as well.

Soulmate Marks and Partner Selection.

Boring title, interesting material.

I sighed as I clicked the back arrow, pulling me back into the infinite list of papers that I had pulled up in my desperate search.

Where was I even supposed to begin to look for her?

Why did I feel this driving need to find her?

To simply prove to myself that she existed?

I sighed as I allowed my upper body to fall backward onto the bed, my head making a dull thump as it hit the pillow behind me, the zipper of my hoodie protesting as it was jostled again. Reaching over I closed the lid to the computer and sighed, allowing my eyes to drift shut.

Maybe if I could take a nap I would be able to clear my head a little bit and actually come up with an idea.

Hmmm…

That sounded good actually. I yawned slightly as I curled up into myself a little bit, enjoying the feeling of wearing pyjamas for the first time in days. I could feel the dampness of my hair clinging to my skull but at the moment I couldn't care less about that surrounded me.

All I really wanted to do was sleep for a little while, maybe Tamsin would have some idea of what to do when she got back from work. Maybe I could get her to search the name?

Or maybe if I dreamed about her and that strange little ball of light again. Maybe I could ask her for her address this time, or maybe even her phone number. At this point I would settle for longitude and latitude.

Or maybe I'll dream about meeting her again and finally find out what that stupid OHIP number was that I know was on the form but I can't seem to remember to save my life.

I yawned as I curled up slightly, pulling my knees towards my chest. Reaching over I pulled the blanket over me and closed my eyes, snuggling into the warm comfort of the soft fabric.

But just as I was about to drift off to sleep something interrupted my slow descent into sleep.

"You've got to be kidding me." I muttered as I pulled the blanket over my head a groan escaping, was it to much to ask to let me get some sleep after the night and day that I'd had?

Another round of the same incessant and annoying ringing coming from the phone in the kitchen, the automated voice calling out a number that I didn't recognize.

_The ringing of the stupid telephone was keeping me awake._

I was so tempted to ignore it, if the call was important they could leave a message or call back later when Tamsin and Ciara were home. I was supposed to be resting!

But as it went through another round of ringing and another read through of the number I reached over and pulled the blanket off of me. Shivering slightly from the sudden change in temperature I sigh as I force myself to sit up and stand in rapid succession before I dash into the kitchen.

I quickly spot the phone resting on the breakfast counter out of it's cradle, the grey and black cordless phone ringing like there is no tomorrow, the voice practically shouting out the number I had heard three times already. Taking a breath and forcing the annoyed feelings to the side I reach out and grab the phone, quickly pressing the talk button and pressing the phone to my ear.

"Hello?" I say, trying to keep my voice neutral. The caller doesn't need to know that I'm annoyed with them.

Yet.

"Dr. Lewis?" I hear a tentative voice on the other end call out. It sounds familiar, but at the same time it's distorted through the phone line.

"Speaking."

"Uhh… I don't really know how to put this, but I think we've met before?" I sigh as I shake my head.

"Can I ask who is calling me?"

"You are Dr. Lewis correct? Dr. Lauren Lewis?"

Her voice saying my name is all I need to realize who exactly is on the other end of this conversation. There is a familiarity to the way she speaks my name that is far more comforting then it should ever be.

"Bo?" Is all I can breath out, suddenly I feel my knees go weak as I stumble my way towards the couch, cradling the phone in both my hands as feelings of disbelief washed over me. How was it possible that it was her? That this almighty search that I should have had to undertake is ended with a single phonecall?

"Lauren." Her voice sounds breathy on the other end, and I can feel myself getting a little warm at the thought that I could do that by only saying her name. What would I be able to do to her if I could see her in person?

What would she do to me?

"Hi Bo." I mumble into the phone, my voice far more tentative then it should be.

"Hi Lauren." I hear her respond as I felt my heart begin to flutter, it's beats echoing strongly against my chest and a feeling of warmth settle's into my stomach.

For the first time in a long time I feel content.

I feel like I'm home.


	4. Chapter 4

"Can you take a deep breath for me?" The young woman nods, struggling to keep her eyes open as she's overcome with exhaustion from the asthma attack she's having.

There's still a slight wheeze through the stethoscope I have pressed against her back as I listen to her lungs. The wheeze is also audible in her breathing still, but she doesn't sound as bad as when she first came in.

"Well you sound less like a squeaking clarinet now." She smile lazily in response, a few puffs of air passing with a tone of amusement from her.

"But you are still wheezing, so we're going to have to keep you on the treatment for a little longer okay?" She make a face at the idea, and I feel a twinge of sympathy for the young woman. I smile at her in reassurance as I pull the cold metal of the stethoscope away from her back and help her to place the mask back over her mouth and nose. Glancing up at the monitor on the wall I can see that her pulse ox is recovering well, but her heart rate is starting to climb.

An unfortunate side effect from the nebulizer no doubt. "I'm all done for now, but I'll be back to check on you in a little while okay? Just keep breathing in the medication and you'll be back at…"

I glance down at her chart. My eyebrow drifting upward when I read what had triggered the asthma attack in the first place.

Asthma attack due to… Quidditch?

Okay… It must have been the exercise.

"You'll be back on your broom in no time okay?" She smile weakly before her eyes drift closed again.

Shaking my head I reach over and pull the curtain open enough to let me out of the Bay. Walking over to the desk I hand the chart over to Francis.

"Can you check up on her again in about five minutes please?" I ask.

Francis glances up at me in response, his old and wrinkled face becoming ten years younger as he smiles politely at me in acknowledgement.

"What?" I ask as I stare down at the short old man dressed in scrubs patterned with the human ear.

I don't quite know the story behind those, and to be honest I'm not entirely sure that I want to know.

"Someone's been awfully smiley lately." I shake my head and try to force a smile down, but it kept coming back, wanting to make an appearance and reflect the happiness I'm feeling on the inside.

"Lauren." I hear the sing-song voice of Francis call out, trying to bring me back to the reality. I glance back down at the man sitting in his chair at the nurses station, an all to knowing smile on his lips, and a mischievous look settle into his eyes.

"So will you tell grandpa F what's going on?" But before I can open my mouth to refuse I hear someone else calling out my name from nearby.

"Dr. Lewis." Looking over to the side I can see Francine walking towards me, a gentle look on her face, although it's also one of annoyance.

When she reached the nurses station I felt her grab my wrist and lift it up, turning it over so that she could see the gauze still tapped over my marked wrist.

Despite the fact it's been almost a week it has yet to stop bleeding completely, something not unheard of, but rare. She sighs and tuts as she looks down at the dressing that still covered my wrist.

"This bandage needs to be changed again Dr. Lewis. Would you come with me if you could spare a moment?" I glance around the ER, it's relatively quiet now, busy but not overcrowded.

They could spare me for a moment no doubt, at least hopefully they could. Glancing up at the clock on the wall I feel my stomach drop when I notice what time it is.

Ten to ten. I would have to take the evil little pill of fungus derivative soon. Growling at the thought of swallowing another antibiotic I sigh and glance over at Francine.

If I went with her I would escape from Francis, who's no doubt fishing for juicy gossip stories, and possibly be able to put off the antibiotic for a minute or two.

On the other hand though if I were to walk away from Francis, it would be rude for one thing, and for the other he might…

I shudder at the thought of what he might do to me, if it's anything like the last time with Larry...

I would end up going crazy from the stitching, and I might suddenly find myself with all the… _interesting_ patients.

Never anger the nurses is a lesson I'd learned during my first month here when Larry did… something to anger Francis. I'm still not sure how exactly he managed to anger Francis to the point that the flamboyant old man decided that Larry should endure his wrath.

But when I glance down at the wrist that Francine still held in her firm grip I know that she is correct.

I'm staring back at blood-tinged gauze again; the central part of the pattern hasn't stopped oozing blood yet, leaving an impression of tight waves and curling vines in the gauze. Another hour and the pad would be soaked in its entirety.

And that tended to scare the patients when it happened.

I'd already had one little girl scream when she saw my wrist as I put it in a glove.

She thought that a vampire had bitten me because that's the parts that had bled through the gauze at the time made it to look I had two little puncture marks on my wrist.

Smiling at Francis I mumble my apologies to him before allowing Francine to lead me to one of the empty exam rooms. I could hear him grumbling something to himself as she lead me over to the room, her hold on my wrist none-to-gentle, as if she were afraid that I'm going to run away. I have to wonder where she thought I would run to, it's not like there are any places to hide in the ER, not unless you get really creative at least.

"Do you want to hop up onto the table for me Dr. Lewis? I already have everything that we need to get your bandage changed." I smile gratefully at Francine as I walk over and hop up onto the exam table, the paper covering on the table crinkling as it's disturbed.

"Thank-you Francine for doing this for me." I say as I play with the corner of the tape covering my mark.

The black lines that marred my wrist, and the mark that connected me to Bo in ways that were far beyond our current understanding of the natural world. I glance up at Francine as she patters around at an area near the countertop as she begins to put supplies onto the tray that we used for bandaging people sometimes.

"Dr. Lewis? May I ask you if you were ever able to track down that young woman who came in that night? The one that left you with the mark on your wrist?"

I laughter to escape and a smile to cross my lips at the mention of Bo and that infamous visit of hers. I had been right that it would get around the hospital, and just like I had thought it would it spread far to quickly for this places own good.

"I'll take it by the laughter and that beautiful smile on your lips that you found her didn't you? Your soulmate?" I smile again and shake my head as Francine sits down in front of me on the wheeled stool.

"It's more like she found me." I say as I begin to tell her about my frantic search through the internet for Bo.

"You ended up finding her grandmother?" I laugh and nod again because as it had turned out that picture of the old woman I had stumbled upon was her grandmother.

"Her obit but yes I did indeed find her long and dearly departed grandma."

"And as it turned out the name that she gave us was not her proper one?"

"No, she goes by Bo but it's a nickname for Ysabeau." Which is exactly why I couldn't track her down, because of course it's a nickname. Although I do have to question how I'm supposed to know that it's a nickname for Ysabeau. "But then again she had a much easier time tracking me down. I'm in Canada411 under my name, the one that I gave her, and she had my workplace as well."

Francine pauses for a moment before her eyes light up in recognition, and laughter escaped from her lips as her gloved hands reached down to pull the bandage off, the pain minimized by years of experience and training. "That may well have been my doing Dr. Lewis, a woman called the desk and said that she wanted to thank-you for treating her, but she couldn't get a hold of you because…"

"I was at home bleeding half to death?"

"You did end up back in the ER that night because of how much of your blood volume you lost."

I sigh and snort at the memory of Tamsin dragging me back into the ER that night. Apparently I had and I quote, "Lost my body weight in blood to that stupid mark of yours. Your blood if flowing out of you like a river. And I'm getting sick of changing the gauze every two hours you nitwit! So we're going back to the hospital where _they_ can actually do something about your stumbling bloodless self"

I had gotten a lecture on blood volume for a detective who can't tell me the difference between plasma and whole blood, Ciara had chiming in as we drove back here.

"You know Dr. Lewis I don't remember my mark filling in being as bloody as yours was." Smiling at Francine I shrugged my free shoulder a bit. The amount of bleeding I'm doing isn't without precedence in the literature, most people had to sleep with an absorbent pad on their bed the night of their sixteenth birthday because of the bleeding that they would endure as their marked filled in painlessly overnight.

"It's fine… it's just good to finally have it. Without the mark I used to get looks of sympathy from total strangers." Francine's eyes become distant as she paused, the gauze that she's holding to my wrist being applied with far too much pressure.

I can feel the tingling beginning to set in my fingers, my hand growing heavy as the blood flow is cut off due to the pressure.

"Francine?" I call out, trying to get her attention, in an attempt to get her to let go of my wrist, and to stop cutting off the flow of the blood to my right hand.

"Francine! My hand." I call out a little louder in an attempt to get her attention. She blink her eyes blearily as she shakes her head, coming back to herself. She smiles at me before she releases my hand.

I shake it lightly in an attempt to get the blood flow to return to my hand. "I apologize Dr. Lewis, your comments simply brought back some memories of mine."

I want to ask her what's going on, but before I could she began to talk again, asking me questions about Bo.

I can see her mouth moving, asking me far to many questions for me to respond to at once, and I'm unfortunately unable to answer the majority of the things that she is asking about.

"I'm sorry Francine, most of those I don't know the answer to. It hasn't come up yet in any of our talks, well mostly texting." I smile as I begin to tell Francine a little more about Bo. "She's a student right now, perusing a Ph.D. in Psychology. I actually stumbled across her masters thesis as I was trying to dig up any information I could find on her."

"So you're dating a doctor." She laughs as she begins to tape the gauze pad over my wrist. "You say that you've been texting? Have you not met her properly yet?"

I glance at her, an eyebrow raised. She has been on shift every time that I've been on for the last week. I haven't had a day off since the day after my mark appeared and Bo is busy as well, incredibly so actually. She's beginning to work on the last stages of her dissertation as well as finishing her research.

"We haven't had time. She's busy and I'm busy, and our schedules haven't matched. Or at least…" I smiled as my hand drifted to the phone that's resting in my lab coat pocket.

"I can see it in your smile Dr. Lewis, you're going to be meeting her, officially, for the first time soon aren't you?"

I can feel my smile widen as I nod my head. "Tomorrow actually. We're meeting in the park. I… right now it feels a little surreal I guess." I mumble.

I can feel her pat my knee gently as she presses the final piece of tape to cover the gauze over my mark. "It's real Dr. Lewis. You have proof of that on your wrist. If you had not met her, I wouldn't be tapping up your wrist yet again now would I?"

I smile at Francine again, and squeeze the hand resting lightly against my knees. "I know."

"Anytime Dr. Lewis. Now do you have pictures of this young woman?" I laugh as I reach in to pull out my phone and show her the picture of Bo and her roommate Kenzi, that Bo had sent me.

* * *

A shrill beeping penetrated the darkness that surrounds me, pulling me from the comfortable cocoon of sleep and back into the horrible and evil real world where I'm not allowed to sleep. Reaching over I grope around on my nightstand trying to find that infernal pager of mine as the incessant vibrations and beeping continue.

I want so badly to curl back up in a ball and continue to get the sleep I so desperately want and need but I have a duty to my patients and to the hospital to come in whenever they called me. Which sadly is often enough that it can be sleep-deprivation inducing.

Slowly I lift myself up off the bed, using my free hand to support my weight as my hand continues to skitter along the dresser, trying to find that annoying pager of mine, but as my hand gets closer to the vibrations it came into contact not with something bulky and rounded, but a solid, cold, rectangle. It is the cold metal and not the hard plastic that clues me into what I'm actually searching for, my phone. It's the alarm that I'd set to go off at four to so that I would take my antibiotics in time.

A groan escaped me as I collapse back onto my bed, the pillow top of the mattress far to comfortable and welcoming to my tired and exhausted body. All I wanted to do is curl up and go back to sleep, escaping from the world of cold darkness and back into my cocoon of warmth.

"Lauren!" An annoyed voice yell from the outside of my door, followed by hard quick knocks on the door. "Would you turn off your goddamn alarm? Some of us need sleep you know!"

There's Tamsin, without her post wake-up coffee, a real ray of sunshine first thing in the morning she is.

A growl comes from the other side of the door before it's unceremoniously yanked open, revealing an irate Tamsin. There's light from the hallway shinning in from behind her, making it look as if she's emerging from the fires of hell, the entire front of her body shrouded in shadows from the darkness of my bedroom. But she's dressed in possibly the least threatening pyjamas I've ever seen her in.

Dancing ice-cream cone pyjama pants I realize, as I desperately try to hold back the laughter bubbling up within me. I've seen Ciara wandering around in those before a few times, I think, that is when Ciara doesn't steal one of Tamsin's old T-shirts.

Unfortunately when Tamsin tries to glower over me the laughter that I've been trying to repress escapes from my lips, a few giggles as first before it slowly evolves into full-blown laughter.

"Have you gone crazy already?" Tamsin asks me.

"Did you forget to look in the drawers before you took out pyjamas again? Or were you just to tired to care?" I manage to get out between fits of laughter.

"What the hell are you talking about Scrubs?"

"Look down." I snort out, as I try to calm myself down, only before I burst into another fit of laughter at the disbelieving groan that escapes from Tamsin's mouth. The pyjamas really did not suit Tamsin at all. They are probably the furthest thing from intimidating that I can think of, especially on Tamsin.

"I'm wearing the dancing ice-cream cone pants again right?"

I nod before I burst out in laughter again.

Another growl escape from her before I hear the thuds of her footsteps crossing the room towards me, the angry thump they made against the floor only muffled by the carpeting on the ground. Reaching over I use the hand that's resting on my nightstand to turn on the bedside lamp. The expression on Tamsin's face contort as her eyebrows are drawn together, her eyes widening before a slight smirk appeared on her lips, and a snickering laughter begin to escape from her mouth.

"Huh?" I ask looking at Tamsin. What'd made her go from her normal grumpy morning self and turn her into a laughing mess?

"Your face!" She says, her voice thick with mirth and controlled laughter.

"What about it?"

"You look like…" She couldn't finish the sentence as she burst out laughing at me. Reaching over I grab the still vibrating and beeping phone and unlocked it, turning the alarm off in the process.

Quickly I tapped on the phone app and switched it over to the front facing camera. And I couldn't help but snicker a bit when I see myself. I fell asleep on my pager again, to tired to realize that the hard plastic device had been underneath me as I fell asleep, I note as I stare at the impression of front side of the pager that is now pressed into my face, the indentations thick and prominent. Sighing I quickly get myself out of bed and walk over to my dresser. Pulling out an actual pyjama top I trudge over to the bathroom, quickly closing the door behind me, one of my hands reaching out to turn the bathroom light on.

"Come on Laur, it doesn't look that bad!" Tamsin calls out from the other side of the door.

She's replies between boughs of laughter. Shaking my head I pull my scrub top over my head, folding it neatly and placing it on the counter next to the sink. I'll have to put it in with the matching pants so that I can put them in the wash later today, before I go and meet Bo.

Looking down at my bandaged wrist I sigh as the familiar feeling of nervousness settles into the pit of my stomach. I can't help but wonder what it'll feel like to see her again. If I will feel the same pull, that same magnetism I felt towards her the first time we met.

The one that drew me so close to her and didn't want to let go of me. I can already feel something for her starting to grow in me, despite the fact that I barely know her.

Sighing I tear my eyes away from my wrist as I reached over and pulled the short-sleeve pyjama shirt over my head. Pulling the scrub top off of the counter I reached over and opened the door, turning the lights off in the process.

I see Tamsin lying down over the covers on the side of my bed, the one that's hers when she decided she wants it to be. It actually had been hers for a while when we'd shared a bed most nights back in university, Tamsin to heavy for me to put to bed by myself when she came home drunk.

"You staying in here?" I ask as I walk over to my backpack, which is sitting on the ground next to the door. Kneeling down I reach out to undo the side pocket that holds my antibiotics before I open the main part and grab my heavy, blue, plastic container of water.

"You know how Ciara is if she get's woken up. Especially so close to our alarm going off."

"You mean how you're both monsters without your coffee?" I tease as I zip the bag closed.

"I'm better then Ciara!" Tamsin mutters indignantly

Shaking my head I quietly popped the antibiotic into my mouth before I swallowed it with a gulp of water. Honestly they were both equally horrible without coffee.

I make a face at the taste of the antibiotic as is went down my throat. Shaking my head I glance down at the little bottle of evil.

Only two more days and then I would be done the spawn of the devil. The useful spawn of the devil, but still the spawn of the devil.

"Lauren?" I glance over at Tamsin as I set the antibiotics down on my nightstand along with the bottle of water I used them for. Ready for the next time that I wake-up and have to take them.

"What is it?" I ask as I yawn, my tired body beginning to complain when it realizes how little sleep it has been allowed to get as of late.

"Today's the day that you meet Bo again isn't it?" Glancing over at Tamsin I nod, confused as to why she's asking me about that of all things. Tamsin has known about that since the day we had planned it.

"Why do you ask now of all times Tamsin?"

Tamsin sighs, her eyes moving to stare at the wall near her side of the bed, refusing to met my gaze.

She sighs as she began to twiddle her thumbs. "I just… I don't know how to…"

"Tamsin?" I try gently as I walk over to sit down on her side of the bed. Did something happen with Ciara while I was asleep?

The odds were low, they bicker and have small fights often, but the explosive ones were few and far between, and they've been getting along well lately. Or… she mentioned Bo and me meeting her for the first, well maybe it's really the second time, if you counted talking for a minute and then collapsing and passing out a first encounter.

"Tamsin?" I try again, calling her name gently, reaching out to grab one of her hands. "What is it?"

She sighs again, her hand squeezing mine as her gaze turned back towards mine, her eyes wide and watery as they meet my own, and that's all I needed to know.

"It'll be okay." I mumble as I reached over to pull her into a hug. Even after all this time she still wonders about that sometimes I guess. "I'm not going to walk out this time and I certainly won't forget about you."

I pull back gently and shake my head, reaching up to wipe away the tears that have gathered in the corner of her eyes with my thumb.

"You're my best friend." She whispers, her voice breaking as tears escape from her eyes. I smile gently as I pull her close to me and maneuver us so that we're lying down on my bed. Wrapping one of my arms around her waist I pull her to me lightly, not enough for us to touch but enough for her to know that i'm there.

"What'll Ciara think when she sees us snuggled up like this do you think?"

She snickers as her head comes to rest against my shoulder, her body curling closer to my own. Her voice cracks as she speaks. "Probably angry. Although that might be because I stole her favourite pyjamas not that I'm in here with you again."

"Remember that one time she found us passed out half-naked in here?"

It would seem the awkward and embarrasing memory does the trick as Tamsin begins to laugh, burying her head in my shoulder to hide her smile. "That was the time we both ended up so drunk we thought we that trying to sleep together would be a good idea right?"

I laugh at the memory of the next morning, although it certainly hadn't been funny at the time, it became hilarious to me in retrospect as I'd watched a hung-over Tamsin trying to reason with an irate Ciara.

"That was the morning that you two kissed for the first time wasn't it?" I ask as I try to remember if that was the morning that Tamsin had kissed Ciara in order to shut up her angry ranting, or if it was the time her and Ciara had gotten into their first major argument as "friends".

"Yeah that was it. It was back when she was sleeping on the couch right? Because her douche of an ex had kicked her out."

"Whatever happened to him?"

"I kicked his ass when I found out why he had kicked her out."

"It was because he thought she was cheating on him with you right?"

"Yeah. And because he thought that our marks matched and he was raging at the idea of losing Ciara to me because 'just because she _might_ be your soulmate.' Idiot never met his match obviously."

I couldn't help but raise my eyebrow as I shift down so that I could look her in the eye. "You never mention that part of the story before."

"I couldn't Scrubs. Whether I like it or not, it's impossible to explain because it's so hard to find words to explain what happens when you meet that one special person for the first time."

"It feels… magnetic." I mumble.

"Exactly and up until know I didn't know if you would ever get your mark or not, and the experience isn't exactly something that you can describe."

"And after everything that happened with Katherine…"

"Yeah." I was never someone who had really believed in the marks and the supposed connection they brought. I'd seen the manifestations before, watching Tamsin and Ciara together, but it wasn't something that I ever expected to see or feel. It's fascinating and scary, but in a strange way it's poetic because the one time I was with Bo it felt _right_ in a way I can't even hope to begin to describe.

"I get it." I mumble as I prop myself up on my elbow.

"What do you get exactly?"

"Why you and Ciara stayed together despite the fact that you disagree on almost everything." It isn't exactly something I ever understood, they got along well when didn't argue, but at times I wondered just how compatible they are, although now I think I understand it a little more.

"You get that same feeling when you're with her huh?" I nod as I lay back down, allowing my body to sag into the bed.

"I can be pretty much 100% certain about Bo given that…"

"Your mark manifested in fire and blood? Yeah. It's a little hard to get anymore certain then that Laur."

"But you and Ciara have never had the scan to check for sure that your marks match have you."

She shrugs nonchalantly in response. "Sometimes you just have to trust your gut, because I can tell you that when you know, you know. How do you think they did it for the hundred years after the marks got harder to read and tell apart and before computers got powerful enough to scan them and match them?"

I shrug. "I guess I just prefer science and knowing for sure."

"And this is one time I think that I'll trust my heart instead."

I yawn as I curl into Tamsin's warmth. It feels nice to have another person in bed with me again, even if it isn't exactly the person who I'd like at the moment.

"Hey Lauren?"

"What is it?" I yawn as I reach out and flick the lamp off.

"Do you want me to drive you to the park tomorrow to meet her?"

I don't know if she can see my smile in the dark, but if she can then she should already know the answer but just in case I reach out and grab her hand gently, as I squeeze it with both of my own and reply. "That would be amazing."

* * *

Slowly I take my first steps into the park. My nervousness buzzes through me, giving me far extra energy and no outlet through which to channel it, and there's also a feeling of anticipation, my constant companion throughout the day as I had struggled to get ready.

"Scrubs!" Tamsin shouts from behind me. Turning around I see her standing there, a genuine smile on her face. "Good luck."

Laughing I wave at her and shake my head before gesturing for her to go and leave me alone. "I'll be fine Tamsin."

"You sure you don't need me to stay?"

Laughing I walk over to her I turn her around and begin to shove her in the direction of our car. "You need to get home."

"Lauren…" I hear her whisper and something in her voice makes me stop pushing her in the direction of the car.

As soon as I lift my hands away from her leather jacket she turns around and grabs me in a fierce hug, the surprise causing me to freeze. She's never been one to initiate hugs with anyone but Ciara.

"Are you sure that you don't want me to stay with you Lauren?" She whispers in my ear. I nod as my arms come up wrap around her waist, and rest on her back, pulling her closer to me.

"Thank-you Tamsin. Thank-you…" I mutter as I pull back, smiling in gratitude for what she has done for me today but no matter how much I want her to be here with me I need to do this alone. So I slap her lightly on the arm, and laugh at her.

She frowns at my response, her eyebrows rising in confusion before she shoves me away, a familiar smirk settling on her lips. "Let me know if I need to kick her ass 'kay?"

I smile and laugh nodding, there's the Tamsin I know, I think as I shove her in the direction of the car again. "I will okay?"

Her hand wraps my own, and silently I squeeze her it before I shove her off towards the car.

"Go!" I yell as I shove her towards the parking lot again.

Tamsin hesitates for a minute, the muscles in her back tense as if she is trying to prevent herself from looking backward, and checking to see if I'm alright.

I smile and force myself to take a breathe as I begin to walk back towards the gated entrance to the park.

As I enter the main park I glance around, trying to find Bo in the central park of the city, but I'm hard going to have a hard time trying to find a brunette in the sea of people that have come out today, most of them likely trying to enjoy one of the last warm weekends for the year. The temperature is going to begin to drop soon, rapidly as summer turns into winter. As I walk forward I could have swear that I catch site of a brunette sitting on a bench under one of the big pine trees. Walking forward more quickly, dodging in and out of individuals and small groups I'm about to call out when I catch site of the brunette's face.

Oh no…

I hold my breath as I take a few more steps forward, trying to confirm what I'm hoping against all hope isn't true. I continue to walk forward, the person's face and clothing becoming less and less blurry with each step that I take towards her, until finally her face comes fully into profile. A chill run down my spin as I catch sight of the familiar haircut, the dark-blue button-up shirt that she's wearing, the brown slacks. I can't recognize the glasses that sat perched on the bridge of her nose, but I do recognize the style, they were the only kind that have ever looked good on her. Slowly, I begin to back up, trying to get myself lost in the hustle and bustle of the people around me. I know that if she sees me she will try to come over and talk, try to explain herself and what had happened. We'd done this dance two or three times before today, but I can't face her.

I still can't face her even after this time. I…

The thought of even having to try to talk to her caused tears to well up in my eyes as the memory of that day came back far more brightly and vividly then I would ever like to experience.

Glancing back over at Katherine the crowd around between her and I thins out, revealing to me that she's holding the hand of the dark-haired woman sitting next to her. I don't recognize her but her build slight and lithe, that must be Natalie, the woman who Katherine left me for all that time ago, I recognize her from the description that Tamsin gave me. I've never actually seen her before now, and grudgingly I have to admit that she's beautiful, high-pointed nose and sharp cheekbones, and what looked like beautiful blue eyes all framed by shoulder length dark hair. She's certainly stunning, and most definitely Katherine's type. I want to stare at them a little longer, to see what exactly had provoked Katherine to leave me for her but… I sigh and shake my head.

What would be the point?

This is _my_ chance to start over again, to try and put the horrible scars memories that Katherine left me with, and to try and finally begin to move on from that place that her memory seemed far to intent to drag me back to. I forced myself to take a breathe and bring my hand up to wipe away the tears that've gathering in the corners my eyes. Now's not the time to begin to cry over her again. I'm going to be meeting Bo soon, and I need to go and try to find our meeting place, I couldn't get distracted by my ex and her soulmate. That's the last thing I want or need, I'm going to meet Bo properly today, after weeks of texting back and forth, finally.

I smiled as I reached down and pulled out my phone, quickly unlocking it and pulling up my messages.

_Cant wait to meet u! So excited Lo!_

_See u soon Lauren. :)_

_Hopefully you don't pass don't this time._

I had responded to that last one with a stuck out tongue. Of course she chose to bring that up, instead of leaving it alone. I quickly move around the park and try to find my way to a place that Tamsin had down me a long time ago, one that Katherine did not know about.

"Lauren?" I hear a curious, familiar voice call out. Without even looking back I quickly begin to walk away, my eyes continuing to scan the crowd as I search for Bo, hoping that if Katherine sees me with her she'll think that she's mistaken me for someone else.

The ploy had worked before with Ciara, although that may have simply been Katherine not wanting to see me either given that it had only been weeks after she had left.

Quickly I glance backward, trying to see what's going on behind me, through the gaps in the crowd I can see my ex walking towards me, a determined expression of her face. Gulping I quickly begin to walk as fast as I can without running, try to walk further into the thick of the crowds, if I can get lost in them maybe she'll leave me alone. Unfortunately when I look back I can see her continuing to follow me, almost chasing me at this point.

Glancing around, my eyes scanning the crowd as I try to make my way towards the bathrooms when I catch sight of someone whose face I will never forget. I feel myself beginning to slow my pace down as I take in the picture of Bo, taking in her breath-taking beauty, the looks that capture my attention even from this far away distance. I can feel a tug in the pit my stomach, the nervousness of the moment taking over me, my heart pounding as I swallow, my throat becoming dry. I can also feel a different tug, one from deep within my heart, my soul, urging me to go towards her, to allow myself to be completed by her presence. There's a heat building up within me, a fire slowly coming to life from deep within my soul, in her beauty as the distance between us is slowly closed.

"Lauren!" I hear Katherine calls out again, her tone one that I can't quite identify, but whatever it is snaps me out of the trance that seeing Bo has placed me in. I gulp as I glance backward at Katherine before my eyes drift over to Bo again, drawn to her as if she were a magnet. I want so badly to go to her, but I can't. I glance backward and see a large crowd of people have blocked Katherine's path to me. I can see her trying to find her way around them and as I realized the opportunity being afforded to me I take the chance offered to me and take off in a run.

I'm not ready to face her yet, and I can't bear the thought of dragging Bo into the mess that is my past. I don't want our first meeting tainted by the appearance my ex-girlfriend and her soulmate because despite what we our to each other my first impression had already been… unique. Our first formal meeting doesn't need to end with a talk from my determined ex.

"Lauren!" Bo calls out when she spots me, her eyes lighting up with happiness that I'm about to destroy.

"Bo." I mumble to myself as I glance to the side quickly, a look of what seems to be worry on her face. I swallow heavily as I turn my head back to the blurring park around me. I can feel the confused stares of the people I pass in my frantic dash towards the bathroom.

If I can just…

I feel my phone vibrate on my hip as I run towards the bathrooms.

I can very easily guess what the text message says, but at the moment I can't bring myself to care, my fight-or-flight instinct fully active.

I _need_ to get away from Katherine.

I catch sight of a concrete and brick building a few meters away from me and I couldn't help but laugh in relief when I see the building. My eyes leap left and right as I scan between the building trying to find the pathway that leads to the more secluded part of the park that Tamsin had shown me once when we had come here years ago.

I glance back once again, the crowd of people between her and I have yet to dissipate.

This is my only chance and I have to take it.

As I reached the building I turn to the left before I quickly turn right again when I catch sight of the old red brick path that Tamsin and Ciara had "shown" me as I was dragged along to play mediator on one of their dates. Quickly I take off down the path, the grey of the low cinderblock walls on either side blurring together with the green and brown of the trees as I continue to run. My lungs begin to burn painfully, and my heart is races in my chest, pounding in my ears as my lungs burn, unable to get sufficient oxygen.

But finally I caught sight of what I've been looking for, a small pathway that lead off the main trail.

Turning to the left I slow down as I continue to jog down the path until I came to a halt near the entrance to a circular clearing, with a fountain in the centre surrounded by wooden benches. Slowly walking over to a hidden area near the entrance I sit, well flop really, down on the ground next to a bench.

I leaned my forehead against the cool metal of the armrest as I panted trying to catch my breath. It has been probably a decade since I've run like that. Shifting I groan when the pain in my legs let me know that I pushed the muscles far beyond their limits.

"What am I going to do know?" I spoke aloud to myself as I panted. I forced my legs to cross so that they weren't sticking out from behind the bench despite the painful protests that the muscles gave.

I glance around the clearing, but despite the beauty in front of me all I can feel is anger boiling up within me.

"Why?" I growl out.

Why is it far that every time something seems to be going my way something else in my life comes along and ruins what little happiness I've managed to find for myself?

"Argh." I growl out in frustration before I force myself to take a breath and calm down. What good is it doing to be angry? None I guess, but I still can't help but feel the anger bubble within me, as a deep self-loathing takes a hold within me.

Why am I such a coward?! Why can't I just face her instead of running _every time_ I see her. Why is it that when things get bad I run! Always burning the bridges behind me, cutting off my old life...

I shake my head and force myself to take another breathe. Thinking about the past will do me no good. It won't do me any good at all, not right now.

I sigh as I pull out my phone quickly sliding to the unlock screen before I can read the message on it.

Typing in my password I can feel some apprehension twist in my gut as well as a small amount of curiosity.

I can see the little red circle containing a one as my screen appears, but as my thumb hovers over the message before I close my eyes and before I can hesitate I tap on the icon, opening the message.

 _What the hell was that Lauren?!_ She's texted me. I close my eyes as I pull up the keyboard, typing out two simple words.

_I'm sorry._

I press the send button before I stop myself. Quickly closing the app I switch over to the e-reader application on my phone.

Might as well make use of the hiding time to study.

I can't help but grumble when I see the only book that's still stored in the app is one I haven't needed since first year medical school. I allow my thumb to drift down from the screen, pressing against the button that would close the app for a moment before hesitating and sighing as my thumb drifts over and taps on the little book icon and I settle into reading over my gross anatomy text-book from medical school.

* * *

I can feel my mouth twitch slightly as I read over the section on eyeballs.

Closing my eyes I shudder a little as the memory of _that_ _day_ came to mind. It may have been a funny story to tell afterwards but at the time it's not an experience that I ever want to live through again.

Quickly closing the e-reader app I glance at the clock on the main-screen of my smartphone.

It's been almost half an hour.

That should be more than enough time for Katherine to have searched through the park and realized she isn't going to find me. She would simply give up if she realizes that the search is futile, she always has given up when she realized something is pointless, and I doubt that this situation will be any different.

Sighing I reach out to grab the arm rest of the park bench I've been sitting next to for the past half an hour and pull myself up. Stumbling on weak legs I grip the bench firmly as I try to regain my footing, my legs stiff with cold from sitting on the paving stones for the last thirty minutes. Slipping my smartphone back into the holder clipped to my belt I slowly and awkwardly began to walk towards the entrance to the clearing, moving slowly down the uneven, unkept, path.

I stop for a moment, leaning against a tree when my legs threaten to give out on me, staring up at the sky as I do so. It's a beautiful sight, the horizon turning orange from the fading sun, the fading disk casting long shadows on the area between the canopy of tree tops that its ray could creep through. It would be an even more beautiful sight to see if I could get through the foliage and stare at it without the leaves interrupting the light.

Weakly I push myself up off the tree and begin to walk again, taking my time and trying to savour what little peace and quiet I can get because I'll return to my empty apartment. Tamsin would be on night-shift now and Ciara doesn't always sleep over if Tamsin isn't home, so the odds are good I'll be returning to an empty apartment and right now I really want to talk to someone about what has happened to me, but I realize I won't be able to. My eyes drift around the landscape in front of me, taking in the the trees and the ways the light reflects off of them, at least this scenery will be something that I'll be able to remember when winter comes around.

I almost let out a whoop of joy when I catch sight of the entrance to the main area of the park.

Dashing forward I squint as I emerge from the relative shade of the area behind me. The sunlight dyes everything beautiful shades of orange and red, with traces of faded yellow mixed in, just as beautiful of a sight as I thought it would be.

Stopping for a minute as I stand in the entrance to the side-path, taking in the simple beauty of the sun setting over the park, and the light that reflects on it over the horizon as the tops of the trees shake, a howling wind blowing through the otherwise quiet park and causing me to shiver violently in the cold breeze.

The leaves will begin to change in earnest soon, winter's darkness is looming on the horizon, her deathly chill already omni-present in the breeze. Soon her grips will envelope this town in her grips, one that will not be broken until summer comes and releases us from her cold hands. But for now at least I can enjoy the colours of the fall leaves, before the pure white of the freshly fallen snow covers everything within its reach in a wet, cold coating that would not melt fully until late April or early May.

I smile as I glance at the sunset at least not everything changes, the one constant in this town is .

Slowly my eyes sweep over the park. It's almost deserted now, not a person in sight. It's also positively silent here the happy shrieks of playing children, and the din of their talking parents is gone, leaving this place hauntingly silent, mere echoes of the joy experienced during the day, present during the nighttime. When I step further into the main area of the park however I do catch sight of another person, a brunette, leaning against one of the big, old, trees nearby. Her back is turned to me, long hair flowing gracefully down her back and over a brown leather jacket, hiding some of it from view. I smile contently as I continue to walk towards the exit of the park, leaving the other person to enjoy their solitude, however just as I approach the gate to the exit I feel another person looking at me. My footsteps must have caught her attention because when I turn around to catch her eyes I see what looks like a familiar face, her eyes moving to meet mine. Slowly I take a few more steps forward, trying to get her face to come into focus, her features to arrange themselves into more then the blurry mass they are now.

"Lauren?" Bo's voice, confirming what I'm seeing with my eyes. The familiar tone of her voice as she called out my name spreading warmth through me. "Lauren!"

The shock that run through my body is chilling, holding me in place as I mouth her name before I repeat it aloud, calling out to her in return. "Bo!"

She nods her head once and and that's all I need as I walk begin to walk towards her slowly, unable to believe that this is real. But as I continue to cross the park, as her body comes more and more into focus, my feet begin to hit the cobble stone faster as my speed picks up and before I can stop myself I'm running towards her. My muscles ache in protest as I force them to move at this pace again, pushing them far beyond their limit, but I ignore them, happiness overriding anything else.

Bo begins to move towards me as well, and suddenly we meet in the centre, our standing face to face as we pant, having stopped just short of hugging each other. Her eyes are wide as she reaches out, her hand stopping before it can touch my cheek.

Of all the things and all the clichés that have happened in my life, I never thought that this one could exist outside of the movies, and yet here I am. This is almost to perfect in far to many ways. Perchance to a dream? Maybe the blood loss is causing me to begin to hallucinate again.

But then I see that hand moves those final centimetres as she takes a breathe. Her palm come to press against my cheek, her skin warm against the cool air that has started to come in as the sun began to set. I see the wide disbelieving smile tugging at her lips as her beautiful brown eyes bore into my own, as if she's trying to see into the very depths of my soul. Without even thinking I move my arms to wrap around her waist, pulling our bodies flush against each others, her warmth exuding from her through her clothes, as I try to press myself as close to her as possible. Her thumb continues stroking my cheek, slowly, almost reverently, as something within her eyes changed, almost as if she realized that this is real, that I'm real. Just as she is real, here and solid in my arms, her body pressed flush against mine.

This feels… _right_.

The magnetism I felt in her presence is gone, the force of attraction that drew me to her, replaced by this feeling I couldn't describe, this warmth and this certainty, a sense of belonging and of trust. It's absurd yet it's intoxicating.

"Lauren…" Bo whispers again, pulling me back into the real world and slowly my I lift my gaze upward, our eyes locking as we stare at each other. I can't help but smile at what I see as I lean a little closer to her, something pulling me to be as close to her as I can be, and soon we are only centimetres apart, as I feel her warm breath against my lips for the first time.

I feel something within me shift as something overtakes me, and slowly but surely I lean in as my eyes begin to drift closed as I press my lips to hers. The first touch of her lips against mine is electric, sending small sparks through my body as I press myself as close to her as possible. I can feel my heart pounding against my chest, the beat echoing joyously in my ears, singing the ancient song of completion, as I press my lips greedily against hers in a heavy kiss. I wonder if she can feel my heart pounding in my chest, the one that already seems to belong to her.

But all to soon this feeling has to come to an end as my lungs began to burn for oxygen, what little I'm getting through my nose proving, sadly inadequate I pull away, panting heavily I lean my forehead against hers, as I see her eyes flutter open, a beautiful smile on at her lips as she pulls me close to her.

"Hi." She whispers breathlessly into my ear, the warmth of her breath tickling my ears as she does so.

"Hi." I mumble as I lean into her once again, our mouths meeting again as the last whispers of sunlight sank below the horizon.

* * *


	5. Chapter 5

"Lauren…" Bo breathes out as she pulls away from me. Smiling I lean my forehead against hers as I pant trying to catch my breath from the incredible kiss that we had just shared.

"Bo." I breath out in response. "That was..."

"Incredible?" She sighs as she presses kisses to the side of my face, her arms pulling me tightly against her body to the point there is no more space between us.

"You're here, you're fine. God…" She breaths into my ear before pulling back enough to let me see the exuberant and relieved smile on tugging at her lips. "I'm so glad to finally see you, and hey you haven't passed out yet!"

Laughing I lean in to kiss her briefly on the lips before I pull back again, enough to let me see her face and that beautiful smile of hers, but not enough to separate us. I'm not ready to let go of her just yet, the reality of what is happening only now beginning to set in, as the magnitude of the changes my life is about to undergo dawn on me.

Everything is changing, and yet it is also staying the same. I had met my soulmate but I ran away from my ex, who left me more then a year ago.

But here Bo is.

"You stayed…" I whisper as I'm suddenly overcome with disbelief, the rush from meeting her here properly for the first time finally wearing off. I couldn't help but feel embarrassed at my actions earlier.

"I'm sorry." I whisper as I lean forward again pressing a kiss to her cheek.

"For running away from me? I know I'm good-looking but I didn't think that I was a goddess." I snicker as I shake my head getting the reference to Greek mythology. Before frowning at the self-deprecating smile creeping onto her lips as she tries to brush the situation off with a joke.

I would have opened my mouth to speak but a few seconds later her facial expression hardens almost imperceptibly and the arms that are still holding me to her tighten their grip on my waist, it is almost possessive, the way that she is holding me now.

Moving my hands I began to run them up and down her back, the smooth leather of the jacket cool to the touch and soft under my fingers. The muscles in her back are tense, but slowly they begin to relax under my hands as I continue to run them up and down her spine. I could feel a longing in my heart, to feel her skin against mine, but for now I quash it, we barely know each other.

Eventually I do feel Bo relax completely, her head coming to rest against my shoulder, warm breath tickling my ear and the skin of my neck, sending a small shiver of pleasure down my spine. We continue to stand there, not speaking, the question she wants to ask hanging in between us in a heavy silence.

"What was that, why were you running?" She whispers in my ear, her voice soft, and filled with _something_ I couldn't place, or perhaps I didn't want to. This conversation is beginning to strike me as far more intimate than it should be, but instead of scaring me like it should have, it made me feel warm for a moment before another wave of embarrassment hit me.

I gulp as I break eye-contact with Bo, my gaze moving so that I am glancing down at the paving stones just over her shoulder.

"Honestly? I don't know." I whisper

"Then why? What did she do?" Bo mumbles as she presses a kiss to my neck, her hands moving from my waist to my back, her fingers warm and splayed open in an subconscious attempt at comfort. Her head moves until she can look me in the eye, but as soon as our gazes meet I cast mine down to the floor. I can't meet her eye right now, but she doesn't let me look away for long, her nose bumping my cheek lightly until my gaze flicks over to meet her own.

"What happened huh? What was that?" She whispers in my ear, pressing another kiss to my cheek. This is crossing so many boundaries I don't even know where to begin, but it all felt... right. Was this how Tamsin felt when she was with Ciara?

How everyone felt when they were with their soulmate?

God...

Everything wants to come tumble out of my mouth, every single story and every single syllable of those stories that I could think of. They all just want to spring from my mouth, to let her into every detail of my life before her, and every hope and dream of a future with her that is quickly forming in my mind. I could feel her breath against my lips again, her forehead pressing against mine, her eyes staring into my own as if she is searching for something in them, and there is something reflecting in hers that I couldn't describe.

An emotion?

A thought?

A memory?

I didn't know, I couldn't place it.

"Lauren..." Bo quietly speaks in my ear, her voice thick with something, desire perhaps?, and low. Shivering I am pulled back from my thoughts and into the reality of where I am and the delicious things Bo is doing to my body without even really touching me.

"Uum…" I speak as I pull back from the embrace she held me in, needing the distance to talk, so that thoughts of her and her body did not cloud my mind, and she is not flooding my senses with the comfort that her embrace offered. "It's complicated, it's one huge complicated mess that I don't want to drag you into, and I really don't want to ruin tonight by talking about my ex because I just want to make a good impression and I'm sorry Bo, about everything that happened, and running away from you like a teenager, and... I'm rambling aren't I?"

Bo laughs as she presses a kiss to my forehead before shifting her body weight and pulling me against her again. I sigh and let out a content murmur, surprising even myself by how comfortable I feel in her arms.

"How about we put a bookmark in this and talk about it another time? I don't want to hear about your ex's as much as you don't want to talk about them. Well… just don't run away from me again alright?" She says, her voice low but with an edge of hardness to it. I could tell from the tone that if I ran from her again it would not be so easily forgiven.

I murmur nodding my agreement, and allowing my head to rest against her shoulder. I _will_ tell her later on, when it's time and when this, whatever this is, isn't so new and fragile.

Taking a breath I slot my own arms between hers and her body, wrapping them around her waist and pulling her to me closing the small space that had been between our bodies before, reveling in the feel of her body against mine.

Her hands moving up and down my back, even through the layers of clothing between us they leave a trail of fire in their wake. I am suddenly overcome with the urge to kiss her again, and slowly I do, angling my head upward, catching the skin of her lower lip between my teeth before I press my lips to hers in a sensual kiss. Bo let out a growl before the arms that have moved to wrap around my waist tighten, pressing our chests together as she slips one of her legs between mine.

Drawing my lower lip in between hers she nips at it before sucking on it, causing me to let out a moan. The arms wrapped around me slowly descend lower leaving a trail of sparks where she touches me, her hands eventually settling possessively on my hips, pulling me body into hers even more.

A moan escapes me when her thigh slips fully between mine. This is getting far to heated for such a public place, but as Bo pulls me to rest against her thigh I can't help the moan escaping from me, as all thought suddenly vanishing when it hits the right spot in the seam of my jeans.

"Oh god." I moan when Bo briefly breaks the kiss before she leans back down, capturing my lips in another heated caress of her lips against mine.

"Ahem?" I hear someone clear their throat, but it sounds fuzzy and vague, and Bo quickly draws my attention back to her when she nips at my lower lip again, an annoyed sound escaping from her at my lack of response. I growl before taking her lower lip between mine and suck on it again, causing her to let out a moan.

"BoBo!" A woman calls out causing Bo to break the kiss with an annoyed grumble before pressing a quick peck to my lips and breaking the embrace that she'd held me in.

I shiver, feeling cold as the temperature around me drops rapidly and the pleasant feeling of Bo holding me fades.

"What do you want Kenzi?" She snaps annoyed as she walks over to someone leaning against a tree. I squint and try to make her out, but the area she is standing in is to dark to get a good look at her.

"Mad I interrupted your hot and heavy make-out with the blondie over there? I'm sorry but did you forget that your in a park and supposed to be meeting your soulmate!"

Bo grumbles something that causes the shadowed woman to laugh. "You going to introduce me or what?"

I could hear Bo sigh again as she walks over towards me, being pulled by a black-haired woman.

"Lauren this is Kenzi, my best friend and roommate. Kenzi this is Lauren, the woman I told you about." I stare and blink at the tiny woman in front of me. She looks young, younger than Bo and I are.

If I have to guess I would say late-teens or early twenties? The most startling about her though is her resemblance to Natalie, but the young woman in front of me looks much younger than Natalie is.

And then I realize who this is. The roommate with the shoe obsession that had led to Bo and I meeting for the first time.

"Thank-you." I suddenly blurt out. "For leaving your shoes out."

Kenzi balks at me, the look in her eyes betraying the fact that I must have already made a horrible first impression. Who thanks someone for sending their roommate to the hospital?

Stupid!

To be fair without Kenzi sending Bo to the hospital, I would never have met her in the first place.

My suddenly sticky and wet wrist reminds me I would also have to go and change my bloody bandage again soon. Reaching down I rub my wrist slightly trying to ascertain whether or not the mark is bleeding again or if it's simply oozing as it has taken to doing over the past day.

"You're seriously thanking me for sending my bestie to the hospital? Do you have some weird thing for blood or something?"

I quickly shake my head. "No. No. I wouldn't have met her if you hadn't left your shoes out that night." I turn towards Bo. "Did you not tell her that we met for the first time while I was treating you?"

Kenzi's eyes move towards Bo, a skeptical look in them. "Didn't you say that some bald dude treated you. What's his name? Dr. Neil?"

"Dr. Nelson." Bo and I automatically say together. Glancing over at her I raise an eyebrow in surprise that she remembers his name.

"I have to see him in a few days to get the stitches removed." She mumbles as she tilts her head to the side a series of small brown Band-Aids come into view exactly where I remember the laceration on her forehead being.

"How's it healing?" I ask, pausing for a moment before Bo nods her consent for me to touch. I reach up to run my fingers lightly over the bandage Bo wincing a little when I touch the first bandage lightly, but otherwise remains silent. I can feel the slightly raised bumps of the stitching through the thin pads of the Band-Aids, but there aren't any signs of the actual stitches showing through.

"Can you tilt you're head towards the light for me Bo?" I ask wanting to get a closer look at the bandages on her forehead.

"Ever the doctor aren't you Lauren?" She reply in a light flirty tone as she tilts her head towards the streetlights near us, that had blinked on as the sun set. The artificial light casts a long shadow over Bo's face as she tilts the injured side of her forehead towards the light.

Reaching up again I run my fingers lightly over the Band-Aids. I nod in satisfaction when I do not see any traces of blood underneath the bandage, as well as the seeming lack of redness or swelling. "Looks good no signs of blood."

Smiling at Bo my hand drifts down her cheek lightly, my thumb moving to touch Bo's lips softly. I feel them move, parting slightly as she took in a sharp breath, causing my finger come into contact with her teeth for a moment before Bo's expression shifts into a smirk.

"Anything else you would like to see?" She asks, her voice going up slightly as she flirts with me.

"I can think of a few things." I reply, a flirty smile tugging at my lips as I run my eyes up and down her body. There are several things in fact I note as my eyes linger on her chest, the swell of her breasts plainly visible through her shirt, my hand moving to run down her neck, lingering for a moment at her collarbone, before it begins to migrate further down her sternum.

"Ehhem." I quickly pull my hand away from where it has began to drift down towards Bo's chest, my cheeks begin to burn in embarrassment. I have forgotten that Kenzi is present, becoming lost in Bo and ignoring the world around me.

Bo blinks once, twice, three times before she shakes her head and her gaze drifts in the direction to where Kenzi is standing. Smiling again, one that appears to be her embarrassed smile. "Sorry Kenz. Lauren and I…"

"Save it BoBo. I do _not_ want to know what is going on in that XXX rated mind of yours."

"Oh Lauren.." Bo whispers her gaze having drifted down towards the hand that had been touching her moments before.

Quickly realizing which wrist I have exposed I pull it back, tugging the sleeve over the bandage. "It's nothing to worry about Bo, really."

I can feel Bo's hand grab mine lightly, turning it over, and allowing it to rest against the soft warm skin of her palms, as she cradles my hand in both over her own. One part of the white gauze pad, tinged pink with blood, is showing through my shirtsleeve. "It's still bleeding?"

"Who's bleeding!" I hear Kenzi call out immediately afterward. Turning my head around I see the wide panicked look in her eye.

Oh no.

Bo roll her eyes before she smiles fondly at Kenzi. "You remember how I told you what happened the night I met Lauren right?"

Kenzi nods her head once, the rest of her body seemingly having gone stiff with panic.

"And the second time right?" Kenzi nods again.

"This is just a side effect. It happens sometimes, I've been told about it before in my research." I glance at Bo once skeptically before I remember the paper that I had come across, her master's thesis.

"I know… it's an uncommon thing but there are cases of this in the medical literature." I pipe in. The only thing Kenzi does is stick out her tongue before shuddering in her very expensive shoes.

"Already went through the bleeding at sixteen sister. I cannot imagine having that thing bleed for more then one night."

"Well not everyone get's that experience." I grumble as my gaze drifts upwards towards the night sky. It is a beautiful night, the stars are shinning brighter then usual on this cloudless night although they are still dimmed by the artificial of the town, but so much more visible than when I had lived in the city.

"Kenzi? What are you doing here anyway?"

"You said you'd meet me at the Dal."

"Oh Kenz I'm sorry I forgot. I was waiting for Lauren and I must have lost track of time."

Smiling gently I press one of my hands to her shoulder squeezing it lightly before gently pushing her towards Kenzi. "You have plans go. We can meet up another time."

"But..." Bo protests.

"Go." I say again, smiling and trying to encourage her to go."

Turning back to Kenzi she begins to explain. "I am so so sorry Kenz but Lauren and I only just met up, and well we need a little more time... I promise I will spill when I get home okay?"

I can't help but feel guilty for causing this. Bo really should be going to the bar with her friend right now, especially if they have plans. As much as I want to stay here and spend more time with her it isn't far to make her cancel her plans.

But when I look over at the pair of friends they seem to have negotiate a treaty of some sort if their exchange is anything to go by.

"With alcohol?"

Bo laughs as she smiles and nods. "Of course."

"Alright but you tell all sista, but you're mine for the rest of the night!" Kenzi laughs before menacingly adding. "And you will tell all!"

"Got it! Thank-you so so much!" Bo laughs as she shoos Kenzi away.

"Have fun on your date." Kenzi calls out as she begins to walk away.

I can only watch the exchange fascinated as my mind wanders, analyzing how they interact.

"Lauren?"Bo's voice whisper in my ear. Startled, I nearly elbow Bo in the stomach before I can stop myself.

When had she moved behind me?

"Sorry." I say as I turn around, coming face-to-face with the woman who seems to be able to steal my breath away with only a few words.

"It's okay. Kenzi's gone." She murmurs into my ear, the tone from earlier returning.

"So what do you want to do?" I ask, leaning over to whisper it in her own ear.

"There are many things I want to do with you and to you." She murmurs in my ear. Laughing I fell her arms wrap around my waist and pull me into another close embrace. "But for now do you want to walk around the park?"

Nodding I pull back from the hug and reach out to grab Bo's hand. "There's a place that I want to show you. It's beautiful at night."

Or at least it was when I walked through there with Tamsin and Ciara a year ago.

Bo's face light up in another smile before she nods and squeezes my hand. "I would love to see it."

Smiling back I begin to lead her towards the path that I had followed earlier that day as I fled from Katherine. The glow from the streetlights allowing me to see the well-worn stone walkway that lead to the almost invisible side area of the park.

When I glance to the side I briefly meet Bo's studying eyes before I look away. It is as if they are trying to see into me, or perhaps it's because she is looking at her other half, just as I am looking at mine.

It is still surreal concept for me, given that I was told I would never find my soulmate, or that if I did they would already be in the graveyard. My mark would fill in painlessly and bloodlessly in that case, a simple grey pattern would appear signifying to all who care to look that my soulmate was already dead.

"Hey…" Bo whispers as she squeezes our joined hand once again. "Where did you go just now?"

I smile at her before I shake my head. "No where in particular. Just thinking about things."

"What kind of things?"

I laugh before responding. "Do you turn everything into an innuendo?"

"Only when I'm meeting with beautiful blonds."

"Oh really?"

"Yes doctor."

I laugh, shaking my head and marveling at how easy it seems to be to banter with her. It took me almost two years to get this comfortable with Tamsin, and yet here I am talking with Bo like I have known her for years. It feels extraordinary and comforting all at the same time.

Bo smiles again, a look of desire in her eyes, her mouth about to open to ask me something before she stops for a second, simply taking in the sight in front of us. I smile when I catch sight of the area that I had hidden in only a while earlier.

It still amazes me how different this place is during the night as opposed to the day. When the sun is up it seems as if this is just another run down and hidden area of the park, and a particularly unspectacular one at that with only a series of metal benches and a slightly run down fountain as the only attractions in this section.

But at night well...

At night the fountain is lit with a series of spotlights shinning through from the bottom, causing the water to reflect in a multitude of different colours as it pours out from the top. The effect is beautiful, especially this time of year, when the light also reflecting off the changing leaves.

"I cannot believe that this is out here of all place. Why is it even here?"

I shrug my shoulders as I glance over at the fountain again before I lead her over to one of the benches near the opening to the secluded area. "Nobody knows why this is here. But it's here and it's nice area of the park, at least at night."

"Well that I can agree with. But why exactly are you showing me this place doctor?" She asks wiggling her eyebrows.

Laughing I peck her on the lips before I pull back. "Not for the reason that you seem to be thinking."

I could swear that I saw her pout when I say that to her. Laughing again I lean over and press a kiss to her cheek before I turn my gaze back to the fountain in front of me. "There's an old urban legend that says the fountain will only light up like this when a pair of united soul-mates are here."

Bo smiles at me before her eyes lighting up. "That's oddly romantic."

I hum in agreement, content to sit in silence for a minute.

"And it's so quiet here."

I let out a content mumble as I shiver from the cold wind rustling the tree's leaves. Winter will be here soon, I note bitterly.

Shivering again I pull myself closer to Bo, enjoying the heat that her body is giving off, even as the evening chill begins to morph into the air of the nighttime.

"This place really is beautiful." Bo murmurs as I wrap an arm around her shoulders and pull her closer to me. Letting out a content murmur I press a kiss to her forehead as she leans her head against my shoulder, her body curling into my own.

Having her in my arms feels almost as amazing as being held by her, perhaps even better.

For a time we simply sit on the bench, basking in each others warmth as we stare at the fountain as the colours change, strangely it seem to have settled on shades of purple and red, instead of the multi-colour pattern we had seen when we first arrived here. I don't recall it doing this when I was here with Tamsin and Ciara either time, so maybe it's glitching?

Or Maybe there is some truth to that urban legend after all.

Soulmates as a concept are hard enough to explain, and yet we have cave painting of the original marks, much less complex then the ones that cover mine and Bo's wrists, but still marks. It's almost as if they have grown and evolved with time, becoming more complex and more and more human lived and died, the pattern ever changing and ever evolving.

Nobody could explain why they existed, why the vast majority of the human population walk around with marked with a pattern.

So a mystical glowing fountain might not be so out of the ordinary.

Out of the corner of my eye, for a single second I could have sworn I caught sight of that glowing ball that had appeared in my dream those two times, whizzing around almost as if it's happy that we're finally together.

But when I blink again it is gone. I could feel Bo shifting in my arms before she presses a soft kiss to the skin of my neck, shifting to sit upright again. I unwrapped my arm from around her shoulders to allow her to shift upright fully.

"Can we talk for a while?"

"About what?"

"What does the astute Dr. Lewis want to know?"

"Hmm...Would you tell me more about your research?"

"Ever the academic aren't you Dr. Lewis?" She laughs before she smiles again. "Where do you want to start mhhm?"

"Your masters thesis?"

"You mean the one that gave you my full name?" She laughs and I nod my head smiling.

"Well it started with a thought I had in the undergrad that I asked one of my professors about…" She starts.

She continues to ramble on for a while, regaling me with the amusing tale of her years as a Master's student.

But eventually she grew quiet, her voice trailing off as her head tilts upward as she looks upward at the stars. "You know when I started to study soulmate pairs I never thought that I would actually meet my soulmate…"

I glance at her as I wait for her to continue but she doesn't instead her eyes continue to study the stars in the sky. I open my mouth, wanting to say something to break the silence, before I realize that there is no need to. It would only ruin the moment at this point to talk so instead I simply lean back against the bench and tilt my head upward so that I can look at the sky as well. The inky blackness of the night and the little dots of light that are the stars are partially obscured by trees reflecting the light from the fountain, but in a way that makes it all the more beautiful.

Reaching out I find Bo's fingers and intertwine hers with mine, and for a second I simply enjoy the feeling of her skin against my own and the heat that her hand is giving off as a pleasant contrast to the rapidly cooling air. Glancing at her out of the corner of my eye I can see a small smile settle onto her lips. I can't help but wonder what caused her to stop talking, but whatever it is I hope that at least it is a good memory.

Silently I squeeze her hand as I turn my vision back towards the night sky.

Was it just me or did the stars seem to be twinkling just a little brighter then they had been before?

* * *

"Tamsin?" I call out when I hear the door to our apartment open and shut.

"Lauren?" She responds, surprised, although from the sounds of it also dead tired. Had she not expected me to come home last night or something?

Absently I raise a hand in greeting to her as I continue to stare down at the textbook in my lap, and I try to memorize more of it in preparation for one of my many upcoming exams.

The thump of her shoes falling to the ground as the closet door squeaks out it's protests from being opened to quickly pulls me from my textbook again. Glancing up at her I can see that my roommate is still upright, which is all I need to confirm before I return to my book. I need to restudy ultrasound techniques before my next exam...

However seconds later a thump, as if something had hit the wall, pulls me from my textbook once again. Glancing up again I see Tamsin holding a pair of shoes and giving them a death glare, as if it was their fault she had stumbled into the wall in the first place. Shaking my head I sigh as I return my gaze to the emergency medicine book sitting in my lap.

"Laur..." I hear a voice groan out, causing me to look up at Tamsin for the third time in as many minutes. Just as I am about to open my mouth it registers in my mind for the first time how exhausted Tamsin looks, hair mussed and sticking up in all directions as it is struggling to escape from it's bun, and heavy bags have appeared under her eyes. What on earth had happened overnight?

Quickly I stand up and walk over to her, grabbing one of the bags that she had dropped at her feet, scared that she would trip over it if I didn't. "We should get you to bed. You look awful. Bad night?"

"You don't look like such a ray of sunshine yourself princess." I hear her grumble as I begin to walk towards her room. "Shouldn't you be sleeping? You've got a shift tonight don't you?"

"Tamsin it's nine am. I can grab a nap around noon and head in at four for the change of shift."

"It's that early still?" I hear her moan as she stumbles behind me. I glance backwards at her again before I shake my head, smirking in amusement as she clumsily walks further into the apartment, although that amusement quickly turns into worry when I see her trip over her own feet, nearly sending her head first to the ground.

"Easy!" I yell as I dash towards her, dropping the bag in the process, grabbing the closet arm I could get from her side and bringing it up over my shoulder, wrapping my other arm around her waist. "Let's get you to bed before you fall and hurt yourself okay?"

"Ciara here?"

"I'm sorry Tamsin, she isn't."

Had she worked through the night without coming home until now?

She must have if she's this dead on her feet, and I don't remember hearing her come in earlier this morning, the time she is normally home at, if she has to pick up a night shift for some reason or another.

Tamsin groans as her body sags further into mine, I stumble as I try to readjust my grip on her so that sudden dead weight of Tamsin didn't send us both tumbling to the ground.

Tamsin is small but by no means is she light.

"Let's get you to bed okay?"

"Warm." I tilt my head to the side for a minute, trying to figure out what she is talking about before I realize that she's must be talking about her bed.

"You know this reminds me of all the times I had to haul your drunk ass home."

"'M not drunk. I' tired"

"I know. You don't smell like a distillery like you usually do when you drink. Long night?"

"You don't wanna know."

"I'm sure I do, but not right now sleepy let's get you to bed alright?" I mumble as I reach out to open the door to her bedroom.

* * *

"Oi Scrubs!" I hear a voice call out. Quickly shooting up off the couch I grab around trying to find my phone and see what time it is. When I finally grab it I quickly push the button to light up the screen, when I glance down I can see that it's only a little past two, not time for me to head to work yet.

"What do you want Tamsin?" I grumble as I pull myself up into a sitting position on the couch. I need more sleep then this if I am going to last through the night, unfortunately ER physician does not equal a night's sleep.

And it's a Friday, which means that it's going to be a night full of car crashes and other traumas that would fill my night with stitching or worse.

I can hear Tamsin tapping her foot impatiently as she waits for something. "You want to know how my meeting with Bo went don't you?"

"Well she sure as hell isn't here is she? Or else I doubt you would be napping out here in the living room." She pauses as I finish shifting myself upward and turn my head towards her so I can look her in the eye. "And you fell asleep on your textbook again, it left a pattern on your cheek."

Bringing my hands up I rub them against the sides of my face. I can feel the indentations in the skin from where I must have fallen asleep on the raised cover of the book. Glancing up at Tamsin I see her shoulders shaking with repressed laughter as she looks at me, amusement twinkling in her eyes.

"Lungs or heart?" I grumble as I rub at my cheek, hoping the pattern will disappear soon.

"Heart this time. Not so bad actually, suits you far more then the lungs do."

I roll my eyes at her before I shift over on the couch and move my textbook onto the coffee table in front of us. Silently asking if she wants to sit down with me.

"I'm going to get some coffee from the kitchen. You want any?" I shake my head as I watch Tamsin walk into the other room a few steps away from my current place on the couch.

"So how did your date go?"

"It wasn't a date!"

"And the sky is orange."

"Well there are many things it was, and I can assure you that one of them was not a date." I grumble, but the blush that stains my cheeks as I remember last night give me away all to quickly as Tamsin begins to laugh at me.

"Uhuh sure it wasn't."

Grumbling I glance over at Tamsin again before adding. "Katherine showed up. I ran away."

"You ran again!" I sigh and close my eyes as I nod. "Fuck I knew something was going to happen. Did she try to talk to you?"

"Yes."

"And you just ran away from her?"

"Yes."

"Wow. What time is this?"

"Fourth."

"That many huh?"

"Yeah."

"You didn't try and talk to her."

"I kind of learned my lesson from what was it… attempt three?"

"Two."

"Right 'cause you were there for that one."

"Was I?"

"It was the one at the park near your division."

"Oh that one."

"Yeah."

"I really wish I could punch her sometimes you know?"

"I wish I could talk to her. That would at least stop me from embarrassing myself every time she shows up in my life."

"You said you didn't feel embarrassed when this happens?"

"Oh I do I just didn't hit me until afterwards, like usual, Bo asked me why exactly I was running away from _her_."

"Oh."

"Yah."

"Where exactly did you hide?"

"Fountain area you showed me back in second year of medical school."

"The deserted one?"

"Yeah. I spent half an hour reading my gross anatomy text book from first year to calm down."

"Panic attack again?"

"Mad at myself for being a coward and running away from her again."

"Huh. So it went better then the second and third time but worse then the first?"

"Katherine avoided me that first time while I pretended I was with Ciara!"

"This one still went better then the third time."

I groan as I bury my head in my hands as the memory of that incredibly embarrassing day surfaces. I think I spent nearly four hours hiding from Katherine that time, Tamsin sitting on the ground with me as I worked through a panic attack for most of it, although that was more then likely a stress reaction. It had been an overall horrible day. I had lost almost all of my patients that day, my first day on an ICU rotation, and I'd done something to anger someone so I'd been handed me the worst assignments, and on top of it all I had seen Katherine that day.

I spotted her in the middle of a very crowded intersection, and I had turned around and began to walk in the opposite direction before she noticed. It had taken nearly half an hour for Tamsin to track me down after I didn't meet her at work to go home. "That was just an embarrassing day."

"Yeah it was. I still can't believe you accidentally stole an old lady's ice cream cone in the process."

I let out another groan. I have tried to block out that particular part of the sequence of events. "I was trying to forget that. Thank-you for bringing it up again."

"Ah well there's always next time for good impressions."

"You think so?"

"I vomited on Ciara the first time we met remember?"

"Oh yeah." I mumble as I snicker.

"Just maybe try and stop running whenever you see her?"

"Problem is I still don't know how to face her."

"Huh."

"Yeah."

"Yesterday was supposed to be the best day of your life?"

"I think that was when I met her, and I ended up passing out."

"In a pool of your own blood." Tamsin pipes in unhelpfully

"Yes in a pool of my own blood, thank-you for reminding me of that. Apparently there's a rumour floating around about that nobody will tell be about. " I can feel her grab my arm in a tight grip as she turns my hand over, surprisingly gently, as she holds it firmly in her palm.

"Speaking of the puddles of blood your bandage needs changing again."

"I changed it fourteen hours ago!" I mutter in annoyance.

I sigh as I stand up, but as I am about to walk away I felt Tamsin grab the sleeve of my shirt in between two of her fingers. "Lauren? You really do need to stop running away from Katherine when you see her. You need some closure; honestly I think you both do. Because that relationship has started to haunt you again."

I sigh and shrug as I look down at Tamsin briefly before my eyes drift away and out towards the window. "I know that Tamsin, and it's embarrassing to run every time I see her. But when I'm there all I can think is run."

"So you know you shouldn't run, but you do it anyway?"

"Pretty much."

"You know it's funny here because normally it's the other way around. It's the other person who flees because they can't stand to face their ex. But here you're the one running, despite the fact that you honestly didn't do anything wrong at the end of your relationship."

"Yeah I know that I probably shouldn't have been dating her in the first place. That one was my fault, as was why we got to the point where she figured a note would be better then face-to-face."

I could see Tamsin shrug. "It hasn't stopped people in the past, my parents for example, they were happily married for years before my father found his soulmate and abandoned my mother and I. They both knew the risks, but decided to do it anyway. Although to be fair my father had the decency to end their marriage face-to-face and filled for divorce."

"And my ex up and left me without an explanation, except for a note. The only reason we even know about Natalie is because of you and Hale."

"You're about to enter a new relationship, and yet you're still hung up on your ex."

I sigh as I pinch the bridge of my nose. "It's not why she broke up with me that I don't understand, I know her reason and to be honest it's a valid one. What I _don't_ understand is why she ended it the way that she did. I mean up until that point I had only ever seen that on soap-operas."

"Katherine's a runner and you knew that because _she_ told you that."

I snort. "And I'm a runner as well Tamsin I know…"

"Sometimes I wonder if you ever realized just how similar you two are to each other." I hear Tamsin mumble under her breath.

I sigh as I rub the bridge of my nose, resisting the urge to begin to ramble. Glancing over at the clock on the wall I smile at her before I begin to talk again. "Anything interesting happen at work today?"

I could see her pause for a moment as her hand came to rest against her chin, as if she has to think about it in order to try and recall some interesting events that had happened to her overnight. "I got a new partner."

"Huh. Anything interesting about 'em?"

"Yeah. Ciara's ex." My jaw drops slightly as I glance over at Tamsin. Had they actually assigned Dyson to her? I know that they work in the same division, but I… "I didn't know he was a detective."

"Neither did I Scrubs, neither did I." Her face screws up, almost as if she's disgusted by the idea of having to work with him, which knowing her might actually be the case. She has chased off what… three partners now?

"Oh do you wanna hear about the stories I heard from some of the traffic officers today?" Shaking my head I laugh as I nod my head, wondering on earth they have gotten into this week.

But just as Tamsin is about to tell the story I finally caught sight of the pajama pants she's wearing.

"You really need to pay attention to whose drawers your taking your clothes from Tamsin"

Tamsin's gaze quickly move down to look at the pants that are encasing her leg, her eyes widening as I burst out laughing.

"The freakin' penguins!" She groans as I flop back onto the couch starting to laugh so hard my legs begin to give away.

"I never knew Ciara owned those." I say in between fits of laughter as my eyes drift back and forth between Tamsin and her penguins in love pyjama bottoms.

Complete with hearts.

I burst out laughing again

"Ciara and I apparently need to have a talk about clothes sharing… _again_."

"What is this?" I laugh out. "The third time?"

"The fifth." Tamsin grumbles out, her arms crossing over her chest.

"Very intimidating!" I laugh out when I realize that she is wearing the matching top.

Oh how did I missed this exactly?

"The top too! Oh we are so reorganizing the dresser when she gets home tonight."

* * *

"Dr. Lewis!" I hear the voice of my attending call out from behind me. Quickly I lift my head up from the chart that I had been reading and turn around. I try to smile amiably at him, raising my hand in greeting, the other gripping the hard plastic of Bay 10's binder.

"Dr. Nelson." It's rare that he bothers me when I am not checking in on a patient or trying to manage one of the medical students. "Can I help you?"

"There's a woman in Bay three who's asking for you."

"Oh no. Mrs. Archer isn't in here again is she?" I ask him.

He shakes his head before Dr. Nelson simply tells me. "I believe she was the young woman I treated after you passed out the night your mark filled in."

"Oh…"

"Yes Dr. Lewis, but don't worry I already sent her home, no need for the nurses to get a hold of her. But that's not the reason I'm talking to you, Larry wanted to speak to you about a patient and asked me to pass along the message and such. Could you meet him in the resident's locker room?"

"That a v-… and you're gone." I say as I watch him walk away.

Dr. Nelson is a very strange man.

He is a very kind man in his own way, but still an incredibly strange man.

Well he is kind to me at least.

Larry not so much.

That probably has to do with the fact that the first time they met Larry passed out and in the process fell on top of him bringing them both to the ground. Not exactly an ideal first impression, and with Dr. Nelson those are very important to say the least.

Now I can't help but wonder what kind of trouble Larry has gotten himself involved in this time. Hopefully it isn't another case of homeless worm man coming by for another visit.

He's due back soon for a check-up on his legs if I'm not mistaken.

Oh what's his name again…

Sighing I turn around on my heel and head off to the resident's locker room, stopping by the nurses station quickly to drop off the chart that I am carrying. "Can you call the tech? Bay 10 needs an ultrasound on her ovaries to rule out cysts and Bay 6 well... can you try orthopedics again?"

"Right away Dr. Lewis." I nod and smile at Jackie in thanks.

As I walk past I can't help but glance at the waiting room. It looks incredibly full, so why is Dr. Nelson sending me to meet with Larry in the locker room?

I sigh before I walk back over the nurses station. "Who's next to be seen?"

"Dr. Nelson told me to tell you that Dr. Spitz was waiting for you in the locker room." I smile tightly and nod again.

"But there seems to be a very full crowd in the waiting room."

"Don't worry we can handle it."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes Dr. Lewis, now would you please go see Dr. Spitz?"

What is going on this time?

An ER wide conspiracy to keep me away from the treatment areas for some reason?

Or Larry is indeed in need of help again.

Probably the latter, this happens with Larry sometimes. Maybe Amelia's gotten sick again? She's at that age…

If that is the case then I would have to cover the rest of his shift by myself.

Great, more stitching because I'm sure he did something to anger someone again. He always seems to do that. For the most part a competent doctor, but he has a thing for angering the nurses, and our attendings, and the upper year residents.

"Page me if you need extra help, _any_ extra help." I really don't want to do stitches.

Hmm… maybe it's time to pawn that off on the first years? Their sutures have been getting sloppy lately.

Jackie smiles politely at me before she waves me off, her hands reaching out to pick up the ringing telephone.

"Hello?" She glances at me again before making a shooing motion with her hands, telling me to go somewhere else.

Sighing I raise my hand up and mouth goodbye before I continue on my way down to the resident's locker room. Stopping briefly because I begin to yawn I realize that perhaps it's also time to make a quick trip to the cafeteria to get some coffee.

Especially if my caseload is about to double again.

Glancing down at my watch I sigh when I realize that I am only three hours into my twelve-hour shift.

This is going to be a long one isn't it?

Walking over to the door of the locker room I pull it open calling out "Larry are you in here?"

"Back here Lauren!" Is the frantic response I get followed by the sounds of tiny high-pitched coughs, followed after that by the sounds of gagging.

Who...

Oh Amelia…

Quickly walking to the bathroom area I see the door to the washroom propped open by a foot covered in a familiar white and black running shoe. As I round the corner and approach the washroom more and more of my colleague comes into view. His blue scrub pants first, followed by more and more of his scrub covered body until I'm standing in the doorway of the washroom, watching him hold a little girl dressed in spider-man pyjamas up that she could reach the toilet.

"All done kiddo?" I see the back of Amelia's dark head bob up and down as Larry releases the hair he had been holding off of her face. His bespectacled blue eyes turn towards me, a relieve smile tugging at his lips.

"Guess who's here Amy?" He asks with false cheer as he sets her back down on the bathroom floor. She wobbles as she turns around to face me before giving me a small exhausted smile.

"Auntie Ren." She murmurs as her eyes fall closed, her little body slumping against Larry's.

Walking over the paper towel dispenser I grab a piece and reach over to turn on the tap, running it under the cool water quickly, I reach up and flick the tap shut before I walk over to where Larry is sitting on the ground, his daughter now nestled firmly in his lap.

"Here" I murmur as I kneel next to them.

"Thank-you" He replies before pressing the cloth to Amelia's mouth, cleaning the remnants of her sick off for her. She must truly be ill if this normally independent girl is allowing her father to clean off her face like he is.

"How long has she been like this?"

"My mum and dad say she's been like this for two days or so."

I raise my eyebrow about to ask him why he didn't know before I realize that he must not have been able to take Amelia home for the past two days. "Sorry."

"Hey it's not a big deal. Well it kind of is… it was your day off and you weren't on call. It's Dr. Nelson's fault that I got dragged onto the extra shift and then only had time to go home and sleep on my couch for a couple of hours before coming back here." I nod absently as I scan Amelia's face, her flushed cheeks a deep contrast against her pale dry skin.

She looks dehydrated and flush with fever.

"How long has she been like this?" I ask as I put my stethoscope to my ear and press the other end against the Amelia's chest. I can hear her heart racing in my ears, the beat swifter then it should have been, even for a child her age.

I can feel Amelia squirming against my hand. "I'm sorry sweetie I know it's cold."

"I already told you that Lauren." He hisses at me when I pull my stethoscope out of my ears and wrap it back around my neck.

"I meant how long has she been dehydrated for? She's tachycardic from the sound of it."

"Her grandpa says she hasn't really been able to keep much down, including fluids."

And there we go. "They brought her in because she needs a drip."

"'m thirsty." A tiny voice mumbles from against Larry's chest, her small hand twisted in his blue scrub shirt as she tries to stand up again, her face only just coming level with Larry's. Without even thinking he runs his hand through her hair in an attempt to comfort her.

"Do you think it'll stay down if you have something to drink."

Amelia shakes her head in response. "No… my tummy still feels funny."

"Do you know where grandma and grandpa are?"

"Place we eat with daddy."

The cafeteria.

"I should probably go get them."

"What are you and Amelia even doing in here in the first place?" I finally ask.

"She said she felt funny. Like she had before she was going to throw-up. I panicked and ran her in here. This is the result." He motions as he picks Amelia up by her armpits, shifting her so that she is standing more fully upright.

"You know they have bowls for that in the ER right?" I ask. Of course he knew they did but still…

"I panicked. This was the first place that I thought of." He mumbles as he wraps his hands more firmly around her torso, helping the swaying Amelia stay standing.

"Why don't you go and find your parents?" I ask Larry. "I can take her and get a drip started for her while you find them."

He hesitates before I look him in the eye. "We have open Bay's and you know how fond the nurses are of her. She won't be alone… and you need to change your shirt." I mention when I notice his scrubs are covered in his daughter's vomitus.

I raise my eyebrow at him before he shrugs. "We didn't make it into the toilet on the first try. But…"

I can see him hesitate. "Larry why don't you take a minute and just clean yourself up at the very least." I whisper in his ear.

"You won't leave her?" I shake my head.

"Not for a second."

"Is it alright if you go with Auntie Ren for a minute kiddo? I need to go and find out where grandma and grandpa went."

"'Kay." A half yawned response is the only thing that we get as Amelia starts to slump over again. Quickly I shift my hands in beside Larry's under Amelia's armpits, ready to hold her up when Larry let's go.

As soon as he does I scoop Amelia up and settle her on my hip. I can feel her small hand twisting into my scrub top, a small fist forming as she clenches at the fabric trying to find purchase on the smooth material. Her other hand tries to wrap around my neck, but she is obviously to tired and her arm to short to get a good grip, so it simply hangs over where I am holding her to me.

"You can't sleep just yet honey. I'm sorry." I mumble into her hair as I feel her head settle against my shoulder. I press a kiss to her forehead as I jostle her lightly to keep her awake.

"Be good for Auntie Ren okay kiddo?" Larry adds as he stands up, his hand reaching over to run his fingers through his daughter's hair again before leaning down to kiss the crown of her head.

"Sleepy daddy." I smile as I glance up at Larry, shifting slightly as I try to position Amelia comfortably in my arms.

She's lighter than I thought she would be, or perhaps that is simply my faulty memory, given that the last time I'd had to pick her up like this was more than a year ago.

"Come on honey let's go get you settled and then we'll get you some medicine to help with you feel better okay?"

The only response I get is a weak nod before her head lulls against my shoulder again. Smiling slightly I shift her weight again before stepping out of the bathroom and beginning to walk towards the treatment area.

I sigh, stopping briefly on the way in order to shift Amelia around in my arms again when her head lulls off my shoulder. I can feel her grip on my shirt tighten when I stop to shift her again a minute later as my arms grow tired. "I'm not going to let you go honey, it's alright you'll be better soon."

"Sleepy."

"I know honey you need to stay awake for me a little while longer okay?" I murmur into her hair.

I don't get much of a response out of her beyond her fist gripping at my shirt even tighter then she had been before. I could feel my heart breaking for the little girl in my arms, but right now she needed me as her doctor and not as Auntie Ren.

Slowly I begin to walk again towards one of the open treatment Bays. Passing by the nurses station I can see Jackie look up from her place at the phone, her eyes widening almost imperceptibly when she catches sight of Amelia in my arms. She turns around in her seat and begins to call for Francis. Looking over at her I smile gratefully when she mouths to me. "Bay seven if open."

I nod knowing that a dehydrated child, especially one as young as Amelia, is a high priority and she would have been admitted fairly soon anyways. The crowd in the ER seems to have thinned out slightly I notice when I glance towards the waiting room.

As I walk towards the open curtain of Bay seven I hear someone call out my name. "Lauren?"

Turning around I catch sight of an all to familiar brunette.

I freeze for a minute as I fight back the urge to run. The small moaning person in my arms stopping me from doing so because she reminds me she needs to be treated now.

Remember what Tamsin said.

If you want a happy life here you need to take the first step and face her.

I gulp as I open my mouth to speak, the words acrid even as I say them. "Hello Katherine."


	6. Chapter 6

"Lauren. Hello." Katherine responds to me, her voice cool in its politeness. Perhaps in response to my acrid tone earlier, but she doesn't continue to speak after she greets me, her eyes instead shifting to the young girl in my arms. Amelia begins to cough lightly soon after, I quickly move away from my ex in case she becomes sick to her stomach.

"You okay sweetie?" I ask as I bounce her lightly on my hip, adjusting her weight once again as the muscles in my arms slowly tire and begin to ache from holding a thirty pound weight in my arms for this long. The last thing I want to do is drop her after all of this time. Amelia yawns once before she buries her face in my shoulder, it's the same thing she's done since she was a baby.

"You sleepy honey?" I ask bouncing lightly in place, a tender smile crossing my lips as I look down at the short brown hair of the little girl in my arms, her face hidden by my neck.

"We're almost done here, I promise, and then we'll get you onto a gurney okay?" I hum in her ear as I glance back over at Katherine. The sound of rhythmic tapping is filling the narrow corridor we currently occupy. She stares at me with her arms crossed over her chest as her foot continues to strike the ground with her foot.

I turn towards Katherine about to tell her to leave me alone when Amelia weakly lifts her head up, turning it so she could see Katherine.

"Auntie Rin?" She asks as she begins to cough again, her body shuddering with the force of the air being expelled from the her lungs. Is she going to be sick? Katherine's eyes are wide as they begin to dart around, her lips drawn tightly over her teeth.

"Amy?" I ask, my voice calm and even as I slip into my roll as a medical professional. "Do you feel like you're going to be sick?"

Between coughs she manages to shake her head, her face turning red from exertion as tears form in the corner of her eyes her body continuing to shudder as the deep hacking coughs escaping from her lungs. Looking up over Amelia's head I catch Jackie's eyes, tilting my head towards the bowls stacked on her desk, she puts her fingers up and gestures to the phone in her ear before quickly saying something into the receiver and putting it down on the desk. I smile at her, grateful for the help, as the coughing slowly begins to slow. The hacking cough is being replaced by weaker and more raspy barks.

"Okay sweetie?" I ask her as she finally settles down, falling silent as she brings a fist up to wipe away the tears that have escaped from her eyes. She shakes her head no before she settles her face back into the crook of my neck, the little puffs of air leaving her mouth tickling my skin in a rhythmic dance of involuntary action and sensation. I turn to Jackie again as she walks towards me the blue bowl for Amelia in hand. I silently shake my head and tilt it in the direction of the treatment Bays as I whisper comforting words in Amelia's ear. She nods to me once before darting off in the direction of Bay seven.

"Thank-you" I whisper as she walks past us on her way back to the desk. She flashes me a smile of understanding, a hand briefly brushing across Amelia's back.

Turning towards Katherine, who has remained silent through the entire I event, I notice an expression that quickly crosses her face, one I can't quite place, as a quiet longing appears in her eyes, and frown tugs at her lips. The look has replaced the twinkle that used to light up her eyes and that beautiful, warm, but rare smile to appear on her lips whenever I held Amelia as I do now. I shift her again slightly as her weight comes to rest against me more heavily, her body beginning to relax fully as she drifts off to sleep, or begins a slow descent into a coma.

"You need to stay awake for me honey." I say into her ear, my breath rustling her short hair, pushing it away. I shift her again lightly, trying my best not to make her feel sicker than she already is.

"Good girl." I whisper when I feel her tense against me.

"Lauren do you want me to...?" Katherine asks, rocking back and forth on her heels as she lifts her hands away from her side. Amelia's body stiffens against mine, the heavy and relaxed weight suddenly rigid in my arms.

"No! Stay Auntie Ren." Amelia nearly screams in distress.

Looking at Amelia; Katherine's eyes widen as her mouth hangs opening slightly for a moment, before her morphs into a picture of sadness: her eyebrows drawing together as a small frown tugging at her lips, her eyes downcast. Katherine must be surprised, Amelia has always preferred being held by her as opposed to me. Katherine closes her eyes and shakes her head before a small smile tugs at her lips, one that doesn't reach her softening eyes. Moving one of my hands away from Amelia's bottom I begin to rub up and down her back, trying to relax her tense muscles.

"It's okay honey, I promised I wouldn't leave you until daddy comes back didn't I?" I murmur as I lean down to press a kiss to her worryingly dry forehead. Slowly she begins to relax again as I move my hand away from her back and interlock it with my other in order to support the weight of her weakened body.

"We need to talk Lauren." Katherine finally says as she averts her eyes away from Amelia, her arms falling back down to her side. Her mouth relaxes and she turns her eyes towards me once again, all traces of emotion having been banished from them as she hardens her expression. I sigh as I lean my cheek against Amelia's hair, my eyebrows drawing together as I frown tightly.

Was she actually serious?

Here and now of all times? While Amelia is obviously sick and in need of care? And Larry isn't around?

"I'm at work Katherine." I say in disbelief over this woman's priorities. "And Amelia is ill, very ill. So I'm sorry, but we can't talk right now because I have a job to do and a preschooler to take care of until her father can find can get cleaned up."

Katherine rolls her eyes at me before she sighs and brings her hand up to pinch the bridge of her nose, her eyebrows knitting together. "I'm here because Natalie is injured." She says, her voice low with resignation. "She's concussed and asleep right now. I'm not here because you're, this is just an unfortunate coincidence."

"Sorry… I didn't know." I say apologetically as I look at her and her gaze shifts down to the floor, her eyes refusing to meet mine.

"But if she's here, then why are you trying to talk to me instead, of staying with her?" I ask as I take a step towards her, any lingering fear I have over her fading away when she glances up at me, her eyes wide with fear, and a few small hints of watery tears forming in the corners. It's hard to even remember why I've run from her for so long when I see her like this.

"The nurses shooed me out because they needed to do something to her, and didn't want me to stay." She says, her eyes darting towards one of the private treatment rooms we use to monitor some patients in the short-term, either until they're moved upstairs or can be discharged. Her brown wrinkles and her eyes return to the white and blue pattern tiles as her foot begins to tap again.

I wonder if she would be pacing if I wasn't here. Looking at her now I feel a small amount of sympathy for the woman in front of me. Right now she is any other distressed family member or loved one, she isn't the person who hurt me. She is simply a patient's girlfriend.

"Do you want me to go and check on her after Larry comes back? Or to get one of the nurses to?" I ask sympathetically, they must not have realized that this is Natalie's soulmate, it happens sometimes when we wrongly kick their soulmate out, only to realize afterwards that they were the soulmate rather then the girlfriend/boyfriend. I'd have access to Natalie when she wouldn't, and if I can reassure her that her soulmate is fine then maybe she'll feel a little better than she does right now.

"We _need_ to talk Lauren." Katherine says, ignoring my previous offer.

I sigh and shake my head before responding. "I can't Katherine. I'm on shift right now and Larry will be out for the rest of the night looking after Amelia, so I have to cover his patients. You know how this goes..."

"Lauren?" A deep voice calls out, cutting me off. I turn around to see Larry walking as fast as he can towards me, two older people following closely behind him, bags heavy-set under their eyes as they lean against each other to keep balance and keep up with their son. I shift Amelia so that I can run my hand through her hair, leaning down to press a kiss to the crown of her head as I move slightly in an attempt to get her attention.

"Amy!" I whisper excitedly in her ear, trying not to startle the half asleep girl. "Come on honey Daddy's back."

"Daddy?" Her small, weak voice whispers as the hand that has been gripping at my shirt finally loosens, the small pinch releasing as her fist moves up to rub her eyes while she shifts herself upward in my arms, supporting some of her own weight instead of leaning against me completely. Smiling gently, I squeeze her to me as Larry comes to a halt in front of us, the beginnings of a wide grin tugging at his lips as he reaches over to run a hand through Amelia's short hair.

"Hey kiddo." Larry whispers affectionately as Amelia moves both of her arms out towards him, a happy, but weak, smile on her lips when she catches sight of her father. He sticks his tongue out at her before he wraps his hands around her small, thin, torso and lifts her out of his arms, grunting as he does so, his face twisting in a mock grimace. Amelia giggles as she is settled onto his hip, a little more lively then she had been a few minutes ago. I smile at her as I reach out to stroke her hair, trying to keep her awake, as she settles into Larry's arms.

"No sleep for you yet kiddo. I'm sorry." He says when Amelia yawns again, her fist rubbing at her eyes as she tilts her head back, causing my hand to slide down her back. "Soon though."

"After lied on garnuy?" Amelia asks him as she leans more of her weight against him, her small body slumping into his as one of her hands grabbing at his blue T-shirt, while the other dangles at her side, to short to wrap around his neck just yet. She really is still small for her age I note as the Spider-man pyjamas slip down her arm, revealing a jutting collarbone.

"Huh? What do you… Oh gurney!" Larry laughs as he reaches up to readjust Amelia's too big shirt.

"Francis has Bay seven prepped if you want to take her back, he's the one who's going to be doing the thing…" I say as I lift my left arm up and press one of my fingers against the skin there at an angle, mimicking the IV insertion process.

"At least it's Francis, he's good with kids and with the you-know-whats. After you get some medicine you can go to sleep Amy, for as long as you want okay?" He tells her, his voice rising in pitch as he talks to her. I can't help but laugh silently, he used to do this when she was a baby all the time, and I guess he must still do it without realizing it from time-to-time.

"Thank-you Lauren." He says, his hand running up and down Amelia's back as she begins to cough softly again.

"You know I love Amelia and I don't mind looking after her." I say to him. "If you need me I'm there, you know that."

"I can't think of a better babysitter then the infamous Dr. Lewis of our graduating class." He teases gently before turning so that Amelia could see me. "Do you want to say goodnight to Auntie Ren?"

Amelia smiles weakly at me before her eyes drift closed as she relaxes in Larry's arms, her shoulders dropping visibly, her grip on Larry's scrub top slackening, as she begins to drift off to sleep again.

"Night honey, feel better soon okay?" I say bending forward slightly as I reach over to brush a few loose strands of hair off her forehead, causing bleary eyes to blink open at me once me before they drift closed again, a sleepy smile tugging at Amelia's lips. I straighten up and turn towards Larry before adding. "You take care of her, I'll cover for the rest of the night."

Larry eyes widen slightly as he blinks a few times, his eyebrows arching upward. "You don't have to do that."

"No." I say before smiling reassuringly. "But I want to."

"Thank-you Lauren, so much." He murmurs in relief, his eyes closing as he smiles slightly. I reach out and pat him lightly on his unoccupied shoulder.

"Go. Take care of her okay?" I say as he begins to walk away, his parents going in the opposite direction, probably heading to the waiting room so that they can grab some rest of their own. I can only imagine how long they must've been up with her.

"Yeah yeah just don't faint." I call out after him.

"Just don't go sewing eyeballs into corpses head!" Larry shouts in response, spinning around to flash me a teasing grin.

"Trust me I won't!" I say, shuddering at the memories from _that_ day.

"It's going to be a long night." I mumble to myself before shaking my head and smiling. "At least it'll be worth it if Amy gets better."

I stretch my arms out, sighing in relief when some of the pain from holding Amelia goes away.

"You and I can talk now that you've handed over Amelia can't we?" A voice calls out from behind me. Turning around to face the direction that the sound had come from I end up standing face-to-face with an impatient looking Katherine. "Well?"

"Katherine?" I ask surprised that she is still here. I though she had walked away after Larry came by, whatever the nurses were doing with Natalie should be done by now. "Is everything alright?"

"We need to talk." She repeats.

"I have-" I start before she cuts me off.

"If I remember correctly you have a break-" She begins before I interrupt her.

"I can't tonight Katherine, I have to get back to work. Go and see Natalie, both of you should rest and try to get some sleep, she should be moved upstairs soon. Why don't you go and wait with her until then?" I ask, smiling politely. "Do you want me to see if there's anything I can do to speed up the transfer?"

"So you're not willing to talk at all?" She says before sighing, hard eyes staring into mine as she adds. "You can't run from me forever."

"Right now you should be with Natalie, she probably needs you." I say, trying to be diplomatic. "Look, I really do have to go alright? Tonight's looking to be bad and they need all the help they can get." I say gesturing in the direction of the overcrowded waiting room.

"Lauren..." Katherine begins, her jaw tense, and eyes hard. She's ready for a fight, and sadly there's no reasoning with her when she's like this.

"If you want to meet so badly I'm done at five alright?" I say, looking up at her one last time, a sympathetic smile tugging at my lips as a nurse approaches from behind.

"How about our old spot okay? Now go, I think you can see Natalie now." I say absently gesturing to the nurse approaching us from behind. I wave at the big man, who I can recognize as Mark as he gets closer, before I begin to walk away heading back towards the nurses station. I can see the pile of charts on the to be seen rack, stacked precariously high on the tray as well as the long line0up of patients digitally, and even from where I stand I can tell that my hunch about it being a long night is an accurate one.

"Hey Jackie?" I ask as I reach out and take the chart for the next patient to be seen, flipping it open I lean against the station before asking. "Can you do something to see if you can speed up Natalie's, you know who I'm talking about, transfer upstairs?"

Jackie looks up at me before a sympathetic smile tugging at her lips. "Dr. Nelson already told me to put a rush on it. She'll be upstairs in a little while don't worry Dr. Lewis we've got your back."

I smile gratefully as I begin to read over the admitting nurses notes, as well as those of the medical student, whose handwriting is surprisingly legible. "Alright then, page me if something goes wrong with Larry's cases for the rest of the night please."

"Dr. Spitz is with Amy?"

"Yeah." I respond as I continue to read through the notes.

"Then of course Dr. Lewis." Jackie responds her eyes softening as she reaches out to answer the ringing phone. "Let me know if you need help."

I give her a half smile and nod my head in thanks before I set off towards Bay three.

* * *

"We're just waiting for orthopedics to come and consult, but they're swamped from earlier tonight so it might be a while." I warn the first year resident as I hand over Mr. Ahmed's chart. "Monitor the swelling and talk to someone higher then you if something changes drastically alright?"

There were only a few patients in the ER right now, a lucky coincidence as change of shift came about. I'm never sure whether to be grateful for night-shift ending or exhausted.

Right now I'm wound-up, and tense as the inevitable meeting with Katherine that is ticking closer with each minute I stand here doing hand-off. My heart begins to pound in my chest when I glance up at the clock and see the minute hand ticking precariously closer to the twelve with each circle of the seconds hand, an infinite loop counting down the moments to answers that I both want and dread.

I shake my head and move my gaze away from the clock, instead focusing on the first-year resident in front of me. "Do you have all the information you need?"

"Yes, Dr. Lewis. Thank-you." He says, his voice barely audible over the staccato rhythm of my heart in my ears, an ever constant count of the seconds and minutes until time zero. I smile at him, a tight one and a polite one as I hand over the last chart, the sudden absence of the heavy weight both a relief and a terrifying reality.

"Have a good day." I say to him, as he returns the smile, the corners of his lips upturned and his eyes sparkling with genuine joy. It is nice to see new faces in the form of the first-years, they sometimes have the ability remind us why we became doctors in the first place with their enthusiasm and willingness to help. Something I sometimes forget in the shuffle of seeing patients and the never ending exhaustion that comes with being a resident.

"You as well Dr. Lewis, from the looks of the charts you've handed to me it's going to be a well deserved break." I nod, an appreciative smile tugging at my lips as a yawn escaping from my mouth before I can stop it. Slowly I glance over at Mr. Ahmed one last time before I slowly turn around and begin to walk towards the locker room.

The momentary distraction of the conversation is gone, allowing the monster that has been breathing over my shoulder all night to finally take a hold of me as my heart begins to pound hard against my chest, as if it's trying to escape from its dark home beneath the protection of my ribs. My palms become slick with sweat as I try to push the door in, my hands slipping down the cool metal of the door.

My eyes dart around the room as I enter, quickly taking in the surroundings. It's almost funny how paranoid I am that she is going to ambush me here of all places, she knows she isn't allowed back here, although that didn't stop her in the past. I sigh as I take in the rows of white stacked lockers and the light brown benches that run in between the aisles, even they look tempting right now, despite the fact I know they are hard and far to uncomfortable to fall asleep on unless it's been a thirty-hour shift with no breaks.

Walking two rows down and four lockers up I come to a halt in front of a white-coloured locker, the same as any of the others in any of the other rows. The only trace of individuality being the combination lock I use to keep my locker closed. I smile slightly as I reach out to grab the flame-patterned lock in front of me, my sweaty palms making it difficult to find purchase on the smooth metal, to the point that I have to give up try to hold it. This had been a gift from Tamsin, one of her old ones from uni. She gave it to me because I'd been running around the apartment trying to find my lock the night before my first shift.

I chuckle at the happy memory as I bring my hands up and once again grab the lock, this time I find purchase. I twist the lock, my anxiety about my meeting with my ex banished for a few moments by the happy memory from before things became so complicated. A few quick flicks of my wrist and I'm tugging down as the mechanism releases the long side of the metal pin with an audible click. Moving the lock quickly away from the door I swing the locker open, the hinges screeching their protesting sound of metal-against-metal as I do so. Reaching in, my hand groping around in the dark area, the overhead lights barely providing enough to overcome the darkness in the room, before I come across the rough fabric of my backpack.

I pull it upwards and out by one of the shoulder straps, the weight a familiar comfort that hasn't truly changed since my first-year here. It and Tamsin as well as the apartment we share are probably the only constants that I have in my life right now because everything else around me is in flux, and will be until I can get this _thing_ with Katherine resolved and begin to move on and try to find out how Bo and I can make things work as our relationship grows and evolves.

I glance down at my watch, the digital clock showing me 4:55:34 AM on its electronic face. I quickly reach out and close the door before sliding the lock back into place, pressing upward until I hear the tell-tale click of the mechanism sliding into place. Closing my eyes I slip the backpack onto my shoulders, the added weight a comforting approximation to my normal routine.

I glance around the locker room one last time, as the debate that has been simmering within me quietly all night begins to boil to the surface. To run or to stay and finally face her?

The though of facing her once again causes my heart to begin to pound against my chest, the beat fast and hard against my breast, as my cortisol levels increase. I force myself to take a breathe, sitting down on the uncomfortably hard bench behind me. My palms turn sweaty as I grab at the solid wood on either side of my knees. It would be so easy to run, to escape from this once again, but I can't bring myself to stand-up and walk out the door either as Tamsin's words echo in my mind.

I can't run anymore.

I just can't. Not if I ever want a future of my own choosing.

I force myself to take a cleansing breathe as my eyes slowly open to stare at the locker in front of me, the stark whiteness a reflection of what my mind has to be.

Taking another breathe and closing my eyes I stand-up, my mind made-up.

I have a future with Bo now. I've met my soulmate, dwelling on Katherine is only holding me back from any happiness that I can and will find with Bo. She has met Natalie and has moved on, now it is my turn to finally do the same. Glancing around the beige-the same shade as the rest of the ER- room, I close my eyes and take another breathe before I turn my gaze towards the door and set off for the gardens where I'm either going to finally find the answers I've been seeking.

I can only hope that the truth isn't going to be as ugly as I fear it might be.

* * *

"Katherine?" I call out as I enter the garden.

The sound of my footfalls, small echoes against the chipping and cracked red-brown paving stones that line the pathway in this part of the gardens are the only response that I receive in sound. A quick peek at the area that surrounds me reveals only the barren soil, glinting with hints of frost in the weak dawn light, on either side of the abnormally wide footpath trailing through this portion of the gardens.

Did she not come? I wonder as I take a few more steps into the garden.

"Katherine?" I call out again, louder this time, as I scan the area for any signs that she could have passed through here recently but even as I approach the gazebo, the only response I'm met with is the echoes of my footfalls reverberating through the otherwise silent garden. My eyes dart around, looking at the trees as I continue to walk along the well-worn path. A few leaves lazily float down to the ground as I pass, the bright colours of the ones that still clinging to the trees a sharp contrast to the dead and decaying world of the ground. It feels almost wrong to be disturbing this sanctuary of peace and stillness.

"Kat?" I try, calling out for her as loudly as I can, my voice wavering as I shiver from the cold breeze that comes howling through the quiet gardens. The winds almost deafening after the silence of the garden, the trees moaning in indignation as the quiet haven being disturbed by my presence, or perhaps by our presence if Katherine is indeed here. Slowly I round the corner, as the old cracked and faded wooden structure of the gazebo comes into view for the first time. There is someone there after all, but even when I squint I can't tell if it's Katherine or simply one of the other patient's family members escaping from the noise of the hospital for a little while.

"Katherine?" I call out as I take a few steps closer to the gazebo. The only response that I'm given in a bleary glance before the figure turns back to staring at the sky, their body hunching in a little further as another cold wind passes through the gardens.

"Katherine?" I try gently as I climb the three-steps steps necessary in order to enter the gazebo, each one creaking under my weight as I step onto them, my hand holding onto the rough wood of the railing. "Kat?"

"Lauren." She greets me in a melancholic tone, her back still facing me.

"Is everything alright?" I ask, concern for her superseding anything else as I take a few steps towards her. "Did something happen to Natalie?"

"No..." Katherine starts, her voice wavering and unsure before she trails off completely, her shoulders slumping further down as she leans more heavily against the railing in front of her. "She's fine. How's the kid?"

"Amelia? She's fine, her and Larry were asleep on a gurney last I checked. Are you sure about Natalie?" I ask as I take what little of her I can see in the dim light. Her clothing is rumpled and her shoulders hunched, I note as I take another step towards her. I can guess what she's going to look like when she finally turns to face me, bags under her eyes, her make-up, if she's wearing any, smeared. This is a play that I've seen acted out far to many times by far to many different actors and it almost invariably has a sad ending.

"This is so anti-climactic don't you think?" She asks as she tilts her head upward, a sigh escaping from her lips as she continues to stare up at the sky, the small ponytail she's pulled her hair into brushing against the upturned collar of her shirt.

"That depends on your definition of anti-climactic doesn't it?" I respond as I try to see what she is looking at in the sky. "What's so interesting about the sky huh?"

"Nothing. I just can't look at you right now." She says, her tone slightly less mournful than before, as she straightens herself up. "I can't look at the damage that I've done."

"You decided this after the four times you've tried to talk to me?" I ask incredulous.

"You ran from me all those times." She responds before she slumps down again. "Something you never would have done before me."

I stiffen and close my eyes. She doesn't know I've run before, and that I still run now. I take a breathe and try to seal the surfacing memories back in their small box at the corner of my mind and banish them back into the darkness of my past. No need to relieve them, no need to remember them. I'm Lauren Lewis, that is who I am now, not that person, not that girl not anymore.

"You don't know that." I murmur as I walk closer to her, one of my hands reaching out to touch her back in a reflex left over from the past. "You...

"Don't even try the 'You don't know me' bullshit Lauren.' We were together for three years, friends for a year before that. I know you, not as well as Blondie does, but I do know you." She fires back at me before turning around to face me. I frown at the sight in front of me, the bags heavy under her eyes, although she does appear make-up free.

"Are you sure you're okay?" I ask her again. I don't want to have this conversation right now if I'm not sure she's fit to be having it. I can't even imagine the stress of having Natalie in the hospital and trying to have this talk with me after what is likely an all-nighter for her as well.

"I'm fine Lauren." She mumbles, her voice barely above a whisper. Katherine looks me over once before she turns her back to me, shoulders slumping once again as if they are carrying the weight of the world on them.

The silence that envelopes us is like an oppressive cloak of silence held in place by the demons that haunt us, unwilling to let us talk about them in order to banish them to the underworld.

"Can I ask you something?" She finally queries, her voice barely an echo of its usual volume.

"What do you want to know?" I ask closing the distance between us physically as the chasm in my mind that has been separating us for so long vanishes as we stand on level ground for perhaps the first time in the entirety of our relationships.

"Why now? Why now of all times do you stop running from me?" She asks, turning her head so that she can face me as I lean against the railing next to her.

"Tamsin." I respond, shrugging.

"Should have guessed that one." She says, the first hints of a smirk appearing as the corner of her mouth twitches in amusement. "She always was good at getting you to do things you didn't want to. So do you just want to ask? Or do you want me to start?"

"With what?"

"I think I'm sorry is a place to start, don't you?" She responds as she shrugs her shoulders, leaning further onto the flat top of the fence that encloses us in this place. "I don't expect you to get it, and you don't have to try. The way we ended, the fact that I destroyed us and our friendship. That is _all_ my fault."

I sigh as I move my eyes away from her and towards the horizon, unable to look at her anymore.

"It's funny." I begin. "Because if we'd had this conversation three weeks ago I wouldn't have gotten it, but now I do. I know why, maybe not the reasons you chose to end it the way you did, but why you did it I understand that."

"No you don't L, not really." She tells me, her voice heavy with sadness as her shoulders slump and her back visibly tightens as she curls herself against the railing. "What I did was crap, and the justification I used in order to convince myself to do it was probably even worse. The real reason I did it is because I'm a coward who couldn't face you in the end, who couldn't stand to break your heart face-to-face. So I ran instead of fulfilling the promise I made you after our first time together."

"So after all of this time you're telling me the reason you left a note is because you were a coward?"

"Yes…" She responds as she turns to face towards the sky growing brighter as above us as the darkness of night fades.

"That should have been obvious I guess." I say as I look at her over my shoulder before allowing my eyes to drift in the opposite direction and to look at the still black night sky of the direction I'm facing. There is only the barest hints of azure starting to appear I note as I continue to stare at the sky

"We were going to end from the start weren't we?" I finally ask, as I continue to look at the heavens above us. "You and I were at two different stages in life, I was just finishing medical school while you had already established your practice. You were ready to settle down, I... had so many years of schooling left that it didn't seem worth it to pursue more then a casual fling."

Despite that attitude though she had somehow managed to talk me into a serious and long-term relationship, my first one at that.

The barest of touches on my shoulder, catches me off guard and pulls me out of my mind and causes me to turn towards Kat. The corners of her lips are upturned in a small smile as a few sparks of amusement appear in her eyes. "You want to rehash that discussion? Really?! You know that has nothing to do with anything L, I told you I was fine with waiting and I was, still am, Natalie's not as young as you but she's still younger than me. We're not quite at the same place in life yet but we're making it work just like I made it work with you."

I shake my head. "What I was trying to-"

Katherine cuts me off, as she begins to laugh, the bell like sound a familiar and welcome noise. "None of that has to do with why I ended it. I was ready to fight for you and for us until the end but... well everything changed."

"You met your soulmate, Natalie." I say as I move my eyes away from her to fixate once again on the dark cloak of the night sky, the side not yet being touched by the banishing rays of the sun.

"I met my soulmate." Katherine confirms.

I close my eyes and nod, her statement validating a hypothesis that I've held for as long as I've known about Natalie and their connection. "You left me because you meet your soulmate. No other reason?"

"There were others L, and while they weren't minor, our communication issues for example, they weren't something that necessarily would have split us up." She says, her voice firm in its resolution.

"But it stopped being worth it to fight for me and for us when you met her?."

Katherine's eyes soften as one of her hands reaches out to squeeze my shoulder lightly. "As horrible as this sounds? Pretty much."

I sigh as I turn to face her. "So everything was as fine as it got for us at that stage, up until you met her? And that was near the end?"

"Mhmm... no, it was six months before." She says. "I am so sorry Lauren..."

I close my eyes, blinking rapidly as I realize what she is implying. The sheer concept of what she's saying is hard enough to stomach, but the reality is so much more upsetting.

"You cheated on me?" I ask as I blink my eyes open, tilting my head so I can look her in the eyes properly for the first time. Her eyes move upward to meet mine, shinning with unshed tears, before her eyes close and she nods hear head slowly, regretfully, a few tears trailing down her cheeks.

"I'm sorry. I'm not going to try and make any excuses. You deserved so better then that." She says, a few tears rolling down her own cheeks.

"But it's almost impossible to resist them, to resist the temptation they represent." I whisper, my hands clenching at the rough, solid wood underneath my palms.

"Yeah. It really kind of it. And right now it seems like a mixed blessing because when I got Natalie... well I lost you through my own cowardliness." She laughs bitterly. "You were my best friend for a long time, and for a while it was... weird living without you."

"I know what you mean. It was... hard to say the least." I say, glancing at the sky, repressing the memories of those dark days and weeks that came afterwards.

"I think I know a little bit about what you mean. But the most ironic thing? I probably wouldn't go back and change anything if I could." She says, her lips being drawn into a tight, thin line. "I'm sorry but I wouldn't."

"It really is impossible to resist them isn't it?" I say, smiling through the tears that continue to trail down my cheeks. Reaching down I begin to fiddle with my watch strap, loosening it enough to pull it away and reveal the almost healed mark underneath it. "I met her Kat."

And for the first time in nearly two years I see a genuine smile tug at her lips as she walks over to me, kneeling down in front of me.

"Can I?" She asks as she reaches out to grab my wrist, hesitating before her hand can wrap around mine, I nod once, and move it towards her, allowing her warm, familiar, hands to cradle mine. Gently she reaches out and slides the watch a little further up my arm, exposing the mark to the freezing air that surrounds us. I can't help but hiss in pain at the unwelcome sensation of the cold air against my still healing skin. "Oh Lauren, it's beautiful. So you found her huh?"

"Yeah." I say as I smile, reaching up with the hand that isn't being held between both of Kat's to wipe away the tears that were escaping from my eyes.

"She's beautiful." I laugh as I look down at my mark. "And you know what you said? It was the same thing I thought the first time I saw her mark, that it was beautiful. And then I nearly kissed her and collapsed on the floor, apparently in a pool of my own blood."

Katherine's eyebrows arch up as wrinkles form between them, her lips tugging downward in a frown, as she continues to stare down at my mark. "You're not serious are you?"

I sigh before nodding. "Unfortunately."

"Where?"

"Here."

"Oh god please tell me you didn't get branded as a Larry after all the hard work you've put into this!"

"No!" I say as I chuckle quietly. "That happened back in medical school, it wasn't Larry's fault our prof was clinically insane!"

I'd forgotten how easy it is to talk to Katherine. I seem to have forgotten a lot of things about her, turning her into the villain of my story and forgetting that she has her side as well. I smile as I lock eyes with her, the ones that sparkle with a joy I haven't seen in them since just before those last six-months of our relationship.

"You take care of yourself okay L?" She says as she releases my wrist and begins to stand-up from her place on the floor. "My number is the same in case you ever need me."

"I seriously doubt that." I say before smiling at her painfully. "But thank-you."

"After all I've done? I'm lucky you're not yelling at me right now. But I'm here if you ever need an impartial ear." She says as she begins to walk away.

"Thank-you" I murmur as I stand-up and begin to walk out of the gazebo before I stop, turning my eyes towards the sky. I watch as the sun begins to rise from below the horizon and the soft pink of predawn fades into a darker pink-red, against the backdrop of the scattered clouds in the sky. The darkness of night begins to fade from black to sky blue as the first rays of the sun begin to creep over the horizon, casting long shadows on the ground the surrounds me.

My breathe is caught in my chest at the rare beauty I'm witnessing as the trees begin to glint, the dew, or perhaps it is frost after all, sparkling as the sun begins its steady and rhythmic climb through the sky, the same one that it has done since Earth was born and will do until our planet meets its fiery demise. Glancing down at my wrist I slowly tilt it towards the sun, letting the weak but warm rays touch my marked skin for the first time.

I smile when out of the corner of my eye I catch sight of the glowing ball of light bouncing up and down in happiness.

* * *

"Lauren!" Tamsin calls out as I startle awake.

"Whaa?" I mumble, rolling over and away from the noise as my eyes begin drifting closed again, my eyelids still heavy with sleep and exhaustion causing them to drop well past half-mast quickly. "Sleep is good for you."

"Oh for… are you sleep-talking again?" She asks me, her voice indignant.

"Radio-nucleotides." I say as I roll over to face away from Tamsin, hoping she'll think I'm only responding to her because of my somniloquy.

"Yeah I'm sure Scrubs. Try something more impressive and I might actually believe you're asleep." Groaning I roll towards the dip in my mattress, Tamsin sitting on the other side of the bed no doubt. "How long have you been home?"

Blinking I bring one of my hands underneath my side and try to force myself into a sitting position, only to collapse half into Tamsin a second later as my hand gives out under my weight.

"Not long enough obviously." I say as I close my eyes and roll away from her, the mattress squeaking with my every movement. "I've only been asleep for two hours."

"You get caught overtime?"

"No." I mumble as I snuggle back into the hard pillow behind me. Shifting around again I try to find a comfortable position on the firm mattress below me as my eyes once again grow heavy with sleep. I need to get some sleep now and more tonight or else I won't be able to cope at all when I start on day-shift tomorrow. But as I curl in on myself and try to drift back off to sleep the weight on my bed doesn't shift, giving me any indication that Tamsin is standing-up and going away. Silently I move one of my arms and hold up the covers in the direction Tamsin is sitting in.

"Not this time princess. You need to wake-up because your girlfriend keeps calling you." Blinking my eyes open again I roll towards Tamsin, who is wearing an annoyed expression on her face.

"We haven't talked about what we are yet, Tamsin." I mutter as I blink my eyes open and force myself into a semi-sitting position, my head barely propped up by the pillow.

"Is she really calling me or are you just trying to wake me up?" I ask, a small flutter in my chest at the thought of seeing Bo again. We haven't really had the chance to talk about meeting again, given her schedule and mine rarely left us enough time to talk to each other, let alone see each other in real-life.

"Yes."

"To which one?"

"She hasn't actually been calling."

I sigh in disappointment. "So then why exactly are you waking me up?"

"Because we're not in your bedroom?"

"Huh?" I say as I sit up.

"You fell asleep on the floor. Ciara and I pulled out the couch and dumped you in it. You're welcome by the way." I glance over at her, and through the living room.

"How exactly did I manage to fall asleep on the floor?"

"We think you were on the couch, but rolled off at some point just before we woke up."

"I don't remember falling asleep on the couch." I say as I frown. "Actually I don't remember coming home."

"That would explain why you're still in scrubs. How long did they keep you at the hospital for?"

"It wasn't the hospital that needed me to stay. I ran into Katherine."

"Why on earth? No wait she was injured or hurt wasn't she? Or was it that woman she's with now… what's her name again?"

"Natalie."

"Right her."

"Natalie had a concussion and right now I don't really want to talk about this." I mumble as I push myself further up onto the bed, leaning against the hard back of the couch, my body protesting the movements.

"Why exactly did you pull this thing out instead of just putting me back on the couch?" I ask as I shift around, trying to find a comfortable position where the dull throbbing of my muscles would quiet.

"Ciara's idea. Something about you being way to active in your sleep." I sigh and nod.

"I'm not even going to ask how you got me on the bed."

"Yeah that's probably for the best." Tamsin says as she stands-up. "You want something for breakfast before I leave?"

"No thanks. It's my turn to make dinner tonight right?" I ask her as I lay back down on the pull out couch.

"Ciara said she would cover it. The last thing we want is another kitchen fire." Tamsin says. "There's well cooked and than there's that monstrosity."

"Wait I thought that was Ciara and the pasta monster." I say as I shudder at the memory of the pasta dish Ciara had tried to make once when she had come off of a thirty-hour day at an internship.

She had fallen asleep as the pasta had cooked. Tamsin had come home before anything bad could happen, but when the pot lid was opened well. Let's just say the pasta looked more like something out of a horror movie than an edible dish.

It was promptly decided that nobody was allowed to cook after they had come off of a night-shift or a twenty-four-hour or longer workday.

Tamsin looks confused for a moment before her eyes light up in recognition. "Right you weren't the one responsible for that were you?"

"Not as far as I know." I say. "Unless I fell asleep while I was cooking at some point."

"I don't think you've ever fallen asleep while you're cooking." Tamsin says as she sits back down on the bed.

"Yeah well considering we normally schedule the cooking so that I'm not the one responsible for dinner when I'm on night-shift. Don't we also try and schedule you so that you're not cooking dinner when we know you have to work overnight?." I ask her.

"Yeah yeah Scrubs." Tamsin says as she reaches out to pat me on the knee over my blankets. "I know."

"So what-" Tamsin says before my phone beginning to vibrate on the table next to the couch cuts her off. Glancing over at the number I feel my heart leap up in my chest when I see the name that has appeared on my screen. Reaching over I quickly grab it tapping at the green icon to answer the phone.

"Lo?" A familiar voice on the other end of the line asks. As quickly as I can I press the phone closer to my ear, a smile tugging at my lips as my heart begins to flutter in my chest.

"Hi Bo." I whisper fondly into the phone, glaring at Tamsin and moving in an attempt to shoo her away from me.

She smirks at me, her eyes glinting mischievously. I roll my eyes before mouthing to her, "I'll talk to you later alright?"

Tamsin rolls her eyes again before she walks over to her bedroom and shuts the door, muttering something about stupid soulmates. I huff in laughter at Tamsin, smiling gratefully despite the fact that she couldn't see me.

"What's so funny?" Bo asks on the other end of the phone, the amusement and fondness in her voice palpable.

"My roommate was just telling me how she and her girlfriend had to put me to bed this morning."

"Night-shift again?"

"Yeah." I reply, cradling the phone to my ear as I smile, a warm fuzziness is beginning to settle in my stomach as we continue to talk.

"You sound good for someone who was up all night." She says, a smile in her voice before it turns into a frown. "I didn't wake you up did I?"

"No she did." I say into the phone. "Although for reasons I'm not completely sure of."

"She's been your roommate for seven years now?"

"Pretty much, with one exception, but yes we've lived together more or less continuously for the last seven years."

Bo chuckles sadly on the other end. "Kenzi and I have you beat on that one. Eleven years."

"Wait Kenzi doesn't look like she's older then twenty-two or twenty-three."

"She isn't. It's a long and very complicated story." She replies, her voice distant on the other end of the phone. She is present enough to converse with me but her mind has wandered away.

"Sorry." I murmur into the phone. "I didn't mean to bring up bad memories."

There is only silence on the other end of the phone.

"Bo?" I say into the phone, my voice frantic with worry.

Silence once again. I move my hand away from the phone, catching it between my ear and my shoulder, as my hand wanders over to fiddle with the watch still well fastened to my wrist.

The tightly woven fabric is warm to the touch and smooth as I begin to run my fingers over it as I start to move the watch around my wrist.

Is she alright?

Is something happening to her on the other end of the phone?

My mind begins to wander, wondering what could have happened to cause to stop responding to me.

"Bo?" I try again, hoping to get a response from her this time. "Bo are you alright?"

"Sorry Lauren." She finally replies sounding startles as she speaks. "Just got lost in some memories."

"Don't be sorry Bo. I shouldn't have asked, it's none of my business."

There is another pause on the other line before I hear her voice filter through again, the happy tone it had taken on earlier returning in full force. "Guess we got side-tracked huh? I was just calling to ask if you wanted to go out with me tonight?"

"Yes!" I yell before I can stop myself and the sound of my voice ringing through the apartment loud enough to cause it to echo off the walls.

I could swear that I hear Tamsin snicker on the other end of the door.

I shake my head and massage the bridge of my nose lightly as Bo laughs on the other end of the phone. The sound of her laughter is light and carefree, a sharp contrast to the gloominess in her voice only a minute earlier. I can't help the smile that tugs at my lips as I listen to her laughter echo through the phone line, the microphone only distorting her voice a small amount.

"You're enthusiastic." She says, out of breath from laughing so hard at me. I can only smile; it is amazing how she can go from distant to happy within a few sentences.

"Am I not allowed to want to see you?"

"Mhmm… there is more then one way to _see_ me." She jokes on the other end. I can only smirk in amusement at the innuendo that I don't fully understand.

"What exactly does that mean?" I reply, my voice dropping slightly as we begin to flirt with each other over the phone.

"Why don't you find out?" She breathes. My stomach to drop at the tone in her voice, a nervous flutter settles into my chest, and my mouth goes dry.

The affect this woman has on me…

"Where?" I finally ask her as I swallow, a noise that echoes that echoes through my body.

"Do you know the Dahl Riata?" She asks.

"No." I respond, pushing myself a little further up as I lean back against the worn cushions of the couch, as a warmth rushes through me a the thought of seeing her again. It has been to long despite the fact that it has only been days.

"Then why don't I pick you up at say seven doctor?" She husks into the phone. I gulp again at the tone that she has taken on, her voice warm and heavy with something, lust, my mind supplies me with, but I quickly banish the thought. She barely knows me, just as I barely know her.

Although this night might be another chance to get to know each other.

And as nice as the idea of being picked up by her sounds…

"How about you text me the address and I meet you there." I respond.

"Hmm this is going to be interesting isn't it?" She responds a moment later, before her voices changes back to its normal tone and she adds. "I'll see you then alright Lo?"

"It's a date."

"I should hope so!" She responds, her voice full of mock horror.

"See you tonight Bo."

"See you Lauren." She replies, hesitating for a moment before she hangs up her phone. I pull the device away from my ear and then hold it in front of me as I stare down at it, the surreal nature of everything that has just come to pass hitting me.

"I have a date with Bo tonight." I say as I stare down at my phone, the sound and feel of the vibration running through my hand as Bo texts me the address to the Dahl, only adding to the bizarre turn this morning has taken. "I have a date."

* * *

"Here?." I mutter to myself as I glance down at the phone again, rereading the green bubble of the text message that Bo sent me earlier this afternoon. "Am I even in the right place?"

Lifting my phone up I position it next to the grey GPS sitting on the dashboard of my car. My eyes flit between the two as I compare the location to the address on the text message and the one displayed in white lettering on the old digital screen in front of me.

"You have reached your destination." The monotone voice tells me once again. "You have reached your destination."

"Thank-you." I say in response before I reach over to turn it off, the seatbelt digging into my collarbone as I move my arm. Scanning the run down exterior of the buildings in front of me once again I can't help but be reminded of some of the seedier clubs that Tamsin used to drag me to when we were younger. The crumbling concrete that forms the facade of the buildings, and the neon lights that surrounds them. I can see the small LLBO sign in the bottom corner of the covered windows of some of the places in this area, but nothing that would indicate a pub bearing the name of the Dahl Riata.

Glancing around once last time I reach up and turn the car off and pull the keys out of the ignition. Reaching out I push open the door and pull myself out of the car, my boots barely making a sound as they hit the concrete on this dusty side road. Looking around again a small fluttering begins in my stomach, nervous at what is about to happen.

I tug at the leather jacket that I'm wearing, trying to pull it a little closer to me over my button-down shirt, as I curse myself for deciding to wear such a thin coat. Unfortunately in my nervousness I had forgotten to check the weather to see what the temperature was going to be this evening.

And that came back to haunt me I note bitterly as I shiver against the wind. I take a quick peek around before I make my way towards the only indicator that this place is perhaps more than another bar, the old door of wood, an ancient relic against a newer concrete building.

"Fascinating." I say as I walk towards the door, my hand reaching out to trace the wood, worn smooth from age, against my fingers. My hand drifting over the door, as I take in the cold and rusting metal of the iron hinges.

How did it get here of all places? And what is it made of in order for it to have lasted here for this long?

"Is the door that interesting?" A friendly voice calls out from behind me. Turning around on my heel I smile brightly when I see the person standing across from me.

"Bo. Hello!" I say as I move away from the door, a sheepish smile tugging at my lips. "I was just…"

"Fascinated by the door to the Dahl?" She says with a laugh. "What about it exactly is so interesting?"

"It's age, and it's appearance. I was wondering where the owner managed to get this from, or where it got it commissioned, the replica work is so intricate and real." I say as I begin to babble about the door, and my speculations of where it could be from in history, or what it could be based off of.

Bo laughs before she reaches out to grab the handle on the door. "You're cute when you geek out."

I smile at her and walk over to her.

"Ready to get this date started?" She asks me, as she reaches over and grabs the handle on the old door.

Nodding I reply. "Lead the way M'lady."


	7. Chapter 7

"Is there any particular reason you invited me here?" I ask as we fully step into the Dahl, the wave of heat that hits us a welcome contrast to the harsh winds outside.

"Other then the fascinating architecture?" She jokes, as I tilt my head back, taking in the old-style ceiling. The one with the visible wooden slats and the visible support-beams. I can already feel my mind beginning to spin, trying to conjure up the possibility of what this place used to be, when it was built, and why. It truly is a beautiful place, and the architecture is much more fascinating then the average bar or pub that I've been taken to over the years. The atmosphere as well is a lovely contrast, this place is well lit, but there is something about the happy chatter and the uproarious laughter that creates a welcoming feel to this place.

"This place really does remind me of some of the more authentic pubs that I've been dragged to by a friend of mine." I reply as I look around, taking in the green-leather booths that line the back wall, and the high tables that rest closer to the counter. "British, a bit of a stickler for a good pub."

Bo laughs. "That sounds like someone I know. She really did love a good pub, once you found one it was impossible to drag her away from it most of the time, at least until she got blind-drunk."

"Yeah." I say as I simply take in the small details of the place that we're standing in, the scuffs on the old hard-wood, the slightly mis-matched nature of the chairs and tables, the smell of alcohol and air-freshener that permeates the air. I would have to tell Ciara about this place, I'm sure she'd like it here, if nothing else then for the atmosphere.

"Wanna get a drink?" Bo asks, breaking the silence that has enveloped us. I glance over at her, blinking as I extricate myself from my wandering thoughts. I let out an apologetic murmur as I look down at our joined hands, nodding as I detangle our fingers.

"Lead the way darling." I jokingly say in a bad imitation of Ciara's accent.

Bo shakes her head in amusement, a smile tugging at her lips. "That sounds scarily like a woman that I knew once."

I shrug, passing it off as a coincidence, there might not be many British expats in town but there are enough that I doubt we're talking about the same woman. I take another moment to stare at the ceiling, admiring the craftsmanship, before beginning to make my way over to the bar, but Bo remains standing just inside the entrance to the Dahl, her eyes searching for something or someone, and just as I'm about walk back over and ask her what's going on she smiles, walking as fast as she can across the bar. Shaking my head I shrug and simply attribute it to the enigma that is Bo.

"There's someone that I want you to meet if that's okay." Bo queries slowly, almost as if she's afraid of scaring me.

"Who?" I ask, as I peek at the bar; the only person near it is the person standing behind the bar, the one I have to assume is the bartender, a short, older, balding man.

"My grandfather." She answers, trying to sound nonchalant, but there's an edge of worry in her voice as she speaks. I can't help but raise my eyebrows in surprise.

"It's a little early to be meeting the parents, well grandparent in this case, isn't it?" I ask Bo.

"I know it is, but the thing is he's kind of the owner of this place, and the bartender, so you're going to meet him when we go and get drinks anyway." She reasons, the suave and confident façade she puts on fading away as she nervously tries to persuade me to meet her grandfather at the bar.

I smile at her before I suggest. "How about we just order our drinks okay?"

"That sounds good." Bo replies, a look of relief crossing her visage before it settles once more into a confident smile. "What do you want?"

"Whatever you're having is fine with me." I respond, slightly overwhelmed by the sheer number of bottles that run across the back of the bar, the colourful labels in all sizes, the words and the letters leaping out at me in different fonts, are a little much to take in. And they are all blurring together at this distance anyways, making them nearly impossible to read.

Bo smirks at me once before she saunters over to the bar, her hips swinging with a swagger that can only come with a high-level of self-confidence. She crosses the room quickly, with a familiarity born of what I'm sure is many evenings spent here, in the company of her grandfather and her friend. A few of the people at the nearby tables lift their hands up in greeting when they see her, gestures she returns with a smile and a quick nod in their direction. I can see some of the eyes in the room drift to stare at her, and at her body, as she leans against the bar holding up her fingers for two of something. I bite my lip, trying to bite back an irrational anger that flares up within the pit of my stomach, something that demands that there eyes move on to stare at something else, something that isn't mine. But she isn't mine, not really. We're not together in any capacity, this could just as easily be considered a night out between friends as it could be a first-date.

I glare at one of the men nearby, staring at Bo's ass as she continues to lean against the bar, talking as the old man moves around behind it, his movements precise and practiced, graceful in a way that you can't normally see in the movements of a bartender. Bo eventually changes position, when the bartender waves his hand in the direction of one of the seats fixed in the ground in front of the counter, a fond smile on his lips as he does so.

She shifts, moving to straddle one of the stools, leaning on her elbow as she begins talks to the person who has come to sit next to her at the bar. I meet her eye when she shifts back to look at me, a small smile tugging at her lips as she does so, her eyes sparkling with something that I can't quite place. Turning around, she returns her attention to the person sitting beside her, a polite, apologetic smile tugging at her lips as she gestures in my direction, beckoning me to come over to the bar. I shake my head, trying to banish the jealousy that is bubbling up inside of me, dismissing the irrational feelings of possession over someone that I have no claim to as I begin to make my way forward.

I can barely hear the sound of my feet against the battered wooden floorboards as I cross the small space separating Bo and I, the sounds of the bar fading as I become lost in her shinning eyes, the same colour as liquid bromine. As I approach the bar I slide onto the wooden stool beside Bo, shifting slightly to try and get myself comfortable on the hard wooden seat, the heels of my boots catching on the round support below my chair.

"How is my darling granddaughter?" The barkeep asks as he places two tall glasses of pale brown liquid in front of us, the beer sloshing around as it adjusts its internal equilibrium, riding itself of the excess kinetic energy supplied to it from its movements prior to being placed on the countertop.

"She's good." Bo replies, a warm smile tugging at her lips as she leans against the sticky and stained bartop, one of her hands moving from her side to press lightly against my back as she does so. I can't help but shiver at the contact, the warmth of her hand seeping through my leather jacket and the blouse below it. "And how's my beloved grandfather?"

"He's well, thank-you." He replies, a smile similar to Bo's tugging at his lips as he seems to relax, his professional façade warming as the man begins to talk to his granddaughter. "And who would this be Bo?"

"Grandpa, this is Lauren, a… friend of mine." Bo begins, and I try to suppress the tinge of disappointment that runs through me, at the introduction as a friend. "And Lauren this is my grandfather Trick McCorrigan."

Trick… where have I….

Isabeau McCorrigan, Bo's grandmother. I wonder if this was the husband mentioned in the obituary? Shaking my head I clear away the thoughts and reach out, offering my hand as I smile pleasantly in greeting at the man in front of me.

"It's pleasure to meet you." I say as I feel a warm, solid hand reach out and grab my own in a powerful grip, squeezing it lightly as he gives me a strong, but firm handshake. His hands are rough against my own, smoother ones. I wonder if he does more then just bartending?

"It's a pleasure to meet the woman that has my granddaughter so smitten." He says politely, his voice is warm and welcoming but his eyes remain hard, not cold, but not welcoming either. I smile politely as I withdraw my hand from his.

"The pleasure is all mine." I reply, as I look over at Bo, a small warmth blooming in my chest when I see her eyes shinning again, the same way they did in the park that night we met in person for the first time, and she introduced me to Kenzi.

"So how did you two meet? My granddaughter has been rather secretive about everything involving you, as has her friend." He tells me, as he prods me, searching for answers. I glance over at Bo, shaking my head as she smiles at me.

"It's kind of a long story Trick." Bo says, as she reaches out, grabbing her beer and taking a sip. "And we are here for a reason."

"I'm sure you can tell an old-man one story. At the very least can you tell me what it is that you do Lauren? I'm sure you already know about my granddaughter." He says as he turns his gaze to me, an intense stare that seems to be trying to pry me open, to read me and to discern my attentions with his granddaughter.

I close my eyes and take a breath, I have dealt with far worse then overprotective grandfathers in my line of work. "I work in the ER of the local hospital."

"A nurse then?" Trick asks, his eyes lighting up slightly at the though as he looks over at Bo, his eyes shinning with a little more pride. "A noble profession, caring for those who are ill or injured. But it must be stressful as well."

"No actually I'm a doctor, a third-year resident in emergency medicine." I correct him gently. "Although I do agree with you about nursing."

Trick's eyes widen before he closes them, shaking his head in fondness as he looks over at his granddaughter, smiling widely as he does so. "Congratulations seem to be in order Bo, you somehow managed to net yourself a doctor!"

"Hey!" Bo growls in mock indignation.

"So Lauren…" Trick says as he begins to grill me, trying to find out as much as he can about me.

* * *

"Tamsin…?" I mutter slowly, blinking as I try to determine whether or not it's indeed my friend. I nearly spit the wine out of my mouth as I take in the familiar figure of my best-friend being, quite literally, dragged into the bar by her joined hand with her blonde-haired girlfriend.

"Ciara?" Bo stutters out, blinking rapidly as shakes her head in disbelief. She shifts herself up onto her knees as she grips at the back of the couch, her knuckles turning white from the strength of her grip. "But who…? I though she was… Where the hell is Dyson and who is that blonde?!"

"You know Ciara?" I ask slowly as I turn to face Bo, reaching over to press a hand to her back lightly, the warm, soft, cotton of her shirt a welcome and familiar sensation against my palm.

"I'm guessing you know who the blonde with her is?" She asks as she shifts back down to face me on the couch. I nod my head, as my hand slides down her arm from her back, before it comes to rest against the back of her left-hand, covering her hand with mine.

"That's Tamsin, her soulmate and girlfriend…" I begin before she interrupts me.

"And she's your roommate right? You failed to mention that your roommate has a girlfriend!"

"It never really came up did it?"I shrug incredulous before firing back my own question. "How exactly do you know Ciara?"

"Mutual ex." She mutters, her voice almost to low for me to hear. "We both dated the same guy."

"Let me guess, a certain Dyson Thornwood?" I ask.

"Yeah actually, how did you…?"

"Ciara ended up on our couch for a while after she and Dyson… broke-up." I mention to her absently, distracted as I try to figure out what the two of them are doing here.

"Small world isn't it?" Bo says as I feel the couch cushion shift next to me jostling as it sinks further into the frame against the additional weight. An hand wraps around my wrist, squeezing it lightly to try and get my attention. I can't help but smile when I turn my head towards Bo, who is smirking in amusement at me in turn, but that smirk quickly morphs into a flirty grinning as she asks in a husky, low voice that sends a shiver down my spin. "Now where were we?"

"Mhmm… I don't know. I think you were telling me about some of your research." I reply in an equally low tone, as I move, twisting my body so that I'm sitting on the couch, facing Bo, rather then leaning on the couch and spying on Tamsin and Ciara's date.

"Which part?" She replies as she leans forward, her body shifting closer to mine as she begins to invade my person space.

"I don't really remember…" I say as my eyes drift closed and I let the side my head falls back against the couch cushion, a smirk tugging at my lips.

"We're always talking about me, we're always asking about my research. Is it my turn to quiz you on your life-story?" Bo replies as I feel the cushion underneath me shifting as she reaches out, her fingers brushing some hair behind my ear before her hand begins to trail down my shoulder, her feather light touch igniting small sparks that dance across my skin even through two layers of clothing.

"What do you want to know?" I ask as I blink open my eyes again, my smirk turning into an awed smiling at the expression on her face, at the smile tugging at her lips, it was one of pure contentment, one that I'm not even sure she realizes she's wearing. I reach up and capture her teasing fingers, guiding them down to rest against one of my knees.

"Why did you choose emergency medicine of all things?" She asks, her voice filled with genuine curiosity. "Why not research? Or surgery?"

"Isn't that kind of a personal question?" I ask, grinning as I rest my cheek against my closed fist, my elbow supporting it's weight by resting against the back of the couch cushion.

"I thought that was what this date was for?" Bo teases, before her voice grows husky as she leans over whispering the second part in my ear. "So that we can get to know each other?"

I shudder at the tone of her voice, at the desire that echoes through my body, a willing vessel for its reverberating rings. I close my eyes letting out a breath as I try to get the fire within me under control, to douse the burning flames within me. She's right, the goal of this date is to get to know each other, not try and jump each other, although if she's trying to arouse me then she is doing an incredible job.

"Really now?" I ask jokingly as I finally regain control of myself. "Because I was under the impression this was you trying to get in my pants."

"Well doctor I've been told that I'm shockingly good in bed if you want to skip right to that part." She says as she wiggles her eyebrows causing me to smile in amusement.

"Hmm... as tempting as that offer sounds." I begin as I continue to smile. "I really do want to hear more of your story."

"And I want to hear more of yours doctor, so spill, tell me something about you!" She fires back, laughing as she speaks.

"Do you really want to hear my story?" I ask her. "Because it's kind of boring to be honest, something that you could easily find on TV and with only a few minor changes it could be my story."

"Yeah I'm sure, it may have been one I've heard before but it's not one that I've heard _you_ tell before" She replies gently as she moves her hand away from my knee and up to grab one of my own. I can't help the grin that tugs at my lips when I look down and see our fingers tangled together, and can't help but think how right it looks, how her hand fits in mine like they were made for each other.

"It's funny that you brought up research actually, because that was my original plan after medical school was to pursue a research position. But then I began my elective rotation in emergency medicine…" I begin as the memory comes back, of my first shift on an elective rotation through the ER. "It was my first day and... well let's just say that it was an interesting one."

"So you feel in love with the rush of the ER?" Bo asks as lets go of my hand, her fingers beginning to trace absently along the flesh of my palm, leaving small trails of fire as they stroke against my skin. Her hand in mine is distracting, and makes it hard to recall the memory.

"I didn't fall in love with the rush of the ER and it wasn't because of the challenge that it provided. It was something that I saw on my first day, it was the way that I could such make a difference in someone's life, and the lives of their loved ones. My current attending, the one who stitched you up the night I fainted, he was actually there back then too." I reply as I absently begin to play with Bo's fingers. It was an unconscious movement, a dance with rhythm that neither of us could understand, and yet one that we seem to know well.

"Near the end of the shift, just before five, we had an ambulance come in with a trauma or a heart-attack, I can't really remember what it was exactly. But the part that's stayed with me to this day is the fact that Dr. Nelson and his team preformed CPR on the man for 45 minutes after his heart stopped, despite all the training, not to mention the protocols, that told him to stop, he didn't." I say as I continue the story, the awe that I feel now still as potent, as palpable, as it was back then when I stood frozen watching him run the trauma that I was supposed to be helping on, but at some point I had gotten shoved aside.

"What happened?" She asks, her eyes wide with excitement like a child eager for the next chapter of a favourite story.

"They were able to bring the man back from the brink, Dr. Nelson was able to bring him back and get him stable enough to transport up to the OR. I ended up seeing him delivering the news to the patient's family as I left for the day, it was… I can't even begin to describe it."

"Can you try for me? You don't have to talk about the scene, just talk about your emotions, what you felt that day." She says, her voice suddenly stiff with professionalism. I smirk slightly, mixed feelings overwhelming me because on the one hand this is something that is soothingly familiar, something that Katherine used to try on me from time-to-time, but for that same reason it feels bittersweet because those semi-happy memories are tainted.

"I was amazed and in awe of what I was seeing. I saw these people standing in the waiting room, an older woman with two small children with her, twin girls." I murmur as I close my eyes, the image of that family sitting in the chair still as vivid as it had always been.

"Both of the girls were just sitting there, on the uncomfortable benches in the waiting room, they were sitting stock-still behind their pacing mother… they didn't even seem to understand what was going on because they were three, maybe four years old. I don't even know if their mother tried to explain it to them beyond that their Daddy was hurt." I say as I watch the memory play out before me.

"The mother was just pacing up and down the small stretch of the waiting room in front of her daughters' seats, the kids... they were so still, I hadn't even see such still kids that young before. I don't know what it was, maybe it was because she was just so stressed and agitated, I don't think she knew what was going on." I repeat, as I watch in my mind the woman in the business-suite pacing back-and-forth, her heels clacking rhythmically on the floor at almost the same pace as the clock, both of them ticking away the seconds as she waits for news.

"Dr. Nelson approached them." I murmur, as the scene plays out in front of me. The woman perks-up, walking over to him, looking like she was about to snap. "She had ignored me, or hadn't seen me, I was hiding behind one of the pillars near the entrance to the waiting room, it's near the locker rooms they dump the med students in when we have them there."

"You were hiding behind a pillar?" Bo asks, as her fingers brush across my palm in a long smooth stroke of her fingers, a gesture that I think was meant to be comforting but instead simply sent another shiver down my spin. "Why?"

"Honestly?" I question as I open my eyes, smiling as I catch her playful hand by the wrist, before I twist my hand and intertwine our fingers together in a loose hold. "I don't remember."

"Just one of those things?" She asks as she brings our joined hand down to rest against her thigh. "Hmm… I doubt that you did it with bad intentions, for some reason you don't strike me as someone who does something without a reason Dr. Lewis."

I smirk as I let go of her fingers, my own drifting upward until they reach her wrist. I look down as I begin to run my finger over the smooth skin covered by black, slightly rougher texture, of the mark. "You're right about that, but I can't remember what I was doing behind that pillar. I may have just been hiding from someone, my resident supervisor at the time most likely, Dr. Cormier, she's a researcher now I think, but I still see her around the hospital sometimes."

Bo laughs as she reaches out to grab her glass of wine, cupping the bottom the the glass as she lifts it from the table and to her lips. "This wouldn't happen to be Delphine Cormier would it?"

"Mhmm… maybe. I don't really remember her first name." I respond. "Does she have gorgeous curly blonde-hair, a thick French accent, but not the guttural sound of the Quebecois one? I think I've also seen her hanging around with a brunette in dreadlocks?"

"That sounds like her. I know the other woman you're talking about, she's a PhD student in the biology department at my university, we've talked a few times in between classes, we TA down the hall from each other." Bo replies. "Short? Brown with dreadlocks and a killer fashion sense?"

"That does sound like the person I saw with Dr. Cormier at the hospital a few times." I say.

"Anyways… how exactly did we get on the topic of Cosima and her girlfriend?" Bo asks.

"A combination of lowered inhibitions caused by alcohol and her name being brought up in a completely unrelated story." I respond as I continue to trace the inky pattern marring her otherwise beautiful skin.

"Right you were telling me about how you got into emergency medicine weren't you?" She murmurs as her hand grabs mine and intertwines our fingers, pressing our marked wrists together. I shudder at the feeling of my sensitive skin rubbing against hers, as warmth radiates through me from the contact before the feeling settling in my stomach, a warm fuzzy presence neither welcome nor unwelcome.

"It ended with Dr. Nelson telling the woman that we'd been able to revive her husband, that he'd survived and had even become stable enough that he we could transport him upstairs. I saw… I saw this angry, agitated, and from what I could gather, strong woman burst into tears, hugging Dr. Nelson and thanking him profusely." I begin. "It was… I can't really explain it but seeing the happiness on the woman's face, of the relief on her kids faces when she knelt down in front of them and told them that Daddy was going to make it… I knew he made a difference that day by fighting for that man as hard as he did."

"It changed something?" Bo asks.

"Yeah… it changed everything. Before that rotation, that night, I had enjoyed my time in the hospital, my rotations were all different and each one was interesting, but none of them ever felt right, they weren't something I would want to pursue a career"

Bo shrugs. "It sounds like you and I are opposites in that respect. I've always been fascinated by soulmates and their stories, how they found or find each other, how it was possible for them to know that this their match, because some of them never actually get the scan."

I smile as I grab Bo's wrist playfully, squeezing it before I let it go again as I catch her fingers with mine.

"Why?" Is the simple question I ask, the one that makes Bo smile at me as she begins to tell her own story. "I was actually raised by Trick and my grandmother, so I guess you could say that I grew up with the idea that finding you're soulmate wasn't impossible."

I shrug silently, different people instil and pass along different ideas to their children in regard to the possibility of soulmates.

"They loved each other, fiercely, and passionately, the kind of love that you can only dream about even if you do meet your soulmate, the kind you see on TV shows." She continues, a distant, nostalgic smile crossing her lips as her eyes glaze over, becoming lost in memories. "I got to watch them fall in love with each other a little more each day as I grew up, they were perfect for each other, and despite how hard it was for them, to have to become parents all over again, they did their best to raise me, always support me and they let me pursue my dreams."

I smile I can see that happiness and warmth must have pervaded her childhood, her eyes grow misty as she moves on. I can also feel a small twinge of jealousy and a rush of sadness rise up within me, but it's easy to suppress, to force back into the area of my mind I have long banished those feelings and memories to "Even as I grew up and the fairy-tale notion of soulmates faded and reality began to filter in more and more I never lost my fascination with them and the stories that they brought with each new pair, or well group in a few cases, that I talk to for my research."

I smile as I reach out, pushing away some of her hair from her forehead. "It sounds like your doing what you love. I never really cared that much to be honest, soulmate matches aren't always…"

"Aren't always what?" Bo prods gently.

"Good unions." I sigh, shrugging as my head falls against the pillow.

"That is true, but it's only something I've ever read about in case-studies honestly, they're just so rare." She says. "But I do feel bad for the kids produced by those matches, they rarely turn out okay, there's still so much stigma attached to matches divorcing, especially if you have the scan to back up the feelings that you get when you're together."

"Yeah I do too." I murmur.

"You've seen the worst-case in the ER haven't you?" She asks, in a tone that I'm sure is meant to be questioning, but it sounds more like a statement then anything else.

"I have unfortunately." I reply as her hand beginning to run up and down my arm soothingly.

"That sucks." She says. "And it didn't help the whole unmarked thing either did it? I can only imagine what it would be like living without one."

"It's not so bad." I say, smiling reassuringly. "You figure out ways to get by, and to avoid the questions. You learn how to cover it."

"Is that what the watch is?" She asks, referring to the timepiece now resting on its face, the Velcro strap sticking straight-up, on the small, dented, and scratched table in front of us.

"Yeah. It was a trick that I figured out shortly after I turned sixteen, I was just finishing grade eleven, people were always staring at my wrist, and the people who knew me, when my birthday was, they kept asking when my mark was going to come in. So one day I decided to test a hypothesis, wear a watch, cover the area, see what happens."

"And it worked."

"Yes it did." I reply, smiling. "I was so proud when my hypothesis proved to be correct."

"I can picture that, teenage Lauren laughing happily because one of her sciency hypotheses ended up working" She laughs. "I should remember to pass along that trick to my clients if it ever comes up."

"You have a practice?" I ask, surprised, and slightly worried.

"No. Not yet at least. I'm not sure if I ever want one honestly."

"So what are you planning on doing in the future then?"

"I dunno, I've been so focused on finishing school that I've never really thought about it." She replies. "I guess when Trick dies I'll inherit this place, but hopefully that won't be for a while yet."

"Do you think you'll do research?" I ask as I lean over and grab my glass of wine.

"Maybe" She replies shrugging again before adding. "Or I could teach. I enjoy being a TA, although it's not quite as much fun as bartending was."

"You were a bartender?" I ask.

Bo shrugs. "Had to pay the bills somehow during undergrad, and despite the sometimes boring nature of the job some of the stories that people would tell me certainly made it worth it. What about you?"

"What do you mean?"

"Do you have any interesting stories from you're undergrad days?"

"I had a scholarship that covered most of my tuition, whatever it couldn't cover I used OSAP to pay." I shrug, that part was fairly typical and still is. "Although I did take care of my living expenses by working part-time at the campus library. It wasn't much, but it was enough to get by on."

"I can picture you as a librarian." Bo replies as she closes her eyes, nodding to herself. "A sexy, sexy librarian."

I smile, reaching out to push her on the shoulder gently. "Try I sat at an information desk all day with a textbook for company most days, our campus library wasn't always the most popular of places."

"I still find it incredibly sexy, the idea of you walking around in a pencil skirt, glasses perched on your nose, shushing everyone." Bo replies, her expression completely serious as she speaks. Perhaps it's only the alcohol, coursing through my veins and giving me a false sense of courage brought on by lowered inhibitions from depression of the central nervous system, but I burst out laughing at her words. It's amazing how easy it is to talk to her, to allow everything to come spilling out of my mouth, to tell her things and stories that I didn't tell Katherine, that only Tamsin, and sometimes Ciara, knew about before her.

"Is it crazy of me to say that this feels easy, like this is where I should be?" She asks me as she leans closer to me, her breath suddenly warm against my lips, her forehead pressed against mine as our noses brush together in the moments before I close my eyes and shake my head as I lean in to her, her nose gently bumping against mine. My breath hitches as I press myself closer to her, tilting my head to the side as I close the fleeting distance between us, pressing our lips together in a slow but heady kiss. She responds almost immediately, returning the kiss as he arms wrap around my shoulder, tugging me closer to her as she nips at my bottom lip possessively, causing me to let out an appreciative sigh in response. Bo's other arm wraps around my waist as her hand settles against my hip. Her other hand moves lower, coming to rest on my other side, opposite the one already resting there. Her hungry hands tugging at my hips, trying to pull me into her lap. Sighing, instead of giving into her I wrap my arms around her waist and pull her close to me, shifting so that we're chest-to-chest, pressed close enough that I wonder if she can hear the heartbeat that is echoing in my chest, the heart that is pounding beneath my breast as it tries to escape.

I want her.

I want her so much right now.

I want to get to know her in the most intimate ways that I possibly can. I want to know everything about her, I want to keep talking, but I also want to feel her naked skin against mine.

I can hear a wolf-whistle in the distance, breaking the spell she has cast on me, and reminding me of where exactly we are, and how inappropriate this is for the place we're in.

"Bo…" I moan as I pull away from her, shifting my weight onto my knees as I move away from her, breaking the contact between us in a vain attempt to stave off the flames of desire that have ignited like an inferno within me. "We need to stop."

"Sorry." She replies between heavy breathes, as she moves herself further back on the couch, putting a small amount of distance between us. "It's hard to control myself around you."

I smile, as I close my eyes trying to calm my racing heart, leaning my forehead against the cool, soft, fabric of the cushion my shoulder is resting against. "That seems to keep happening, our first meeting, right now."

"God I want you, but I want to know you too. It sort of sounds insane doesn't it?" Bo asks as she shifts, her knees bumping against mine as she moves herself closer to me, curling up on the couch.

"No not really, I feel the exact same way." I murmur in reply as I reach over, not opening my eyes as I rest my hand against her knee, squeezing it gently. "We're going to need to do something about it aren't we?"

"Yeah we are." Bo responds, her voice low, thick with desire. I blink open my eyes, to meet her gaze, but close them as soon as I see her eyes, the ones staring into mine. The look of desire in them ignites the fire in my core anew and I have to close my eyes and take a breath as I chase away the visions I have of pining her to this couch and taking her right here and right now.

"This isn't something I've ever felt before." I mutter. "Not this… burning, all-consuming, desire for someone."

"Never?"

"Never. Not like this, not this strongly." I sigh, as I fix my gaze on her.

"It's only going to get harder from here I guess. You know I called you this morning because I missed you?" Bo says. "I missed hearing your voice, I missed _you_ and the crazy part is I've known you for a month, and I already find it hard to be apart."

I sigh as I close my eyes. "I doubt this is going to make it easier but I'm on the day shift for the next two weeks, which does mean that I can spend at least some of an evening with you if you don't mind it being a study-date."

"What are we? In high-school?" Bo asks mockingly as she leans against the couch. "But I get it I guess, we're both still students after all, even at the ripe old-age of twenty-nine."

"Speaking of students, our schedules. How are we going to make this work if we can barely talk to each other? Between the time we met in the park and your call this morning we went nearly a week without more then a few texts." I sigh, hating that I already have to bring up the time conflict issue. It was almost easier in some ways, being in medical school and trying to hold down a job, and balancing a newly forming relationship as opposed to being a resident, especially given the long, sometimes grueling, hours that I have to work.

"We'll it should be a little easier for the next couple of weeks given that you won't be nocturnal right?" Bo asks. I can only sigh and shake my head in response.

"One of my colleagues, Larry, his daughter's sick, so I may have to cover his shifts for the next little while…"

"Let me guess, he's still working nights?"

"Yeah, he has a little girl, so it's harder for him to work nights, so I trade shifts with him when he needs me to, and right now is one of those times."

Bo sighs. "We could try to put this off until I'm done with my doctorate. Try and just be friends…"

I close my eyes and sigh. Maybe that would be for the best, Bo has roughly another year left by her estimates, and I have two more before my boards…

I shake my head at the overwhelming sadness that consumes me at the idea of remaining only friends with her, at the thought of not begin _with_ her. "Not unless you really don't want to give this a try Bo. I want to try, but if…"

"Then we'll try this." She replies, a dazzling, amazing, breathtakingly beautiful smile tugs at her lips as she places her hand over mine on her knees, squeezing it as she gently turns it over, tangling our fingers together.

"So…" I begin, before the loud clash of pool balls smacking together interrupts me. I laugh as my eyes drift back over towards Tamsin and Ciara, Tamsin laughing as Ciara tries, badly, to shoot at the pool balls with the queue. I smile in amusement as I watch them for a second longer before turning my attention back to Bo. "Sorry about that, Ciara seems to be trying to play pool again. What do you want to do know?"

"Hmm… I can think of a few things that we could do in order to try and celebrate this new… whatever this is." Bo teases, a wide grin tugging at her lips as she leans over, her breath tickling my ear as she whispers. "But how about we stay here for a little while longer, and just _talk_."

"You're such a tease!" I huff in mock anger, as she pulls away, a self-satisfied grin on her lips as she does so. "What else do you want to talk about?"

"Hmm… what else do you want to talk about." She begins before she suddenly asks me. "What's your favourite colour?"

"Really?" I ask, laughing as I tug our joined hand into my lap, running my thumb over the skin of her hand.

"What?" Bo questions laughing. "I want to know. The last time I was with someone I never ended up finding out what his favourite colour was, despite the fact that we were together for nearly six months."

I grin again before I answer. "It's red or pink depending on my mood, but usually I'm wearing blue. What about you?"

"Hmm…" Bo murmurs as she shifts bringing her knees up to rest on the couch, curling to face me. "I like a lot of colours, but if I was forced to chose then it would probably be black."

"Isn't that kind of morbid?" I ask.

"Says the doctor whose favourite colours are variations the of the colours that organs and blood happen to be."

I smile as I reply. "That may have something to do with it, although to be honest I'm not particularly fond of scarlet red-"

I'm interrupted by the sound of a large crowd entering the bar, the quiet, for a bar, noise level suddenly becomes deafeningly loud. Bo glances over her shoulder once before she closes her eyes before she glances over at me, smiling apologetically as she does so.

"Do you wanna get out of here?" She yells over the din of the rowdy crowd that just entered the bar.

"You want to end it so soon?" I ask, disappointed at the thought of parting with her so soon, I reach over to the table, picking up my watch as I gingerly slide it over my wrist, covering the mark that shows whom my soulmate is.

"No!" Bo says, almost to quickly, stumbling over herself as she tries to find answers to the question that I'm asking her. "Do you want to come back to my place?"

"What about…" I hesitate, forgetting the name of the raven-haired young woman that I met in the park, but have only had mentioned in passing since.

"Kenzi?" Bo supplies as I nod my head.

"She's over there, at the bar." Bo continues as she points at a familiar head of black hair. "She's going to get herself drunk, probably going to be here for hours. Don't worry about her getting home, Trick'll make sure she gets into a cab when it's time."

"That still doesn't mean anything…" I say before I sigh, forcing myself to smile. "I think it's better if I go home, it'll be easier if we don't tempt it tonight I think, given how hard it seems to be for us to keep our hands off of each other."

Bo, bites her lip, her eyes downcast before she closes them sighing. "I don't want you to leave."

"I know Bo..." I begin, glancing down at my watch. "That late already? I'm so sorry Bo as much as I would love to spend the night with you I can't. My shift starts very early tomorrow morning, and I need to be up even earlier."

Bo sighs again before opening her eyes. "And I have a dissertation that I need to work on, and pile of tests that I need to be marked."

Reaching out I caress run my fingers over he cheek, reveling in the feeling of her skin against mine, in the slight sparks that pass through my fingers as I trail them along slowly. "Do you want to try a Friday night maybe? We could try a movie night or something?"

Bo smiles, and I move my fingers, allowing my thumb to cross over her lips before I go back to stroking her cheek, enjoying the simple feel of her skin underneath my finger tips. "It sounds perfect Bo. How about I cook dinner to? I can make a mean pasta dish."

Bo's smile only widens, laughing as she asks me. "Should I be impressed by the fact that you can cook the staple food of any student?"

"It's not Kraft Dinner!" I mutter indignantly, which only causes Bo to laugh before she squeezes my hand again.

"Well either way that sounds like an amazing idea Dr. Lewis." Bo replies as she stands up, pulling me up with her gently as she does so.

"How does Friday night sound?" I ask her as we begin to make our way towards the exit to the Dahl, Bo stopping for a second, turning around as she shouts something to Trick over the din.

"Sorry, just saying goodbye. Sounds good to me." She replies.

"My place?"

"Yeah." Bo responds, smiling as she squeezes my hand again before she lets my hand go, my arm falling gently to my side.

"Can I walk you to your car?" I ask as she pushes the door open, holding it open for me as she walks out.

"I would like that." Bo replies as the swings door closed behind her. I shiver as the cold air hits me, tugging my thin jacket closer to my body in the vain hope that the warmth from my body heat will stop the leather from going stiff in the cold breeze. Bo glances at me, her eyes wide with concern, but just as she's about to open her mouth to ask me something but then she closes it again.

Her eyes light up as she nods to herself quietly, before she looks over at me. "I don't want tonight to end."

"I know Bo." I sigh as I reach up to cup her cheek, stroking the smooth skin I find there lightly. "But we both have things we have to do. I have work and you have school tomorrow, we can't. God knows I want to, that I want _you_ , but we shouldn't not tonight."

"Just because we shouldn't doesn't mean we can't." She whispers as she leans closer to me, her breath and mine mingling, in small white puffs of air between us. "I want to kiss you. Will you let me?"

How am I supposed to walk away from her when I want her so much? When I can barely keep my hands off of her?

I can't.

I nod my head once before replying with a single word. "Yes."

She grabs me by the waist, pulling me into the alley way near the entrance to the Dahl before she backs me into the wall, her lips finding mine in the darkness as she initiates a fierce kiss. I let out a quiet moan as her hands settle possessively on my hips, and I slide mine in between her arms and her body wrapping mine around her waist.

I know this is a bad idea. That I shouldn't be doing this, but how am I supposed to walk away?

The simple answer seems to be that I can't, that it requires more willpower then it's worth, but as always the answer is far more complex then a simple case of do I want or do I not, but as Bo nips at my lower lip, my mind empties of all thought as Bo's hands move lower, cupping my ass as she pulls me closer to her. It's not until my lungs begin to burn, the air I'm pulling in through my nose inadequate, that I even begin to consider pulling away from the kiss. But Bo makes that decision for me when she breaks our kiss, pressing her forehead against mine, our breathes mingling as we try to catch our breath.

"We're not going to last until Friday are we?" I gasp out between heavy breathes, but instead of responding Bo leans in again capturing my lips in another heated kiss. I sigh as I lean into her, moving my lips against her own as I shift my head, capturing her lower lip in between mine and sucking on it.

Bo growls when I bite her lower lip, before soothing it with my tongue, her loose grip on my hips tightening as she pulls me close, pressing her chest against mine. I shiver as I begin to imagine what it might feel like to have our naked chests press together, her nipples brushing against mine. I move my arms down from around her waist I grab at her hips, pulling her close to me as I settle one of my thighs in between hers, pressing against the seam of her jeans.

I can feel the heat radiating from her centre, the heat that _I_ have caused, and we've only been kissing for a short amount of time. Do I have as profound an effect on her as she does on me?

She lets out a gasping moan as I turn us around, pressing her against the wall behind us as I'm overcome with the urge to touch her, to feel her around my fingers, to taste her. I want all of her.

"Lauren…" Bo breathes in my ear as I pull away from our kiss, and begin to press my lips to the side of her neck, sucking on the skin lightly as I press myself closer to her, encouraging her to grind against my thigh. The warmth I feel only grows as she moves against me, small quite moans escaping from her lips as she grips at my back.

"Lauren, car now!" Bo cries out demandingly as I continue to press quick kisses to the skin of her neck, stopping occasionally to nip at it with my teeth.

"Whose…?" I begin to question her as I pull away, before one of her hands comes to rest in my hair, pressing my head back against her neck.

"Yours… mine, wherever there's a bed!" Bo cries out, tugging at my head impatiently as pulling me off of her neck, and guiding my mouth back to hers as we come together in a feverish kiss. Without even thinking I push her further into the wall, pressing myself as close as I can to her as I grind my thigh against the seam of her jeans, she breaks the kiss when she lets out another moan, the arm on hip moving up my back as she pulls me tightly against her as she begins to move against my thigh.

"Bo…" I moan out when she breaks the kiss, beginning to move down my neck, biting at the skin there before soothing it with her hot tongue. A shudder runs down my spin as I slump against her, letting the feel of being in her arms momentarily overwhelm me before she turn us around again, pressing me against the rugged, cold surface of the brick behind me as she slips one of her thighs between both of mine. A groan escapes from me at the deep contrast to the warm-wetness that has erupted between my thighs and the cold of the air that surrounds me.

Bo begins to press kisses to my neck, traveling lower as one of her hands moves from my hip to the collar of my shirt, tugging it down to give her more access to my neck. A noise escapes from one of us, I'm not entirely sure who, as I move my head to the side, showing her more of the skin of my neck, and revealing part of my collarbone to the cold air that surround us.

My head falls back, coming to rest against the brick behind us. I move my hand up to rest in Bo's hair, pressing her closer to me, encouraging her to continue as I feel her other hand moving around to the front of my blouse, slipping inside of it to rest against my stomach. The contact is electric, and sends waves of pleasure through me, but at the same time I want her higher, I want her hand on my breast.

I move my hand, to cover hers under my blouse as I feel her begin to pull it away and indeed beginning to yank it higher, or at least I try to until another cold breezes goes past us, sending a shiver down my spin as I'm pressed further against the heat sapping brick behind me.

It serves as an unfortunate reminder of where exactly we are.

I don't want our first time to be in some alleyway next to Bo's grandfather's bar, or in the back seat of my car like a pair of horny teenagers.

"Bo…" I whimper, as I move my hand down to clutch at her back, a shudder of pleasure traveling down my spin as she sucks on a particularly sensitive spot on my neck, before she pulls away her tongue laving at the area she had been working on with her lips and teeth, her other hand pulling out from under my shirt, drifting upward until it cups one of my breasts. Another gasp escapes from me as I begin to stutter out. "We have to stop."

"Unh? Wah?" Bo groans out before she begins to trail kisses back up my neck, and along my cheek until she presses another kiss against my lips, a softer and slower one, a gentle and more loving one then before.

"Sorry, sorry." She whispers as she pulls away, her eyes downcast. She pants, trying to catch her breath as she takes a step back, not breaking our embrace but putting some distance between the two of us. "You're just... completely irresistible to me."

I smile as I begin to run my hands up and down her back soothingly. "It's alright. I just don't want our first time to be against the wall in some dark alleyway."

"That I can understand." Bo says, her eyes lighting-up a little more then they had been a moment earlier. I can't help but wonder what they are shinning with, is it lust, happiness, or something else that I just can't place?

"So…?" Bo begins before she trails off, an awkward silence enveloping us. I smile at her as I move one of my hands up, brushing a piece of hair away from her face, tucking it behind her ear.

"It's okay." I repeat.

"Do you want to call it a night?" She finally asks me, her voice shaking as she asks, her grip on my waist as she does so, pulling me closer to her. Contradictory actions, that show what she knows she should do, and what she wants to do, mirrors what I'm feeling. I shake my head before leaning forward, letting it rest against her shoulder, as her arms tighten around me, holding me against her, as if she's afraid I'll disappear if she lets me go. I didn't want to leave her, but I know that at some point I'm going to have to.

"Bo." I sigh quietly, turning my head to the side as I press a kiss to the skin of her throat, closing my eyes as I inhale her scent, taking comfort in the smell before I lift my head up. I bump her nose with mine nuzzling it as I press my forehead against hers, a smile tugging at my lips as I ask her. "Do you want to come back to my place for a while?"

Bo blinks, once, twice, three times before a brilliant grin splits on her lips as she opens her mouth to speak before she closes it again.

"You sure?" She finally asks.

I smile nodding

"What about your roommates?"

"Tamsin and Ciara were playing pool when we left, well Tamsin was playing, Ciara was... doing what Ciara does when she plays pool which is to say badly. They'll be at it for hours yet." I assure Bo. "Once they get started Ciara becomes stubbornly competitive, and refuse to give up until she has gotten at least one ball in a pocket, which can take a while."

Bo's raises an eyebrow as she replies. "Ciara, competitive? No offence but that's something that I have a hard time believing."

I smile in response, remembering how Ciara was when we first met her, much closer to the woman that Bo once knew. "She wasn't before her and Tamsin started dating, but apparently that stubborn streak of hers turns into a competitive one under the right circumstances."

"Why doesn't that surprise me?" Bo mutters to herself before she leans over and presses another kiss to my lips. Sighing I wrap my arms around her, pulling her into me as the spark between us is reignited by the simple press of her lips against mine.

Slowly I pull back from Bo as I move my hand up to stroke her cheek. Her eyes are closed and her cheeks are flush, from the cold of the air around us or from the heat of arousal, I don't know but right now I don't think I've ever seen her look more beautiful. Slowly I take a few steps back from her, breaking the embrace between us. Her eyes flutter open, her pupils dilated as her hazel eyes shin with lust.

I can see her smirk as her eyes move up and down my body, and I know she's aware of the effect she has on me, of the fire that is burning between my thighs from only our heated kisses. I smirk before I reach out and grab her hand, intertwining our fingers before I pull her in the direction of my car.

"Let's get out of here." I say as she squeezes my hand a smirk on her lips.

"I don't think I've heard sexier words come out of your mouth tonight."

My stomach flips as my sex clenches at her words, at the thought of what is to come. I look over at Bo, my imagination beginning to spin, conjuring images of what is to come.

* * *

"Home-sweet-home." I say as I unlock the door to the apartment that Tamsin and I share. I push the door open before I step aside, holding it open for Bo to follow me in. I can't help but feel nervous at the thought of showing her the apartment, she wasn't meant to come over for another week. The tension between us had waned on the car ride over, filling with an awkward silence as we both stretched our minds trying to find topics to converse on as we fought against the overwhelming tension between us.

Now it seems that tension has mutated into an insurmountable awkwardness.

When was the last time that we even cleaned this place? It doesn't happen nearly frequently enough, between Ciara and I we keep it fairly clean, but Ciara wasn't over last night and I can't even remember if I folded up the bed and put the cushions back on the couch…

"You have a bed in your living room?" Bo asks, laughing.

I sigh, that question has been answered. How could I have forgotten to fold the bed back into the couch?

"Sorry for the mess."

"Do you have someone staying with you?" She asks before pausing and looking down at her feet. "Ah where can I put my shoes?"

"On the mat with the others if you don't mind." I tell her as I begin to unzip the leather boots on my feet.

"You have quite a collection here." Bo says as she looks over at the various trays lining the wall opposite the door.

"Most of those are Ciara's." I reply before I point to the lonely, slightly more tattered and broken then the rest, mat closest to the door. "That one's the one that Tamsin and I share."

"Why does that not surprise me at all?" Bo chuckles as she toes off her shoes, hesitating for a moment before she places them on the mat next to a pair of mine. I look at her once a gentle smile on my lips before I turn to look at her.

Bo is leaning against the wall, her arms crossed as she smirks, watching me with inquisitive eyes.

I bend down, placing my shoes next to Bo's, nudging an old pair of Tamsin's to the side as I do so, I sneak a glance over at Bo, whom is now grinning at me, her gaze is hooded, eyes dark with arousal. She licks her lips as her eyes trail up my body, appraising, cataloguing, scanning, and tracing as she does so. I close my eyes, shivering under the intensity of her gaze.

I bite my lip, as I remain kneeling on the ground, torn between two distinct wants and desires. I could feel the intensity of Bo's gaze on me, the heat of a thousand suns cooler then the looks of fiery desire that she is casting my way. It's tempting to give in, it would be _easy_ to give in to her, to what she wants, to what my body craves. There is also a different desire however, one that is distinctly less passionate, and the one that is quickly beginning to look more and more tempting as my body begins to let me know just how exhausted it is.

"Bo?" I sigh as I stand-up. "Would it be okay if we just watched a movie or something?"

She blinks before her eyes grow downcast, a small frown tugging at her lips as her shoulders slump, a disappointed sigh escaping from her lips. She looks back at me once before she averts her eyes away from mine.

"Sure. What do you have?" She asks, passing it off with a smirk as she takes a few, deliberate steps forward, accentuating the movements of her hips. My mouth goes dry as I try to swallow, my desire for her rearing it's head, making it's presence known as my heart begins to pound in my chest, the beat echoing in my ear, a voice whisper for me to simply give in to what I want, what she is tempting me with. I shake my head, now is not the time to even begin to think about this, about being with her. We're not even really dating for heaven's sake, and I want more then a physical relationship with her.

"Lauren? You okay?" Bo asks, turning around to look at me, the smirk on her face gone, replaced by a concerned frown tugging at her lips, her eyebrows drawn tightly together. She begins to walk back towards me, stopping just before me she reaches out, cupping my cheek.

"Hey, what's going through that big brain of yours huh?" Bo prods gently, trying to get me to talk, but I can't meet her eyes, so instead I stare at the well-worn hardwood floor we're standing on. I can't help but grimace, this room holds so many memories for me, both good and bad.

"Hey…" Bo says, her voice gentle, as she speaks, her thumb brushing across my cheek gently, sending more small sparks through the point of contact between her and I. "What's going on?"

"I just don't want to rush this." I murmur in reply. "I don't want this to become something that's only physical."

"Are you worried about how this is going to turn out? Do you think I only want you for your body?" She asks in shocked disbelief, her voice full of hurt as she pulls away from me, taking a few steps back.

"Bo..." I say, reaching out, trying to stop her from taking any more steps back. "It's not that I don't want this, whatever _this_ is, because I do, I very much do. But don't you think we might be moving a little to fast?"

Bo sighs before she turns to face the faux-wood bookshelf that holds our movies and TV shows, her eyes scanning up and down the titles, trying to distract herself as she avoids talking to me.

"Bo." I try again as she turns to glance at me briefly, her eyes hard, her shoulders tense as she looks as me before turning back to the titles in front of her. I bite my lip as I continue to stare at her. I have no idea what triggered the sudden change in her mood, in the atmosphere of our interactions, they have gone from playful and flirtatious to tense and awkward in a matter of moments. Needing a distraction I walk over to the pull out couch, walking around it slowly until I come to rest in front of the bottom. I sigh as I try to lift it up so that I can fold the bed away, I can at least make the room look a little cleaner, more like a living room, but when I try to move the bed it resists, moving up on the hinges built into the couch instead of folding in on itself like it normally would.

"Oh you've got to be kidding me." I mutter as I try again, pushing with more force then before. This time the bed lets out a creaking, shuddering groan at the additional force being applied to the old frame, but it still refuses to collapse in on itself, instead the back hinges take the weight, sending the bed straight up into the air.

I turn to look at Bo, smiling apologetically as I lower the bed to the ground. "Sorry... It's old, rusting in more then a few places, the hinges don't always work like they should anymore."

I can see the beginnings of a smile tugging at Bo's lips a she looks on at me as I try to move the bed again, the rusting hinges creaking in protest as they give slightly, only for the resistance force to exert its seemingly insurmountable will moments later as the bed collapses back down in front of me again, barely missing my sock clad feet, the carpet the only thing muffling the thump of the bed frame as it crashes down to the ground. I let out an annoyed grumble before I walk over to the side of the bed, trying to find out which of the hinges are acting up this time.

I look over at Bo again, only to see the smile that has been tugging at her lips finally break through. "What?"

"You know you could leave the bed out..." Bo suggests, her voice low and husky, speaking of an arousal far beyond what she is willing to voice.

I smile, repressing a shudder from the tone of her voice, as I shake my head before telling her. "Trust me, when I say that the couch is more comfortable then the bed."

"I'm guessing you would know wouldn't you?" Bo laughs as she turns back to the shelves in front of her.

"Why would you say that?" I tease.

"Because I can imagine you stumbling in here half-asleep, and just collapsing onto the first flat surface that you can find." She laughs back. "You're not the first resident that I've met."

"Really? Do any of the other ones that you've met happen to go by J.D., Elliot, and Turk or Meredith, Alex, Cristina... Need I continue?" I ask, raising my eyebrow.

"Ah... There might have be a Meredith, and an Alex, Izzy, and Cristina" She admits sheepishly. "When Kenzi found out what you were she made me watch it alright."

"You knows those shows are about as unrealistic as it gets right?" I ask her, to which she nods in reply.

"I know, but she thought it would be a good idea to prepare me for the inevitable."

"Huh? Bo I work at a hospital in the middle of a small town, most of the time the most interesting thing I see is a broken bone." I reply, before hesitating. "Are you sure that you're going to be okay with this? Because this isn't going to be easy."

Bo smiles as she walks over to me. I push myself up into a standing position as she comes to a halt in front of me. She smiles at me as she moves, hesitating for a moment before she opens her mouth to speak. "I want to give us a shot, to see where this goes, what we can become."

Without thinking, without worrying about what tomorrow could bring I press both of my hands to her cheeks, and ram our mouths together in a heated kiss. Bo wraps her arms around me in response, pulling me to her as we kiss each other, I try to pour put the passion that I can't verbalize, the feelings that I can't even begin to express for her, I try to communicate it all to her through the press of my lips against hers.

I gasp when she breaks the kiss, but doesn't pull away, her forehead presses against mine, and our noses brush as we pant, trying to catch our breath. Her eyes shin as she speaks, her mouth shifting until it is pressed against my ear. "No more talking about this okay? Let's just see where this goes, no worrying about the future, let's just focus on us, on the present."

I nod as I lean in pressing a quick kiss to her lips before she smirks, taking a few steps back from me, a mischievous smirk on her lips.

"If you get to tease me about watching Grey's Anatomy then maybe you should tell me who all of this Star Trek stuff belongs to hmm?" Bo teases, a smug grin on her lips as she gestures to the shelf on the bookcase that is filled with Star Trek DVDs.

"It's mine." I reply, smiling with the pride that fills me every time I see my collection.

"So that means that my soulmate is a giant Trekkie?" Bo teases as she reaches out to grab on of the box-sets off of the shelf. "And their limited editions too."

I let out a good-natured groan, as I look over at her, a teasing, all-knowing smirk has settle on her lips as she dangles the box in front of me. "You really are a bit of a geek aren't you?"

"So what if I am?" I reply, a smirk on my lips.

"You know…" Bo begins before she trails off, putting the DVD back on the shelf. "It's actually kind of hot."

I can't help the smile that breaks out onto my lips as I look over at her, a small warmth blossoming in the pit of my stomach as my heartbeat picks-up from the light ring of her laughter as it echoes through the room. There is a look of absolute joy on her face as she continues to peruse Tamsin and mine's combined collection of TV and movies. Her fingers occasionally reaching out to pull one of them off the shelf before she hesitates and stops herself.

"Is there anything in particular that you want to watch?" Bo asks as she continues to absently scan the shelves.

"No, whatever you want to watch is alright." I reply as I walk back over to the pullout, and begin to fiddle with the frame again.

"You have _The Notebook?_ " Bo asks finally, breaking the silence as she pulls the old movie off of the shelf, and holds it up in front of me, a small smirk on her face. "For some reason neither you nor Tamsin, from little you've told me about her, seem like the type to watch this."

"You're right about that. Guess who it does belong to?"

"A certain British woman we both happen to know?"

"Yep."

Bo laughs before she looks down at the case in her hand and then back up at me. "Would it be alright if we watched this one?"

I smile as I walk over to her, pressing a quick peck to her cheek as I reach out and grab the case from her hand. "Go get comfortable on the bed, I'll join you in a minute okay?"

Bo smiles at me, before she leans over and captures my lips in a brief kiss, a promise of what's to come I'm sure, before she husks in my ear "I'll be waiting for you in bed."

I take a shuddering breath as I try to calm myself down, her words echoing in my mind, over and over, rolling themselves around in my mind as they refuse to leave. I look over at Bo once as she settles herself down on the bed, a come hither look in her eyes as she does so. I bite my lip to suppress the groan that tries to escape from me, and despite my exhaustion arousal washes through me anew.

* * *

I startle awake, as the bang of a door slamming back into the frame echoes through the apartment, earth-shattering when compared to the relative quiet that had surrounded us before. I can hear the sounds of quiet talking as the thump of shoes falling to the floor rings through the apartment, quieter then the door, but still far to loud for what I'm sure is an early hour.

Letting out a groan I try to roll over and go back to sleep, but the arm around my arm wrapped tightly around my torso, holding me against a strong body, prevents me from doing so. My eyes shot open as I try to remember what had happened the night before, who is behind me.

A groan escapes from the person behind me, low-pitch and annoyed before the arm around my waist tightens and pulls me back towards the person, woman it's a woman, behind me. She shifts behind me, pulling me back against her as she does so, the springs squeaking out there protest at the suddenly addition to the weight load they have to bear. I can feel the rough material from the jeans of the woman behind me, rubbing against my lower leg as I try once again to shift away from her.

What happened?

A soft groan escapes from my lips as I move again, causing the leg flung over my own to shift, and its owner to let out an annoyed grumble. The last thing I remember is putting the DVD in the player, and curling up on the couch as the opening credits played. Had I fallen asleep? I must've, but that still doesn't explain how Bo and I ended up spooning on the pull-out couch. She must have fallen asleep at some pint during the movie because if I strain my hearing I can hear the faint echoes of the title screen's music over the din caused by Tamsin and Ciara.

"Did you forget to fold the bed up again darling?" A familiar voice asks, her accent heavier the normal. I can't only assume that Ciara must be drunk or tired, those are the only times that her accent becomes so thick.

"Laur was still asleep on it when I left." She lies to Ciara.

"You picked me up at five in the afternoon darling." Ciara fires back, "I've never seen her sleep that late."

I groan as I roll over, Bo's arm having loosed its grip on me enough to let me turn onto my stomach and bury my face in the hard mattress below me, the pillowcase's scratchy fabric an unwelcome feeling against the skin of my face.

What were they doing home tonight? They almost never come home if they've been out drinking or hanging out at a bar they usually go to whomever's place is closer, and I'm fairly sure that hers is closer then ours is.

The muffled sounds of there steps echo through the apartment as they step into the apartment proper, the sounds getting closer and closer with each reverberation off the wall. I close my eyes as I roll over nestling into Bo's warmth, not wanting to move from her arms. Bo lets out a small groan before the grip on her waist tightens and pulls her closer.

I sigh as I close my eyes, content to rest my head against her chest, my head shifting to fit underneath her chin, the flat pillow underneath my head exchanged for another.

"Ciara get behind me." Tamsin whispers harshly.

"Wha..." Ciara begins before she stops. "Darling you're being paranoid again."

"No, there's someone in the bed!" Tamsin barks before I hear a rustle of clothing, as she begins to curse.

"Really Tamsin? You're trying to pull out your gun?" Ciara sighs as I hear her footfalls come closer, the sounds becoming more and more muffled as she reaches the carpeting that surrounds us. A gently hand comes to rest on my back, as a hand trails soothingly down my back over the sheets, shifting it slightly to expose some of there skin of my neck to the cold air of the room that surrounds us, before she moves on her hand trailing down my back with a feather light touch. She stops when she reaches the hand that Bo has wrapped around my waist as she shifts, leaning more of her weight onto the hand resting on my back, as the other comes to rest next to my head on the bed.

"It's just Lauren, darling." Ciara sighs as I shift again, curling a little closer to Bo.

"How badly did her date go if she put on _The Notebook_ of all things?" Tamsin sighs before the melodic background music cuts off abruptly with the barely audible click of the power button on the TV. _  
_

"It must have... wait there's a second person with... Bo Dennis?" Ciara exclaims surprised, before she shifts herself again. "You failed to mention that her soulmate was Bo _Dennis_ darling."

"How on Earth do you know the woman?" Tamsin mutters, her voice sharp with jealousy.

Ciara chuckles as she shifts away, the springs shrieking in indignation at the sudden change in the weight distribution on the mattress.

"We have a mutual ex."

"My bastard of a partner?" Tamsin growls.

"Yes sweetie, your bastard of a partner is our mutual ex." Ciara replies, her tone soothing as she sighs almost silently, before she leans over, slipping the cover back up over my shoulder, patting it lightly as she does so. "Rest well darling."

"Ciara?"

"Yes love?"

"Why did you pull the cover back up over her shoulder?"

"Is that really pertinent love?"

"Yes."

"Because she shivered when I pulled it away darling." Ciara replies flatly.

"What is she doing out here on the couch?" Tamsin growls out, as she beings to storm over towards the couch, the rhythm of her footsteps an angry drumbeat in the otherwise silent room.

"Love think before you do something stupid please." Ciara begs as I hear footsteps moving away, the muffled thuds and the almost tranquil pace telling me that it has to be Ciara, not my irate best-friend. I can hear a sigh followed by the rustling of clothing, and a small, content moan escape from one of them.

"How is it that you always know what to say?" Tamsin finally says, her voice soft, as she speaks in a tone that I rarely hear her use. It's one filled with love, with affection. It's the one that softens her voice to the point of a whisper. It was how I knew she had fallen I love with Ciara all that time ago, shortly after they had started dating. She had used that tone when she spoke about her.

I can't help the smile that tugs on my lips as I close my eyes and lean my forehead against Bo's chest, content for the first time to stop listening to their conversation, to stop collecting knowledge and facts, and to simply stand still. I can feel my eyes grow heavy as my breathing begins to fall into sync with Bo's, a small sigh of contentment escapes from me as I allow my body to relax, sink into Bo's warmth, to enjoy the feeling of being in her arms for the first time, but hopefully not the last.

A nonsense murmur escapes from Bo as she shifts again in her sleep, stretching out as she pulls me closer go her. A small, content smile tugs at my lips as my eyes drift closed, my body relaxed from the warmth of my soulmate.

I can't help the smile on my lips as I press myself a little closer to her.

I almost wish that I could fall asleep like this every night, in her embrace, with her body pressed against mine.

With this feeling of rightness that consumes me when I'm with her, the one that soothes the hollow ache I feel when we're separated.

The warmth that consumes me, in my body and in my soul, the feelings that are beginning to consume my heart.


	8. Chapter 8

The shrill beeping of the alarm is the first thing to penetrate the darkness that surrounds me, the vibrations of my phone against my thigh follow forth soon after. I let out a gasp as I startle awake, my hand reaching up to grope around on my nightstand, only to feel the rough fabric of an oblong object come in contract with my hand instead.

"Whaa?" I groan as I blink open my eyes, before closing them again not wanting to leave the warm confines of sleep but still the beeping continues on, forcing me to open my eyes again. I let another groan escaping from my mouth when I see that the darkness that I was lost in was not only internal, but external as well. I hear another groan escape from nearby as I become aware of another source of heat, one that isn't from the blankets, but from another body pressed next to mine. I startle from my half sleep as the person next to me as pulls me closer to the chest my head rests against. I blink again as my body burrows into the body next to mine, a content warmth settling into the pit of my stomach, my eyes falling shut as I savour the warmth of the person lying next to me, of the feeling of being in her arms.

"Kenz turn off your alarm would you? I can hear it from down here." The low, husky sleep-filled voice of my companion grumbles out as the warm pressure of the arm wrapped around my waist tugs me closer to her body, the warmth that fills the pit of my stomach only blossoming further. I let out another annoyed grumble, trying my best to ignore my alarm until I absolutely have to get up.

I don't want to leave Bo's arms, not yet anyways. She let's out another groan as I feel her shift again, the hand on my waist letting go as she shifts herself into a more upright position, causing my head to fall onto the mattress below me. Another groan escapes from the loss of warmth from her body as I roll onto my stomach, trying to block out the noise of the alarm that's going off far to early in the morning. I hear a soft aha as my alarm falls silent, the mattress creaking again as Bo shifts next to me, lying back down as her arm comes to rest lightly over my waist, as Bo shifts again pressing her body as close to mine as she can. I let out a content sigh as I shift to face her, sliding my hand underneath her pillow.

Bo let's out something that sounds suspiciously like a content purr as she curls up against me, her warm breath tickling the hairs at the top of my head as she settles back in. I allow another nonsense murmur to escape as I allow myself to begin to drift off to sleep warm and content in Bo's arms. I sigh when I feel her hand settle against the small amount of skin exposed at my waist from where my shirt has risen up during the night, a small shiver of pleasure at the contact traveling up my spine.

"Go back to sleep Lo, I think you forgot to turn off you're alarm." She murmurs into my hair, pressing a kiss to the crown of my head as she presses herself a little closer to me. I'm beginning to fall asleep, the silence only broken by the sound of Bo's and my breathing, our chests rising and falling in sync as we begin to fall asleep again when a loud bang that rings out through the apartment moments later startles me awaken once more.

"Scrubs you had better… oh _you're_ awake." Tamsin growls, her voice still heavy with sleep even as she does so.

"Who…?" Bo murmurs, her body shifting again as the arm wrapped around my waist trails slowly up my back, the warmth of her body disappearing as she shifts away from me. I already miss her warmth, even though she's still right next to me and her hand is still resting against my back. "You're Tamsin right?"

"So you're Bo Dennis then?" Tamsin asks, her voice suddenly cold. It's a tone that I haven't heard in years, not since we first met back in university, we could barely stand each other back then.

"Who's asking?" I reach out trying to grab the hand that Bo has resting on the bed next to my head, squeezing it as I try to somehow warn her that she shouldn't get defensive with Tamsin.

"Why are you so defensive about your identity? Something to hide?" Tamsin asks cryptically, her voice cold. I sigh as I blink open my eyes, the only way this situation is ever going to get diffused is if I'm the one to do it. Tamsin has never done well with strangers, especially if she talks to them without Ciara or I there to diffuse things when she gets like this.

"Tamsin stop interrogating Bo, please." I request as I role over to face her, not bother to open my eyes.

"Oh… so you are awake after all."

"Yes of course I am. What did you expect?"

I sigh before a yawn escapes from my lips. Slowly I blink my eyes open, as I shift myself onto my back, my head coming to rest fully on one of the old scratchy pillows, but Tamsin hasn't turned a light on, and it's too dark to see even her outline. I try to sit up on my elbows, to get a better view of the living room, instead of the one that is blocked by the arm of the couch, but Bo grabs me instead.

"It's still early. Sleep..." Bo murmurs as she moves back down, pulling me to her as she shifts, pressing herself as close to me as she can. A shiver travels down my spine at the feeling of small patches of skin against mine from where our shirts rode up during the night. I shake my head as I lean up, pressing a kiss to Bo's collarbone before I roll over and pull myself away.

"As much as I would love to stay in bed with you Bo, I can't. Do you remember when I told you that my shift started insanely early?" I ask as I gently pry myself away from her incredibly tight grip, propping myself up on my elbow as I do so. I don't want to leave, I don't want to leave her arms and return to the

"Mhmm?" She responds, her arm tightening it's grip on my waist. I smile as I lean down to press a kiss to her forehead before I speak again.

"Well this is insanely early." I murmur into her hair, a fond smile tugging at my lips as I use the hand of the arm that is propping me up to stroke her hand. Bo let's out a content murmur as she nuzzles her head against my stomach instead. My nose twitches as I bite my lip, trying to hold back a giggle at the sensation of her nose bumping against my abdomen.

"Don't want to let you go." She grumbles, her arm tightening more around my waist.

I bring my free hand up, stroking through her hair gently for a few moments, simply enjoying the feeling of softness of it in my palm.

"You have to Bo, I have to go to work." I sigh, blinking back the heaviness of exhaustion behind my eyes. I yawn again, as I stretch, shifting gently in an attempt to get Bo to loosen her grip on me and let me get out of bed.

Another annoyed grumble escapes from her as she grabs at me, trying to hold me in place and prevent me from escaping from her grip.

"Bo… I really do have to get up. I'm so sorry, but you and I both know that this was sort of an accident."

"Don't wanna be away from you."

"I don't want to be away from you either." I murmur as she moves her head until I know she's looking up at me, although because of the darkness in the room I can't see her eyes. "But I have to go to work. And you have class in a few hour

I smile down

"My Lauren." She murmurs hugging me around the waist as she buries her face in my stomach. I laugh lightly as I stroke her hair, my fingers moving up and down in a soothing rhythm. It doesn't take long before Bo seems to drift off again, her grip on my waist coming loose as she falls asleep again. I bring my hand up to the one still loosely griping my waist, catching it gently in my own. I bring it up to my lips, pressing a kiss to the soft skin there before I move away from Bo, and slowly begin to slide out from underneath he arm, her hand still firmly clasped in my own. An annoyed grumble escapes from her lips as I try to move away from her as I try to slide out of bed with as much stealth as I can manage. I stay still for a minute, waiting to make sure that I don't wake her up. Although if I'm completely honest with myself I'm also relishing in the last moments I get to spend in her arms because I'm not going to see her again for almost a week.

A week to long it feels like. I already want to be with her every second of everyday, but even that doesn't feel like it would be enough. I look down at her as I press another kiss to the side of her forehead.

"Sleep well." I whisper in her ear as I pull away, smiling as I look down at Bo, her grip on my hand going completely slack as she finally drifts off into oblivion.

Bo lets out a cute snoozing sound but she doesn't complain otherwise as I finally pull away from her. I can see the outline of her arm curling around the spare pillow instead, the springs squeaking as she pulls it to her chest. I laugh silently, shaking my head at the thought of the site before me as I stand up completely and begin to make my way over towards the kitchen, my next objective clear.

The great and powerful drug known as caffeine and the not so delicious coffee that it comes in.

"Scrubs?" Tamsin whispers as I approach the kitchen, the dim light from the kettle the only light in the otherwise dark kitchen.

"It's me." I reply before frowning. "Did my alarm wake you up?"

"Nah." She replies dismissively before she reaches out and grabs something off of the counter. "This woke me up."

"What are you holding in front of me?" I ask, squinting as I try to make out the outline of whatever she's holding in front of me, but unfortunately it blends in with her outline. Tamsin sighs I see what I assume is her thumb moves as she presses something on the face of the object she's holding in front of my face, and light immediately springs forth from the device, the familiar home screen of her phone appearing in front of me as she does so, showing me a pair of texts from someone called Bastard Partner.

"Who…?"

"My Bastard partner." Tamsin replies, refusing to provide the poor person with a given name, which means that it can really only be one person. She actually liked Hale enough to give him a name on her phone.

"Dyson?" I ask her.

"If you want to the undeserving dick a name."

"Is he still going on about Ciara?"

"The bastard doesn't even remember her name! At least he could bother to remember what he did to her!" She shouts I glare at her as I make a shushing sound before glancing back out into the living room to see if Tamsin's outburst had awoken Bo, but the outline on the couch remains as still as the dead. I can't help the smile that appears on my lips as I look at her, along with the burning desire to walk back over to that bed and crawl into it and pull Bo into my arms. I shake my head, as wonderful as the idea sounds if I need to go to work. Tamsin clears her through as she tries to get my attention, I shake my head as I reorient myself, before I turn back to Tamsin and begin to berate her.

"Your partner and my soulmate are still asleep, can we please keep it that way?" I hiss, before my eyes narrow and I glance over at the door. "Or do you feel like dealing with Ciara's wrath? You know how she is when she's woken up this early in the morning."

"I can…" Tamsin begins before she promptly stops talking, the kettle conveniently beginning to whistle, interrupting her and stopping her from finishing her sentance. "Oh look at that the water's ready!"

"Do you have to make a sacrifice to the Ciara monster?"

"Ah… maybe. She's going to kill me when she wakes up."

"Do you think that it's pathetic that we're 29 and still living off of instant coffee?" I ask as begin to search the counter space for the tin of coffee.

"I just barely made detective and if you want to argue about it you're still technically a student."

"That is a quickly diminishing technicality."

"Fine then you're a resident. Most people don't expect functional residents let alone sane ones. Well they expect sane ones, but I don't think many people expect you to be a functional human being." She mutters, about to continue when her phone begins to vibrate on the counter.

"What!" She barks into it as she brings it up to her ear, the light from the screen casting an eerie glow on her face, highlighting her cheekbones and creating deep shadows around her eyes. For a moment I swear I see her eyes disappear, becoming little more then dark recesses in her skull, but when I blink and shake my head the light of the phone has dimmed, leaving only her green-blue eyes sparkling as they always have.

I blink again, yawning as I do so. So tired...

"Gah! I'll be in as soon as I can get some damned coffee- no you do not get some. Get your own." Tamsin growls into the phone before she pulls it away from her ear and presses the red button on the screen, ending the call despite the small, low, but still audible voice protesting.

"Bastard." She growls as she shoves the phone back into the carrier on her hip.

"You really don't like him." I mutter in reply.

"Astute observation doctor. Do they pay you that salary of yours for those skills?" She growls, as I role my eyes silently. There's no point in trying to reason with her before she's had her coffee, or really any time before ten.

"You're grumpy in the morning."

"Another astute observation. I really hate being woken up in the middle of the night for no goddamn reason you know?"

"Not really because in case you've forgotten I work the nightshift two weeks a month."

"Yeah, yeah, but you signed up for that, and you knew it would continue on for five years at the very least. I thought I would be done with this whole let's call them in at three thing!" Tamsin growls. "But he's caught a whiff of some clue or another that I _absolutely_ need to come in and see."

"Technically it's four." I reply, but all Tamsin does is growl at me in response. I quickly decide that finding the coffee tin is my current imperative, unless I have a burning desire to listen to Tamsin complain the entire drive into work because odds are she's not in a fit state to drive.

Groping around in the darkness I finally manage to find the tin of coffee, what is it even doing in the corner on the other side of the counter I don't know, and quickly walking over to the nearest cabinet I open it. I grope around the lowest shelf until my fingers brush against the cool ceramic of one of the mugs, moving my hand a little further to the right my fingers come in contact with the curved handle. Quickly pulling it down I open the tin and take the spoon that lives inside of it and scooping out two generous spoonfuls, dumping them into the cup before I stop and decide to add another one.

I walk over to the kettle and grab it off of its base and quickly pour the hot liquid into the mug. Grabbing the spoon again I begin to stir the liquid as I slowly make my way back over towards Tamsin.

"Drink." I order Tamsin as I let go of the spoon, and shove it in her direction. The kinetic energy that I've put into the system stirring the coffee causing the spoon to continue to spin around in the cup for a few more rounds, the spoon clinking against the inside of the cup as it continues to hit the edges at random points.

"Thanks." Tamsin murmured, her fingers briefly brushing mine as she lifts the cup out of my hand. "Do you need the spoon?"

"Nope." I reply as I slide past her as I begin to make my way over to my bedroom in order to change into my scrubs.

"Oh… what do you wanna do about our guests?"

"You're seriously calling Ciara a guest? Tamsin, she's here more often then I am."

"Should I be saying the same thing about your girlfriend lying on that couch of ours?" Tamsin hisses in my ear as she walks towards me, brushing past me and allowing our bodies to press together without even a second thought.

"Just let her sleep please. She'll be out of here by the time you get back, it's too early to kick her out. Bo and Ciara know each other anyways so it shouldn't be awkward." I murmur as I press myself against her as I move past I look down and for the first time notice the pyjamas that she's wearing. It would seem that the dancing ice-cream cones are back yet again. "You need to find a way to separate your wardrobe from Ciara's because you're wearing the dancing ice-cream cone pants again."

Tamsin glares at me before she looks down at her pants and lets out a groan. I slip past her, but not before I catch sight of Tamsin's open bedroom door. I bite my lip to stop myself from laughing when I catch sight of another outline. It would appear that Ciara has awakened, I give Tamsin a sympathetic look as I begin to make my way towards my bedroom, laughing silently as I leave Tamsin to deal with Ciara alone.

"Darling are there some things that we need to talk about once again?" Ciara growls before I shut the door to my bedroom, laughing silently as I begin to get ready for the day.

* * *

I hesitate for a moment as I zip up the hoodie to protect me from the chill of the morning. I stop, struggle with the zipper for a moment, before I sigh again, rubbing my eyes as I yawn.

What am I going to do about Bo? I can't exactly kick her out right now, I yawn as I glance over at the clock again.

It's really only 4:00? I definitely can't just kick her out, but at the same time I can't really leave without saying goodbye either, what are the odds of her even remembering our conversation at three in the morning? I shrug to myself, I don't know, I don't know if when Bo wakes up during the night she remembers things that happen or if she's like Tamsin, and you can have an entire coherent conversation with her on the meaning of life in the middle of the night and she won't remember a word of it in the morning.

I sigh as I walk over to my backpack and pick it up off the floor and quietly sling it over my shoulder. The familiar weight is for once a welcome sensation. I glance around my room again as I try to find something when my eyes fall onto my desk drawer. I close my eyes as I remember the contents of that particular drawer.

Notepaper.

I sigh as I reopen them, and let myself make my way over to the desk. I quickly open the drawer, the metal of the handle cold against the skin of my palm. Gently, quietly, because the walls in this apartment are thin and the drawer squeaks I pull it open, my eyes closing again when I catch sight of the design at the top of the paper.

It was the same on that I had used when I was with Katherine.

I close my eyes taking a breathe as I pull it out and place it gently down on the desk in front of me, and simply stare at it for a few moments as my fingers slowly drift upward towards the familiar design at the top of the page. I allow my fingers to trace out the pattern of familiar vines, their delicate loops and curves, the small branches that move off towards the ends of the page. My eyes drift closed again as I continue to trace the pattern from memory, the distinct loops and curves familiar under my fingers, the ones that seem so familiar to me now, just as an overwhelming sense of deja-vu overtakes me.

I blink my eyes open as I slowly pull my fingers away from the pattern at the top of the paper and turning my wrist over. I can't help the rueful smile that tugs at my lips as I look down at the pattern on my wrist and its similiar echo on the paper in front of me. The laugh silently at the irony of it all, at the fact that I had bought this pad of paper at random in a random store years ago in a rush because I'd had to get to work in time. I'd had a nagging feeling at the back of my mind at time as I'd starred at those notepads.

It would seem that through the simple facts of life, or through an act of fate, that this notepad would see use once again after eighteen months of simply laying there in my desk forgotten.

I reach out and grab one of the pens out of the holder and slowly begin to write the note.

_Bo,_

_Thank-you so much for last night, I had an amazing time. I'm sorry that I have to leave you like this, but I have a shift in the ER._

_There's some dry food in the cabinet and there might be some fruit or eggs and other beverages in the fridge in the fridge (make sure you check the date), and depending on when you get up Ciara might also be there (she'd be happy to cook for you)._

_I'm looking forward to seeing you on Friday, and until then I'll be counting the seconds until we can see each other again._

_Yours,_

_Lauren_

I wince as I reread the note, the formality of it feels out of place, but at the same time I can't write the note as _I_ want to because it wouldn't feel right, and it would be far too soon for the thoughts bouncing around in my head to be written down onto paper. There are so many things that I want to write in this note, to find a way to tell her those words even when I can't find it within me to say them aloud yet because it's far too soon.

I grab the note off of my desk, quickly walking over to my door and opening it. I pause as I glance around one last time making sure that I haven't forgotten anything. I close the door behind me before I begin to make my way over to the couch. Quietly I put the note next to her on the pull-out couch, my hand trailing down the soft skin her cheek, my touch as gentle as I can make it, before I lean down to press a soft kiss to Bo's cheek.

"Sleep well." I whisper in her ear, her breath tickling my cheek as I press another kiss to the side of her head before I pull away from her. It's just enough for me to catch sight of the profile of her face in the dim light of pre-dawn.

Shit!

Pre-dawn I have to get out of here.

"See you soon." I murmur into her hair as I lean down and press one last kiss to her check, closing my eyes as I take in the feeling of being so close to her, of being able to smell the faint traces of her perfume as they cling to her. I bring one of my arms up, wrapping it around her waist as I pull her into a brief and one-sided hug.

The press of her body against my own, even through clothing and from as awkward an angle as this is, it's an intoxicating one.

It's a moment that I never want to leave, but it's one that I have to.

"Goodbye my love." I whisper as I pull away from her, and just as I'm turning around to walk away I could swear that I see a smile beginning to blossom on her lips.

* * *

"Tamsin…" I groan when I pull open the door to the fridge, the clear plastic of the empty shelves the only thing staring back at me, the cheerful white trim of the front of the shelving is glinting cheerfully, almost teasingly, from the inside light of the fridge. I sigh, blinking when through the middle shelf I catch sight of a hint of green on the shelf below, my hopes rise up for a moment only to be dashed again when I kneel down and I come face-to-face with the thing we vowed never to touch again. The thing that we're _fairly_ sure is lettuce at the back of the fridge, but we don't touch it, because it's been in there since Tamsin and I moved in, _nine years ago_ and it hasn't changed. Even when we bought a new fridge it magically appeared in it. It has never rotted, never gone limp, never changed colour, and the one time Ciara tried to touch it we heard what we think was an ear-piercing, heart-attack inducing scream emanating from it.

We leave it alone now to sit in the darkest and most desolate corner of the fridge on the lowest shelf, were it can plot it's evil schemes without us bothering it.

I yawn, again, my eyes drooping as I try to fight back exhaustion. I stretch as I stand-up my scrub top moving with me in an unpleasant reminder that I have yet to change out of my work clothes.

"Forgot to undress?" I murmur as I look down, grabbing at the smooth fabric of the top and pulling it out enough for me to see that I was indeed wearing pleasant and supposedly soothing blue of my scrubs, although if I am completely honest I think it's more to differentiate us then anything else. I blink as I bring a hand up to rub at my eyes.

It would seem that I'll have to go grocery shopping, at least to get the vegetables I want for the pasta sauce I was going to try and make for dinner tonight. I yawn again as my eyelids grow heavy, and I begin to tilt to the side as my body gives out. I'm exhausted, and at this point probably far too tired to drive, or cook, or really do anything useful.

I yawn again as I stumble, trying to take a step towards the cupboard where we store the dry pasta, but before I can take more then a few steps in the direction of the dark wooden cupboard my body sways violently, more of a rocking ship in rough seas then a graceful upright human.

"Sleep… " I groan out, voicing the complaints that my body is trying to make known. I glance over at the cable box in the living room. The green light blinks back at me telling me that it's only 1:30 in the afternoon, I have time to take a nap and still make it to the grocery store in time. It would be tight, but as long as my rest lasted for no more then an hour I would be able to make it to and back in time to put the chicken on to cook and then begin preparations for the vegetables and sauce.

I glance over at the couch on more time and then back down at my scrubs.

I could change later, right now I needed to sleep.

* * *

I startle awake when I feel something beginning to vibrate against my hip. I quickly open my eyes as I shift myself into a sitting position; I shake off any remaining exhaustion as I fumble for the device clipped to my hip. Hoping against all hope I reach down my hands quickly wrap around the plastic device as I pull it up towards my face, the antiquated display simply reading 911 in red numbers.

A groan escapes from my throat before I bury my head in my hands.

"Shit!" I curse.

Now of all times?

I shake my head, there's no time. I knew I would be on home-call today… but it's uncommon to be called in.

Something must have happened if they're calling me in today.

I can feel a wave of disappointment wash over me as I realize what this most likely means.

I'll have to call Bo, I glance over at the clock again. It was only two; I had only gotten a half hour of sleep in the past twenty-four hours. And on top of that I can't call her, not right now, she's either in class or TA one of the and I can't disturb her I shake my head and quickly pull myself away from everything else as I scramble to my bedroom, quickly grabbing my backpack off the ground as I run out of the apartment.

I stop only long enough to close the door to the apartment and lock it behind me. I don't even stop to glance as I rush past a blurry yellow figure, quickly heading for the elevator before I think better of it and instead head towards the stairs, all the while cursing in my head.

Why did it have to be today of all days that this happened?

I glance down at my wrist out of habit only to stop and curse myself for my own stupidity: I had forgotten my watch. I contemplate going back to get it before I shake my head and begin to run down the stairs, the sound of my footsteps echoing through the building as I practically run down flight after flight of stairs.

And not for the first time do I curse Tamsin for her insistence that we move in to an apartment on the eight floor of our building, I had told her that the sixth would be more then adequate for our safety needs, but she had insisted on two floors higher.

The pager on my hip vibrates again, and I already know what it says and without even looking down I know that all I can do is run faster.

* * *

"Hey Bo… I guess I must've caught you while you were still in class huh?" I murmur into my phone as I slam the door to the car. The ambulance bay around me a hive of activity as more pull up and a few others depart. "Sorry about the noise, something's happened… I think some kind of accident."

"Ahh… there's a reason I'm calling and unfortunately it's not because I want to hear your voice, and I'm so sorry that you have to hear this over voice-mail instead of from me directly… well I guess this is from me, just not directly." I ramble nervously into the phone. "I have to cancel dinner tonight. I know this is last minute but I just got called in. I am so sorry… did I even remember to tell you that my job sometimes requires me to be on call? It's not often, but it does happen, especially on days when we're short staff. I don't even know if I did… ah shit…. Sorry, ambulance."

I look up again, quickly stepping to the side as a pair of paramedics rush another person through and into the ER. I look over as I hear a car come screeching into the ambulance bay, a man getting out of the driver's side and rushing around to the passenger's side. The man pauses for a minute as he stands stalk still, before I watch him sway.

I quickly rush over, trying to stop him from fainting, but he falls over before I can even reach him.

"YOU IDIOT!" I hear a woman screech, her voice loud and shrill, and the sound is quickly followed by a loud painful scream.

"I have to go Bo. I think something that you only ever really see in the movies is about to happen." I quickly bring the phone away from my ear, pressing the red button before I rush over to try and help the woman screaming in pain and the person I can only assume is her fainted partner.

"Can you tell me what's going on?" I ask as I walk over to the open passenger-side door.

"What do you think is going on you idiot!" She yells at me, gesturing to her obviously very pregnant belly, and to the wet puddle that is in between her legs.

The woman flinches again before she screams again in pain, and all I can do is wince sympathetically and look down at the twitching husband on the ground.

This is going to be a very long shift isn't it? I think before I tell the woman that I'll be right back as I run into the ED and begin to yell for two gurneys.

* * *

"Uhnn…" I groan as I slowly make my way towards the door leading to the entrance of the apartment building. A quiet groan escapes from my lips as I try to lift my foot, but it catches on the concrete platform instead. I am nearly sent tumbling to the cold, hard, and incredibly dirty ground below me, but I manage to catch myself in time. I shiver, shaking again as my cold rain soaked jacket rubs against the exposed skin of my arms.

"Mhn…" I groan as I right myself, my backpack bouncing against my thigh, the water slowly seeping through my pants. I hoist the bag over my shoulder, letting it hang by the strap instead. I walk… well stumble really, over to the entrance to the elevator, raising my entire limp arm up so that I can hit the button.

As soon as the button lights up I allow my arm to fall back to my side and my body to lean against the wall, the side of my forehead pressed against the rough, faded, canary yellow plaster. I haven't been this exhausted since my second year after Kat and I broke up, when I returned to work after my unplanned vacation I ended up throwing myself into work to try and forget our relationship and to try and stop myself from drowning in despair. I think I probably ended up working twenty-four or thirty-six hour shifts regularly, volunteering for extra duty, first in the ICU before I finished my rotation and then and then in the ER. I yawn, groaning as I bury my head against the wall when I hear the ding that tells me the elevator has arrived.

With shuffling footsteps that echo off of the walls like a second heartbeat, the only reminder that I'm still awake in an otherwise silent world. I shuffle myself into the elevator, closing my eyes and letting another yawn escape as I look over at the panel of buttons, one of the last obstacles that separates me from a bed. I blink as I try to get my eyes to focus on the numbers on the buttons, but they remain blurry as I fight against the drowsiness. I reach out as I finally manage to get my eyes to focus, my hand sliding weakly against the panel of buttons, stopping slightly to press against the button with the number eight on it.

I close my eyes as I lean against the faux wood panels on the inside of the elevator, the feeling of my body becoming heavier as it begins to accelerate upward he only momentary break in the otherwise monotonous journey. I yawn again as my mind begins to wander.

What would it have been like if things had been able to go ahead as planned. Would I be upstairs with Bo right now? Would our dinner be over or would she be upstairs with me? Would we be talking…

I almost laughed at that thought. I sincerely doubt that we would be talking right now, given our inability to keep our hands off of each other, we would most likely be in my bed or on the couch. I wonder what it would be like to touch her? To feel her skin against mine as we slowly come together in a primal dance.

I sigh and shake my head, suppressing the shudders of arousal that travels through my weary body, at the thought of Bo's naked skin, of her above me, below me, inside of me. I shudder again, heat beginning to gather between my legs as I become lost in the images that my imaginations conjured of smooth supple skin, of my hands against her skin touching her, of my tongue tasting her skin, the taste of her, the feeling of her against me, and of her touching me, tasting me. Her hands, her body, soft against mine, her touch welcome and wanted, feelings that course through me, welcome, wanted, and desired.

I can feel an ache between my legs, at the thoughts in my mind but I shake my head roughly and swiftly, vanquishing the images that my suddenly active mind has conjured. Another groan escapes from me, although this one is of a vastly different nature from the ones before it. I blink open my eyes as I hear the door creak open, the supposedly pleasant salmon of the elevator doors gradually being replaced by the sight of the ugly pastel wallpaper that covers the dimly lit interior hallway.

I slowly push myself up and off the wall, inching my way out of the elevator and into the hallway, my feet sending pain rebounding through my body from standing on them for so many hours. I glance back once as the elevator doors close behind me, knowing that in only a few hours I will have to use it once again. I turn my head back to the hallway I slowly begin to shuffle my feet across the carpet, the sound of my footsteps barely audible as I travel through the otherwise silent, dark hallway. The identical doors leading to the apartments pass by, each wooden one the same as the one before it and the one after it, the only thing changing is the metal plate affixed to the door boldly, and loudly giving away the apartment number, a deep contrast to the otherwise dark and dank hallway. I yawn again as I make my way down towards the end of the hall finally coming to a halt in front of the door.

Swinging my backpack around to the front I quickly fumble my keys out of their designated pocket trying not to drop them in the process. My hands are unsteady in their exhausted state and I slide them into the lock, listening for the audible click of the mechanism sliding into place and unlocking the door, the last barrier between me and my very much-desired bed.

"Well it would seem that you're finally home…" Tamsin's teasing voice call out as I stumble into the apartment, quickly toeing off my shoes before I stagger into the living room. "Lauren!"

"Mhrmm?" I groan out as I glare at her as she quickly makes her way over to me. All I want to do is go to bed and sleep...

"Radio-nucleotides..." I mumble as I begin to make my way over towards the couch, ready to collapse.

"You're speaking in chemistry again. Come on." Tamsin mutters, annoyed as she walks over to me grabbing me by the arm as she begins to drag me in the direction of my bedroom. "Seriously, how long have you been working?"

"Dunno… thirty-six hours? Was home for a few yesterday afternoon, but…" I'm cut off when I yawn again, stumbling as Tamsin continues to drag me in the direction of my bedroom. "Why dragging…?"

"Because you've slept on the couch for the last two nights you were home, and honestly I'm sick of having to try and carry your heavy ass to bed." She grumbles before stopping for a moment and adding. "Your girlfriend dropped by."

"Not girlfriend." I groan, giving up the battle to keep myself upright as I lean most of my weight against Tamsin's waiting shoulder. "Haven't talked about relationship yet. Been on one date, too soon…"

"Uhuh… yeah sure. I think I'll tell you what happened during her visit once you can actually carry on a conversation without yawning. Now let's get you to bed Scrubs. Do you have work in the morning?" I let out an annoyed grumble before nodding my head in affirmation.

"They're running you into the ground again aren't they?" She sighs as we stop for a moment, the creaking of my door a welcome and relieving sound.

"'S flu season… what'd'ja expect?" I mumble, my words sounding slurred to even my own ears, as Tamsin lets me go, pushing me gently towards my bed.

"I don't know." She sighed before pushing me gently onto my bed, quickly grabbing my backpack from my shoulders. The dull thump of the bag falling to the floor tells me that she most likely dropped it on the ground at her feet. I can feel her tugging at my waist as I'm dragged back into a standing position, I can feel something warm and soft shoved into my hand.

I blink my tired, heavy, eyes open as I look down, taking in the red and black plaid of my favourite pair of pyjamas. I look up at Tamsin, my eyes blinking blearily as I do.

"What?" She asks before she glances down at the clothing items in my hand. "If you're looking for some ulterior motive, there isn't one. It's been a while since you've done laundry Lauren, they're the only clean ones you have left."

I glance down at the pyjamas again, trying to get my tired eyes to stay open. I yawn again before I slowly lift my head up to look at Tamsin. "Thank-you."

All she does is smirk back at me in reply. "We're even after this one I think?"

"Nope." I fire back, a sleepy smile tugging at my lips. "Not even close."

"Sleep well Lauren." Tamsin says before she walks out, closing the door behind her as she does so. I can hear a pause in her footsteps, followed by the low murmur of a hushed voice as her footsteps begin to fall away again.

I wonder what this was all about?

* * *

Another day, another alarm going off at four in the morning as I drag myself out of bed and begin to get ready to leave for the hospital.

I yawn as I fumble around with the can of instant coffee.

"Come on…" I mutter as I try to get my short fingernails under the lid.

Do I curse the inventor of tin cans for this, or the various developers of plastic over the millennia?

I groan as the lid continues to refuse to budge. Why did Ciara have to be the one to go grocery shopping yesterday? I texted both of them, but it was her who had to buy the groceries? I sigh, annoyed. Ciara usually got a different kind of coffee, a more expensive brand that she preferred

I yawn again as I glance over at the clock, the dim light from overhead casting long shadows over all parts of the room. A forlorn sigh escapes from my lips as I look over at the clock again, 4:23 I need to get ready to leave. I glance down at the coffee longingly before I gently put the tin back in its place on the shelf.

I wince at the thought of having to drink the coffee that they make in the break room.

I sigh as I glance around the room one last time, before my eyes fall onto something that I hadn't noticed the previous night when I'd stumbled in through the door. I smile as I walk over to the bouquet of red roses standing upright in one of our glass vases. I reach out to run my fingers along the soft pedals, and for a moment I can't help but feel the first stirrings of envy of Tamsin or Ciara.

They really are beautiful flowers, I smile before I shake my head and move my hand away from the flowers, my hand trailing briefly along the cool glass of the vase before I pull away sighing, and smiling despite myself. I envy the relationship that those two can have with each other, the fact that even after all the time they've been together the fact that one of them did this for the other…

I'm glad that Tamsin found her soulmate in Ciara, they really are an ideal match.

I glance over at the clock again, wincing when I notice the time, I'd been too caught up in reminiscing to realize that so much time had past! I'm going to be late.

I quickly run back to my room, grabbing my backpack off the floor next to where it had been dropped unceremoniously by Tamsin the night before. I shudder as I glance around my room, taking in the layer of dust that seems to occupy everything, the clothing spilling out of the laundry basket. I look down at my scrubs, still piled on the floor from the night before as I quickly pull open the door to my closet and try to find my spar set of scrubs.

Frantically I push one piece of clothing after another aside before I finally come across the dark blue pants and the light blue top. "Oh thank-god I remembered to wash them!"

I hear my phone vibrate from my nearby nightstand as it receives an email. Without even thinking about it I grab it, shoving it into my bag along with the scrubs in my hands, but my phone vibrates once again causing me to sigh as I press the home button, causing the screen to light up.

The first thing I notice is the little green phone icon next to the notification telling me that I have two missed calls, but its the name attached to those calls that causes my heart to sputter for a moment before it speeds up again.

Bo.

She had returned my call after all. I hadn't thought to check last night, far too exhausted from so much time on the job with so little opportunity for a break. I glance over at the red glowing clock again before I sigh cursing my own weakness as I unlock the phone and quickly navigate my way into the voicemail. I stop myself just before I can tap the message and listen to it.

Do I really have the time? I glance over at the clock again before I close my eyes and ignore it.

I tap the message and bring the phone up to my ear.

 _"_ _Hey Lauren it's me… well I guess you can't just identify who me is from just my voice can you? It's Bo."_ She says into the phone, her voice loud and the noise in the background making it harder to hear her then it normally would. _"About the dinner? Don't worry about it. Like I said you're not the only doctor I know, I kinda figured that this would happen, although I didn't think it would happen this soon, I mean today of all days… or really I should probably say yesterday of all days given that I think it's after midnight now. The hazards of having a doctor for a soulmate I guess huh? Ah well, you go and save lives, we can always reschedule a date, patients in the ER can't wait. I can."_

Her voice sounds cool as she speaks the words but there's a hint of an edge in her voice, a slightly bitter undertone. I sigh as I press the phone closer to my ear, listening to the sounds of her voice, and trying to ignore the fact that they're as soothing to my ears as they are to my heart.

 _"_ _I hope that you get the roses that I sent, or maybe they're sitting out in the hallway of your apartment building right now? What kind of crazy hours do you and your roommate keep?"_ She pauses before she continues. " _Sorry about that, it was out of line. It's none of my business the hours you and your roommate keep, or Ciara for that matter."_

I can feel my heart rate pick-up at the revelation, a slow blush creeping up on my cheeks. Those had been for me?

I can feel a giddy happiness spread through me as I continue to listen to Bo speak, her voice slowly changing to a more familiar tone as she begins to relax.

_"_ _I mean I think it's my business what hours you keep because that kind of is going to influence our lives for the next few years. And there I went spouting off about the future. We haven't even talked about the present. Oh boy… I think you've rubbed off on me already, I don't normally babble like this while I'm on the phone."_

I chuckle at the image that comes to my mind of her pacing back and forth up and down one of the long corridors in the university that contain the smaller lecture halls often used for tutorials and problem analysis. I laugh at the mental images of her free hand flying around as she talks into the phone.

" _Anyways… if you want maybe we could try and just hang out at my place instead? I may not know how to cook as well as you and your pasta dishes, but I have plenty of take-out menus and their numbers on speed-dial. Or maybe you want to try and reschedule?"_ She says as she continues to babble into the phone. _"I'm good with whatever you want to do. I guess I'll try calling you again at a more decent hour? It's close to one in the morning right now, and you're probably asleep, or maybe you're still at the hospital? Anyways I hope we can talk in a few hours. I mi—no sorry you don't need to hear about that. I hope we can talk in a few hours ba- Lo. Good luck, and save lives."_ My heart flutters as I heart the last of the words that she speaks, at the conversation that she had, at the words she had nearly spoken, the name that she had nearly called me.

I can also feel my stomach twisting at the message that she left for me, the nervousness that laced the words that she had spoken into the phone only a few hours earlier. I let out an annoyed breath, wondering how it was possible that I could sleep through my phone going off when the similar sounds of an alarm clock would wake me only a few hours later.

I glance over at the clock and all I can do is sigh. The blinking colons were counting down the moments until I would be late for work. I finally allow my eyes to read the clock and my eyes widen as my stomach drops when I realize that I have 15 minutes to make it to the hospital, something that is normally a half-hour drive.

Shit! I curse again in my head as I grab my backpack and run our the door before I can even think about what Bo means by a reasonable hour.

* * *

"Dr. Lewis? What are you going here?" Francine asks, surprised as I make my way over to the nurses station. "Dr. Lewis, do you even realize what day it is today?"

"It's Saturday." I sigh, smiling light at her as I wait for her to hand me on of the patients charts.

"Dr. Lewis, how long had you been on shift for when stumbled out of here last night?" She asks, her voice full of concern as she reaches out and pats my hand lightly. "It's your day off today, and I thought you had a date last night with your sweetheart? What are you doing here instead of at home with her?"

"Huh?" I blink, trying to get my mind to come into focus. "I have today off?"

"You have the weekend off Dr. Lewis, do you not remember how excited you were about your date? You couldn't stop talking about it, and about her." She chuckles as she reaches out, grabbing my wrist and turning it over gently. "This means something that you're only just beginning to understand, and finding her, finding your Bo is a precious and wonderful gift."

I look up at Francine, but she looks over me, her eyes dull as if she's lost in memory. I can only stare at her as her eyes become misty. I glance down at one of the hands holding my wrist, a watch so like my own strapped to her wrist, covering her mark.

"Francine?" I prompt gently, as I turn my hand over in her grip, catching her fingers with my own. "Are you alright?"

This is the second time that this has happened. I wonder what's going on with her? I glance down at the mark on her wrist again, at the beautiful watch on her wrist, but when I glance over at her scrub top I don't see the telltale bulge of wedding rings or of a necklace.

"Dr. Lewis?" Francine asks as she looks over at me again before she smiles at me. "I apologize, I was just lost in my memories."

"It's alright… I mean I'm the one who should be sorry I didn't mean to trigger bad memories."

She smiles at me, her eyes warm as she replies. "They aren't all bad Dr. Lewis, so fear not, there are just as many happy as there are sad. Now go, be with your sweetheart, and enjoy the time that you have with her, because if there is one thing I've learned it is that life is far to short."

I look over at her, wanting to open my mouth to question what it was that she was telling me, but I close my mouth again. I don't want to dredge up bad memories, to make her relieve the obviously painful memories. All Francine does is smile at me as she begins to make shooing motions, telling me that it is time for me to leave and go home, and enjoy the time that I have with my sweetheart.

I didn't have the heart to correct her during our conversation, to tell her that Bo and I aren't together yet, and that I have no right to call her my sweetheart, at least not right now. One day soon I hope, my heart fluttering in my chest as I do so, only to come crashing back down as it dawns on me that not right now could mean weeks or months.

I shake my head, clearing my thoughts. There's little point in dwelling on the semantics of a relationship, especially when soulmates are involved, some never bother defining their relationship, assuming a mutual exclusivity immediately, others end up together, engaged, and married within a year or so, and there are others who follow the route that Tamsin and Ciara have and move at a snails pace, most of them fall somewhere in between following a progression that mirrors that of a relationship between mismatched or unmarked pairs, albeit faster. I glance back at Francine, smiling as I make my way back towards the entrance to the residents locker room.

"And Dr. Lewis?" I stop, spinning on my heel as I look back at her. "Remember that some things are finite and fragile, others are far stronger and more enduring then you think. Be careful which one you chose because you have to live with it for the rest of your life."

I raise an eyebrow wondering what she was talking about. Fragile and finite, stronger and more enduring?

I sigh before looking up at Francine and smiling. "And it would seem that you've succeeded in baffling me once again."

Francine responds with a chuckle before she smiles at me once again. "Everything reveals itself in time Dr. Lewis, just remember that things can only get harder from here."

I blink as I look at Francine, a sense of foreboding coming over me.

Out of the corner of my eye I catch sight of the small ball moving up and down as if it was nodding agreeing with the words that are coming out of Francine's mouth, but how was that possible? I close my eyes and blink, but as always it's gone when I open my eyes. I wonder what all of this could possibly mean for me, for Tamsin and Ciara, and for the budding relationship between Bo and I.

* * *

My phone begins to vibrate on my hip as I move around the stove humming to myself as I flip the pancakes, paying attention to the colour as I do so. The precise nature of the chemical reactions the pancakes are undergoing are complex, and far too delicate to be interrupted by answering the phone.

I can feel it vibrate against my hip again. I poke at the pancakes once before deciding that they were done enough to let me take them off the heat. I quickly put the spatula down to the side as I reach into the carrying-case on my hip and pull the phone out, not bothering to look at the caller ID as I swipe my finger across the screen to answer the call.

"Dr. Lewis." I say into the phone, my voice louder and clearer then it should have sounded given how little sleep I've gotten over the last few days.

"Who do you think it is?" Is the brisk reply I get from the other end.

"What is it?" I ask, trying my best to keep my tone neutral.

"We need to talk." That's all the voice says as the house phone begins to ring, calling out it's automated message.

"Call from Bo Dennis." It calls out mispronouncing her last name in the process. I close my eyes as I pull the phone away from my ear, dreading what I'm about to do.


End file.
